Tell him you want him to be more involved and to help you out or else you will leave him and take the kids with you.

OP, just a reminder - We are all affected by the pandemic. That forces us to spend more time than usual around our spouse, family, kids. That can stress people out. Even people who are happy together need breaks from each other from time to time. Ask yourself was your spouse always so annoying or whatever to you or did this observation start with the pandemic and quarantine and business shutdowns and working at home? If the honest truth is the latter try to figure out how much of this is displaced frustration from the pandemic and how much is a real problem with your spouse. Secondly you need to honestly figure out if you are better off with your spouse or without him. Bear in mind that in the current pandemic getting a job that allows you to be self supporting is more difficult now. If you are not working and expect your possibly soon to be ex to financially support you and the kids you are going to need an adjustment to your expectations. Most states expect both spouses to be at least partially self supporting and both are expected to provide financial support for their kids. It’s not the 1950’s - thank goodness! OP, try talking to your spouse in a non-confrontational way about how you feel. He deserves to know how you feel and he may be dealing with his own frustrations too, you know. If there’s not a really serious problem you should try to work on fixing the relationship if practical before looking for an exit. Some things once said or done cannot be taken back.