Sex, Accident and Intimacy: Cool moves, bro - FML

Cool moves, bro

By Anonymous - 30/06/2012 09:45

Spicy

Today, in an attempt to be sexy, my boyfriend picked me up and threw me down onto the bed. I fell straight through it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 369

You deserved it 5 692

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Same thing different taste

Romantic

By Anonymous - 14/12/2010 01:04 - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to pick me up, throw me over his shoulder and take me to the bedroom. Little did he know that he literally threw me over his shoulder, and I face-planted on the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 836

You deserved it 3 166

Cool move, dude

By Anonymous - 09/12/2010 09:47 - France

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to pick me up and throw me on the bed. I rolled off and broke my collarbone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 660

You deserved it 4 266

It's just a flesh wound!

By manhandled - 01/02/2012 18:05 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 168

You deserved it 4 026

Are you experienced?

By still laughing - 28/08/2015 21:48 - United States - Providence

Spicy

Today, I was going down on my boyfriend when he stood up on the bed to get a different experience. I started to get aggressive and pushed him up against the wall. I forgot our bed was on wheels and the bed started sliding away and his body slid down the wall. So much for being sexy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 516

You deserved it 5 109

By alltern8ive - 09/11/2009 05:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to be romantic by dipping me backwards and kissing me. He dropped me on my butt and stepped on my hand while trying to help me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 312

You deserved it 5 111

Major romcom vibes

By staciedee - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be cute to try and pick me up while kissing, instead he tripped and slammed the back of my head on the corner of the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 501

You deserved it 5 009

The Great Pretender

By CJune24 - 22/10/2014 21:24 - United Kingdom - Huddersfield

Spicy

Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 539

You deserved it 5 452

By Anonymous - 27/11/2011 22:46 - United States

Today, my boyfriend picked me up bridal-style to carry me to our bed. As he carried me through the bedroom door, the dog ran between his legs and sent us both crashing to the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 458

You deserved it 3 604

You tried!

By Noname - 15/02/2009 23:15 - United States

Spicy

Today, I wanted to seduce my boyfriend so I put on my sexiest lingerie and started playing mood music. As he was eating dinner, I climbed up on the table and started seductively crawling across to him. The table collapsed under my weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 946

You deserved it 50 954

You tried

By Loveless - 10/09/2009 06:18 - United States

Spicy

Today, during foreplay, I was trying to be sexy. But instead I fell off the bed, landed in the laundry basket, and was attacked by the dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 160

You deserved it 5 702

Next

Top comments

robertlovespi 3

Saturday 30 June 2012 19:29

That's a different way to break the bed during sex...

richy90255 8

Saturday 30 June 2012 19:31

THe bed must have been worn out ... If u know what I mean

Comments

kquelly 1

Sunday 1 July 2012 1:01

How do u fall THROUGH a bed?!?!?!?

Primmly 11

Sunday 1 July 2012 1:04

Are you sure you're not a ghost?

thisismeFMLing 0

Sunday 1 July 2012 1:08

Boyfriend's FML: Today, in attempt to look strong, I picked up my fatass girlfriend and threw her on the bed, she fell through. FML.

puddin128 1

Sunday 1 July 2012 1:26

Well it ain't his fault....

Lionesse 15

Sunday 1 July 2012 1:53

Just walk it off and say "Damn bed was defective when I bought it" and continue your passion filled day :D No biggie

ceejay_williams 1

Sunday 1 July 2012 2:33

OMG!! I agree with 10 though ... o_O srry

unknown_user5566 26

Sunday 1 July 2012 5:44

This is the second time I've seen you pat a whole new comment just to reply to someone else. Use the reply to comment feature; it's there for a reason.

kaitie311 1

Sunday 1 July 2012 2:37

DAMN!!!!! Are you that fat, did you hear it whimper!?

emenesso 13

Sunday 1 July 2012 2:42

Turn off no-clip mode, OP. :P FYL lol, that sucks.

Sierra_Rose_1 4

Sunday 1 July 2012 3:28

fyl ! maybe it just might be time to go to the store for a new bed !

botdflove 4

Sunday 1 July 2012 4:32

Haha That's sad

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Management Work Poopoo peepee Awkward Relatable Coworkers Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Animals ADHD Dogs Transportation Love Dating Health Anxiety Technology Mental health Sleep Roommate Clumsy Noise AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 485

You deserved it 38 930

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 784

You deserved it 22 711

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I had band practice for our duo. I've been playing cello for almost a year and wanted to incorporate it. He picked it up for pretty much the first time and sounded surprisingly good. I was excited until I realized he sounded better than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 538

You deserved it 526

Today, I found out I'm allergic to soil, pollen, dust, mold, the colors green, yellow, orange, black and grey, most metals, wood, carpet, drywall, most hygiene and beauty products, and plastic. Basically, I was told to avoid the entire planet and everything man-made. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 412

You deserved it 682

Today, for some reason, I suddenly started having convulsions all over my body. It lasted until my cat showed up and purred his heart out on my chest until it stopped. He then immediately demanded that I feed him. Apparently, according to my cat, my only reason for existing is to feed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 872

You deserved it 269

Today, I was kicked out of college for not attending a class I wasn't ever enrolled in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 288

You deserved it 125

Today, I was fired from my job for "lack of work". What that means is that my boss hired his good-for-nothing lazy son, who then got too big of a mortgage, and he had to let me go to pay him a higher salary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 994

You deserved it 212

Today I broke my glasses beyond repair. I am very nearly legally blind. I get my glasses at Walmart and today, Christmas, is the only day out of the entire year that they are closed. Merry Christmas to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 570

You deserved it 1 072