Dogs and Animals: Checks out

Checks out

By Asirual - 02/05/2011 18:02 - United States

Today, while handing out business cards to promote my new dog grooming business, I stopped to talk to a potential client. She let me get all the way through my 15-minute speech, before bothering to tell me she didn't have a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 415

You deserved it 13 196

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Same thing different taste

By StudMuffinette - 18/07/2011 19:40 - United States

Today, I was at work when someone came in asking me to brush their pet Shih Tzu. After an hour of vigorously grooming through the multiple knots, I called the owner to collect their dog. When she got here she said, "Oh, did I say brush? I meant shave." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 274

You deserved it 2 979

Social gatherings make me nervous

By Dog lady - 27/10/2024 18:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I went to a friend's wedding and was seated at a table with a bunch of strangers. To break the ice, I told a funny story about my dog. Turns out one of the guests is an animal behaviorist and spent the next hour explaining how I’ve been raising him all wrong. Thanks for the unsolicited advice during cocktail hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 434

You deserved it 193

The Rainbow Bridge

By fishyrael - 30/10/2019 20:00

Today, at my job at a pet store, my boss told me to go outside and hand out flyers. I saw a man sitting on a bench and walked up, saying, "Hi! Do you have a pet?" He teared up and said, "I just put her down this morning." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 239

You deserved it 180

By dogbreederssuck - 03/02/2015 15:26 - United Kingdom - Ormskirk

Today, at work, I had to tell a woman that there is no such thing as a "pedigree Beahuahuadoodle", and that she'd essentially paid $500 for a mutt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 513

You deserved it 2 878

Doghouse

By Krissi - 21/08/2023 14:00 - United States

Today, I was late for a video conference with my boss. As I frantically tried to fix my messy hair, my dog thought it was the perfect time to play fetch. I ended up joining the meeting with a squeaky toy in hand and an appearance that would make a scarecrow look put together. My boss found it hilarious, but I'm pretty sure my career aspirations are now in the doghouse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 513

By CRWMEN - 22/12/2009 05:57 - United States

Today, my girlfriend canceled our date I've been looking forward to all week because her dog was having puppies. She doesn't have a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 406

You deserved it 3 286

By Treats For Days - 19/07/2013 13:54 - Canada - Medicine Hat

Today, I was on drive-thru where I work. Our policy is that we can give free treats to dogs that come through. A woman came in and I noticed her dog. Without a thought, I grabbed a treat and asked if her dog wanted one. I looked again. The 'dog' was her daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 118

You deserved it 26 557

By Anonymous - 27/10/2010 05:58 - United States

Today, I spent all day handing out flyers advertising my services as a psychic. I got only one call. The caller wanted to inform me that I had misspelt the word "psychic" on my flyer. She was right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 786

You deserved it 42 619

By Anonymous - 20/05/2009 20:22 - United States

Today, I was out walking my dog. A cute woman said, "Nice dog!" Without thinking, I replied, "You too!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 291

You deserved it 44 876

Beggars can be choosers

By Rebecca Palermo - 14/12/2020 11:03

Today, I saw a girl asking for money on the median of an entrance to a parking lot with her dog. Later, I bought a box of dog treats for her. I drove up and handed it to her. She rolled her eyes and said, "How the hell am I supposed to carry that?" I sat there in stunned disbelief with the box she refused to take. FML

I agree, your life sucks 957

You deserved it 225

amberita28 0

Monday 2 May 2011 22:58

So you had a whole 15 minute conversation about your pet grooming business and you didn't bother asking her any questions? Especially important ones like, "So, what kind of dog do you own?"

10_4Franky 0

Monday 2 May 2011 22:58

At least she was polite and let you finish your spiel. She wasn't being a bitch.

Comments

babycakess10 0

Monday 2 May 2011 23:53

well maybe you didn't give her the chance to say something and she didn't want to be rude by interrupting. but makes for a good practice speech..?

Garytt 0

Monday 2 May 2011 23:54

cats need grooming too

stevenmx86 7

Tuesday 3 May 2011 0:03

Ydi I am all for small businesses but be quick and to the point at all times... If she had questions she'd ask them doesn't need to be bored by a speech... I'd have let you go too just to waste your time

perdix 29

Tuesday 3 May 2011 0:05

Why the **** is a speech about dig grooming 15 minutes long? Did you go into the details of squeezing their anal gland? On the plus side, she was probably hot for you. You could have spoken about anything and she was getting wet just watching your mouth move;)

babycakess10 0

Tuesday 3 May 2011 4:55

maybe you could go to his groomers cuz your a horn dog. not everything is sex related.

perdix 29

Tuesday 3 May 2011 5:16

Cuz I don't like getting my anal gland squeezed.

OhSnap_NoWay 0

Tuesday 3 May 2011 0:09

wow she doesn't have a dog, yet she still listened to you talk about dogs for 15 mins f her life

s3xymoma 1

Tuesday 3 May 2011 0:09

maybe she was looking to get a dog. n wanted to learn about it

CitrusGirl 0

Tuesday 3 May 2011 0:21

Maybe you should start your pitch with "do you own a dog?"

Inspired22 11

Tuesday 3 May 2011 0:25

A fifteen minute spiel is way too much. Anyone who has worked in sales knows that. I am a dog owner myself, and I wouldn't want to hear you go on for fifteen minutes. But yeah, I hate it when people let you give your spiel and waste your time when they aren't interested at all. Sorry!