Annoying

Climate change sucks

By Jules - 17/07/2023 06:00 - Germany

Today, and for the past seven weeks, the weather forecast has been the same, invariably saying, "This week, it’ll be either hot or rainy, but next week it’ll be mild and sunny." I’m still waiting for "next week's” weather. FML

I agree, your life sucks 583

You deserved it 180

Happy together

By Anonymous - 05/07/2023 02:00

Today, I finally reached the age where me just being alive annoys my wife. She asked me during a movie if I “have to breathe like that because it’s so damn annoying.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 833

You deserved it 171

Obsessed and possessed

By ugh just make it stop - 01/07/2023 18:00

Today, after weeks of my yelling, my boyfriend finally listened and got a hobby. Instead of getting into something sensible like martial arts, he chose tabletop gaming. Now I have to listen to hours of boring stories about pretend fantasy worlds, and admit to everyone that my boyfriend is a nerd. FML

I agree, your life sucks 135

You deserved it 1 928

Controlling

By Anonymous - 01/07/2023 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, even though I was very clear before I went on holiday that I was going completely zero contact to de-stress, my mother rang at least twice a day. When I stopped answering the phone, she found the direct number of the local police station in a foreign country and sent them to find me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 109

Risky business

By PleaseCalmDownThisIsALibrary - 30/06/2023 16:00 - United States - Columbia

Today, I'm just a simple librarian. Last week, we had to call the cops on two separate aggressive patrons. Today, I had to call the cops yet again. WTF? FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 88

Fine mess

By Anonymous - 28/06/2023 02:00

Today, I begged my parents not to take me to a restaurant for my birthday, but sure enough, they took me to one, along with my siblings, aunts, uncles, you name it. Ordering with them is a nightmare, so after a whole half-hour the waiter still hadn’t gotten everyone’s complicated orders written down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 844

You deserved it 125

Monday Monday, so good to me…

By Anonymous - 27/06/2023 02:00 - Australia

Today, my 73 year-old coworker has made a mountain of work for me to plough through due to her incompetence. I had to work through over 400 emails, since she thought unplugging the router would help, and in doing so, I have picked up on hundreds of mistakes she has made with clients, and had to apologise to each one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 795

You deserved it 122

Technology hate humans

By Helpppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp - 25/06/2023 08:00 - United States

Today, I have a keyboard that randomly jams. If it happens while I'm typing, it will spam said letter for an extended period of time, and nothing I can do makes it stop. It can happen to any key, even the spacebar. It also happens often enough that it goes from mildly convenient to really fucking annoying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 472

You deserved it 320

Move your ass

By Anonymous - 23/06/2023 06:00 - Germany

Today, my boyfriend sits in an empty apartment, complaining about it being a rat hole. HE picked the place, HE refuses my help to decorate, as well as my offer to get his stuff from the old place, and yes, he could totally afford something better. But sure, his life is shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 669

You deserved it 186

Beggars can't be choosers

By I'm grown, damnit! - 21/06/2023 18:00

Today, my mom won't let me have the extra hotel room she booked all to myself, even though it's just me, her, and my sister. Basically I can share a room with her or with my sister, but I can't be alone. I'm 23. FML

I agree, your life sucks 586

You deserved it 449

Training day

By Anonymous - 15/06/2023 09:00 - United States - Tualatin

Today, my work sent out a fake phishing email as a test. I didn’t fall for it, but because I’m in tech support, we were flooded with panicked callers. People who fell for it have to take training, or their accounts will be locked - which means we will be flooded with panicked callers again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 789

You deserved it 135

Please leave

By Anonymous - 14/06/2023 00:02

Today, it’s been two weeks since my partner invited his sad sack best friend to temporarily move in. I hate his guts. Apparently his mother’s house, which he still lived in, has mold damage and they don’t know how long it will take to repair. Oh, and his quack doctor prescribed him literal dirt to eat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 770

You deserved it 149

Bugged

By Anonymous - 11/06/2023 03:00 - Germany - Undeloh

Today, I hate having bugs in the house so I covered all doors and windows in fly screen. This prevents 80% of the bugs from finding their way inside, and 100% of those from finding their way back out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 593

You deserved it 214

Family day

By Anonymous - 09/06/2023 01:30 - India - Puducherry

Today, all I wanted was to take my two kids and their two favourite cousins to the beach on their last day of vacation together. My mother-in-law went into full beast mode, shouting about how I'm always roaming around and being irresponsible. The kids never meet and are from different cities. FML

I agree, your life sucks 745

You deserved it 115

The Watchers

By Anonymous - 03/06/2023 15:00

Today, my in-laws just bought the house opposite. They were bad enough 50 miles away but now they’re here all the time. We’ve had to start locking doors and diving to the floor every time we hear our front gate open. Even then they try to open the door and stand in the garden for up to 15 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 060

You deserved it 127

Not to mention the muffled dialogue

By Anonymous - 30/05/2023 15:00 - Germany

Today, I thought of the saying “TV killed the radio star”, because in the show I'm currently watching it is so dark most of the time that you can neither see people’s faces, nor what is actually happening. If that’s modern television, we might just as well go back to radio. FML

I agree, your life sucks 531

You deserved it 179

The itch

By Oh man, it itches - 27/05/2023 11:00 - United States

Today, I finally got prescribed something for my skin problems. The good news: It works really well. The bad news: When the doctor said one of the potential side effects was a "horrible rash," she really meant it when she said, "horrible." I swear to God, I was about to rip my chest open, due to it itching so hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 684

You deserved it 99

Who's the boss?

