Cars, Insects and Animals: Creeped out

Creeped out

By Baustigt - 06/08/2014 13:34 - Australia

Today, as I was driving, a massive cockroach clicked its way across my windshield. I pulled over to fling it out the window, but it spread its wings and flew around like a hook-armed stabbing machine. I lost it in the dark car and now I can't find it. It's going to be a long drive home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 992

You deserved it 4 591

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Same thing different taste

Hi guys

By unemployed - 11/07/2016 19:09 - United States - Modesto

Today, I walked out the back door of my place of employment and looked down to see a huge cockroach. This is quite a normal occurrence, so I thought nothing of it until I realized it was struggling to drag the corpse of one of its friends into the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 262

You deserved it 819

Get away from me!

By Bobby The Baker - 03/04/2019 16:00

Today, a cockroach flew towards me, and out of panic I dropped my car keys in the sewer. Not only did I lose my keys, but the cake I made for a client is stuck inside the car. It's for a wedding, and they're arriving in the reception area in a few minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 159

You deserved it 479

Those things freak me out

By Gilly - 02/09/2023 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was cooking dinner when I noticed a cockroach on the kitchen counter. I reflexively tried to spray it with what I had to hand, which was window cleaner, but it seems to have pissed it off and flew right at me instead. I screamed and ran out of the kitchen, leaving the roach in charge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 339

You deserved it 477

By andrea99 - 03/10/2010 09:35 - United States

Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 663

You deserved it 3 416

By jaqlove - 02/07/2016 20:28 - United States - Clementon

Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 028

You deserved it 2 643

By ferrarismyname - 09/04/2009 06:40 - United States

Today, I was sitting shotgun in the car. A huge bug came inside, and everyone began to freak out so naturally I began to swat at it. I got the fly, but I also cracked the windshield. I paid $229 to kill a bug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 565

You deserved it 23 514

By Anonymous - 27/07/2014 18:44 - Germany - Oberursel

Today, I woke up to a huge, disgusting bug next to my bed. As I tried to squish it, it suddenly flew off at high speed. Now I'm lying in bed, awake and terrified because I can hear it buzzing around but can't see it anywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 713

You deserved it 5 390

By penny-dropping - 16/04/2012 04:24 - United States

Today, while packing my luggage from vacation I thought I saw a penny drop into my bag. After looking everywhere I couldn't find it. Now that I am home I found out that I had mistaken a cockroach for a penny. I now have a family of cockroaches living in my luggage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 419

You deserved it 3 141

Clever

By FMLTIMESTWO - 10/06/2009 04:36 - United States

Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 557

You deserved it 61 972

By no name - 22/02/2011 12:25

Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 963

You deserved it 4 787

ComoEsJuan 24

Wednesday 6 August 2014 19:11

It now owns your car, sorry.

riddle143 15

Wednesday 6 August 2014 19:11

Well crap... Time to burn that car

Comments

andyeatsworld 10

Wednesday 6 August 2014 19:49

It was an inside job. Hope you don't have to many enemies OP.

zbursach 7

Wednesday 6 August 2014 19:52

so you stopped to post this...?

rocker_chick23 27

Wednesday 6 August 2014 20:06

Every FML starts with today. For all we know it could have happened a year ago, or he could have written it when he got home.

yeongji 31

Wednesday 6 August 2014 20:14

I would have turned off the car to make sure the lights don't attract more bugs, and from there, keep the windows (or even some of the doors) opened in hope that it will be smart enough to free itself to freedom.

ilokajkid1369 6

Wednesday 6 August 2014 22:57

roaches get scared by light. so if he would have turned the light on it would have kept the roach away from him

ostfaiz 18

Wednesday 6 August 2014 20:19

what are you wearing by the way ;)

ostfaiz 18

Thursday 7 August 2014 19:20

ethan_unoxx 29

Wednesday 6 August 2014 20:22

open your window or get the bug spray ready

clemsi 20

Wednesday 6 August 2014 22:39

Bug spray would just make it stronger

ImRJ 7

Wednesday 6 August 2014 20:23

Just call truce. who knows, it may agree and leave

SofiaM0517 8

Wednesday 6 August 2014 20:43

I WOULD FAINT IN THAT SITUATION

JoshMohawk 11

Wednesday 6 August 2014 20:53

Jesus... Suck it up. Roaches don't bite/sting/stab/pinch. It can't hurt you. Stop being a little bitch.

Futacy 29

Wednesday 6 August 2014 21:02

OP lives in Australia though...

Thorzix 23

Wednesday 6 August 2014 21:57

Pretend? Entomophobia is a real thing fool.

sem2183 13

Wednesday 6 August 2014 22:57

Some people have legitimate phobias of bugs! You're the one acting like a bitch here so shut up.

Futacy 29

Wednesday 6 August 2014 21:01

And you live in Australia too? Yup, your car's gone. Better set it afloat to sea before it escapes and lays its eggs in your retina. It's the only way to be sure.