Love, Awkward and Cringe post: Cursed - FML

Cursed

By Anonymous - 02/10/2010 13:12 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I was at the beach with my parents. They were walking hand in hand, when they spotted a crab. My Dad turned to my Mum and said, "Oh, must've crawled out of my pubes!" they both laughed and kissed. I don't think they realized I was within hearing distance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 936

You deserved it 3 868

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/06/2012 22:04 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 397

You deserved it 2 300

screaming intensifies

By Thalassophobic - 21/07/2009 05:32 - United States

Today, I went to the beach. I was in the ocean and I looked over my shoulder and saw a big black spot. Knowing that there were big crabs on the beach, I screamed. Everyone in the water heard including the lifeguards. It turns out it was just my shadow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 704

You deserved it 52 044

By Anonymous - 24/01/2015 14:33 - United States - Canyon Country

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my mom blow-drying my grinning dad's pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 282

You deserved it 4 579

By Anonymous - 01/07/2012 04:22

Spicy

Today, I went to the beach with my boyfriend and family. My sister coyly pointed out the scratch marks down his back, hoping to embarrass me in front of my parents. The marks weren't from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 179

You deserved it 2 373

Weird flex, but OK

By gotmon3y - 07/04/2009 16:12 - United States

Today, I was at the beach walking on the boardwalk without a shirt on. Two cute girls are walking my way and I decide to try and impress them by flexing my abs. While I flexed them, I accidentally let a fart out that everyone heard. Everybody, including the girls, laughed hysterically at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 936

You deserved it 81 861

By Bear - 01/02/2009 17:38 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my Mum and Dad having sex and didn't even realize what they were doing until she shouted at him to go harder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 439

You deserved it 6 000

By combo - 28/02/2010 09:12 - France

Today, I was chatting with my boyfriend and his mates barefoot on the grass. I suddenly felt something flick across my feet, so I let out a startled scream. Turns out it was my toe hairs rustling in the breeze. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 977

You deserved it 27 541

By rindawg - 20/01/2009 03:55 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend took me out to a nice seafood dinner where we had some great crab legs. Later tonight we drove down to the beach and started messing around. He started touching me... with his hands still covered in salty crab juice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 107

You deserved it 7 145

Cheeky

By Anonymous - 29/08/2009 04:10 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower outside at my fiancé's beach house. I was struggling to take my bikini bottoms off, so I started to walk backwards to step out of it. Little did I know that I had pushed the door open. My fiancé, his family, and my family all saw me bend over naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 577

You deserved it 8 624

This is wrong

By WTF - 05/09/2009 22:11 - United States

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 781

You deserved it 3 429

Next

Top comments

illmatic2 16

Saturday 2 October 2010 19:33

I hate it when parents say gross stuff like that.

airball33 0

Saturday 2 October 2010 19:34

Hahahaha that awesome at least they have a sense of humor

Comments

emo_devon 11

Saturday 2 October 2010 22:54

XD! your parents are hilarious. I would love to talk to them

garza559 0

Saturday 2 October 2010 22:59

your dads a beast

OceanMinded 0

Saturday 2 October 2010 23:03

wow.. kinda strange for a kid to hear! parents sound sweet tho!

netbeui435 3

Saturday 2 October 2010 23:07

not everything is about you.

Im_Russia 0

Saturday 2 October 2010 23:07

in Russia pubes crawl out crabs

theycallmeMimi 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 2:14

WIN.

DarkHelmet 10

Saturday 2 October 2010 23:12

hahahahahahahaha your Dad has crabs

proski 0

Saturday 2 October 2010 23:15

sucks

Domonator 16

Saturday 2 October 2010 23:28

I agree with you, Sweet Candy...

Britney_0 0

Saturday 2 October 2010 23:32

Are they crazy?

40ozToFreedom 0

Saturday 2 October 2010 23:33

how is this a FML? your dad sounds funny as shit

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Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Gross Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Ironic Argument Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Relatable Cars Work You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids Family DIY Cats Sex Roommate Am I overreacting? Intimacy Management

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You deserved it 39 590

The Top

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You deserved it 5 146

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I agree, your life sucks 311

You deserved it 254

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I agree, your life sucks 52 615

You deserved it 3 635

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I agree, your life sucks 3 798

You deserved it 517

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I agree, your life sucks 48 142

You deserved it 3 713

Today, at work, a customer was staring at me for a long time. Hoping to break the awkwardness, I asked him what brought him to the store today. He complimented me on my friendly demeanor, then followed up with, "Since you're so friendly, how about coming in the bathroom with me and giving me a hand?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 389

You deserved it 396