By m…… - 26/05/2023 12:00

Today, one of my managers explained to me, very slowly and loudly, what a pallet jack is for. I've been at the warehouse for 6 months now and was actively using a pallet jack at the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 698

You deserved it 101

Don't know, don't care

By Fuck you too, Grandma - 25/05/2023 05:00 - United States

Today, my mom told me that on my graduation day, the reason she (and my dad) almost didn't show up was because they had to spend almost an hour convincing my grandma to attend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 720

You deserved it 115

Needy old man

By Anonymous - 24/05/2023 20:00 - Australia

Today, it's been 3 days since my 95 year-old grandfather got a Vital Call (a big red button to call someone in an emergency). As I live close by, I'm one of the main contacts. I've been called over 6 times, most recently at 1:30 a.m. because he couldn't pull his pants up. He needs to be in a nursing home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 105

Elephants upstairs

By Anonymous - 23/05/2023 10:00

Today, yet again, my upstairs neighbor can’t stop stomping. It’s troubling. There are random noises and thuds at 3 a.m. I've emailed the leasing office several times to no avail. I even told the leasing office that I didn't care if my neighbor has insomnia, I really don’t, I just have to be up at work by 6:00 a.m. every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 122

Information pending

By Weary traveler - 20/05/2023 11:00 - Latvia

Today, I was sitting at an airport bar when my flight, which was only supposed to leave in an hour, showed up as "Final call for boarding." I ran through the airport, only to find out they hadn't started boarding yet. Fucking Ryanair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 744

You deserved it 121

Nice guys

By Yourlossbech - 19/05/2023 00:01

Today, the woman who turned me down would rather date a bum who smokes weed all day and works at Panera Bread. I have 3 college degrees, a respectable career, and I’m drug free. No matter how much I point this out, she gets butthurt, and has now felt the need to block my social media. FML

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 2 474

Dungeons and dragons drama

By Anonymous - 17/05/2023 18:00 - Australia - Taren Point

Today, I found out why DnD is recommended for ages 13 and up. I ran a kids' session supposed to be for ages 12-16, but a few younger ones turned up. It took them an hour and a half to kill 3 zombies, and then they wanted to go on a murder rampage through the town. I'm secretly hoping they don't turn up next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 555

You deserved it 291

Pipe down

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - New Orleans

Today, I started a new job. I'm now trapped in a small office with a woman who says, "Oh my gravy!" constantly. In response to everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 121

You deserved it 2 302

Flash flood

By Anonymous - 13/05/2023 06:00 - Botswana - Gaborone

Today, before we went out, my four year-old brother left the water running in the upstairs bathroom. By the time we came back, there was a flood in our entire house. Guess who was asked to mop it all up… FML

I agree, your life sucks 707

You deserved it 104

Virtual hugs

By Anonymous - 10/05/2023 09:00 - Philippines - Angeles City

Today, my aunt vented her anger on us for no reason, and her words really cut like a knife. I always pray that someday I'll have a home that I can call my own, where I can lay my head and heart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 824

You deserved it 132

The Office 2: Electric Boogaloo

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out that my desk is perfectly placed so that my boss can shoot me with a Nerf gun from his office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 453

You deserved it 4 150

Gym culture

By Anonymous - 08/05/2023 10:00 - United States

Today, I went to the gym. Once in the changing room, I realized I'd left my headphones at home. I had to work out without any music, so I spent the next 90 minutes being reminded how loud and obnoxious some gym-goers can be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 676

Get back on the horse

By Beth - 03/05/2023 12:00 - United States - Stamford

Today, I found out that I didn't get a job I really wanted, despite doing well on third round interviews (3 hours with 6 people), and having a good connection with the person I would've reported to. Now I'm upset and dropping the ball on emailing interviewers for the other good leads I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 781

You deserved it 199

Keywords

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I agree, your life sucks 15

You deserved it 15

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I agree, your life sucks 10

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The Top

Today, I got rear-ended because my ultra-clingy girlfriend wouldn't let go of my hand long enough for me to shift gears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 604

You deserved it 11 733

Today, I was menaced by a shirtless crackhead with an aluminum bat for, "parking in the wrong parking lot" - not parking spot, parking LOT - while delivering pizza to one of many nearby apartment buildings. I'm not allowed to carry a weapon to defend myself, unless I wanna shell out $75 for a Mag flashlight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 393

You deserved it 129

Today, a guy commented on a picture of my boyfriend and I kissing on facebook, and said to please stop 'testing' him. He also messaged me saying how he wishes he could get a girlfriend like me, that I'm gorgeous, and that he wants to go out with me. I'm his cousin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 433

You deserved it 3 211

Today, in the booze aisle of Walmart at 1 a.m., an older woman asked for recommendations, telling me she's just trying to get drunk and enjoy herself as she recently found out that she's dying, signed her will that day and her family were being shitty about it. I picked a bottle, she thanked me and said, "Have a good life kid, and don't trust your fucking family." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 281

You deserved it 142

Today, my drunken mother woke up after having passed out and yelled at me for ditching school. It took half an hour to explain that it's 5:00, and I've already been to school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 732

You deserved it 2 041

Today, while working my job as a swim instructor, my coworker sprayed me with the hose. I instinctively held up what I was holding to block the cold water. I was holding a 4 year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 259

You deserved it 5 144