Money and Health: Going out of business? It's a matter of life and death! - FML

Going out of business? It's a matter of life and death!

By Prepper? - 06/12/2017 01:30

Today, the accredited funeral home of my memorial plan is going out of business. Instead of delegating my policy to a different firm, they gave me the package. I now have to take home a land title for where I will be buried, my own coffin, and my headstone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 878

You deserved it 317

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Same thing different taste

By KathleenSchuler - 05/03/2013 03:38 - United States

Today, I took a week off work because my father passed away. I was at the funeral home making arrangements when I overheard the owners complaining about how their insurance agent had left them to fend for themselves. I'm their insurance agent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 171

You deserved it 3 597

By Anonymous - 04/11/2010 06:41 - United States

Today, I called a guy who had requested a free marketing consultation for his funeral home through the internet a couple of days ago. When I got through, the receptionist seemed a little taken back by me wanting to talk to him. He had died and was buried yesterday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 514

You deserved it 2 640

Need help

By onwardsandupwards - 21/01/2020 14:00

Today, I went to the cemetery to visit a friend. As I was looking for his burial plot, I fell into a dug out grave and had to call my partner to come help me get out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 019

You deserved it 465

Can't get any lower

By McNuggetsMcQueen - 30/11/2023 18:00 - United States - Lake Wales

Today, I attended my mom's funeral, who was the only person who ever truly supported me. During the funeral, the cemetery representative told me he was sure the hole was dug to specification, while at the same moment the casket got caught on the ground and tipped, dropping her 6ft down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 655

You deserved it 105

Grave error

By spyrogers1677 - 18/11/2022 00:00 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, at my job as a funeral director, I fell ass over heels into the grave in front of a hundred mourners and an unamused Catholic priest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 923

You deserved it 154

The future is bleak

By Anonymous - 12/03/2022 10:00

Today, I just bought my own house after divorcing my wife of 30 years. We'd been childless by her choice, and as I stood in my new living room, looking at the emptiness, I couldn’t help the feeling I just bought a 2-storey, £125,000 coffin that I’ll one day die alone and be buried in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 088

You deserved it 315

By Anonymous - 13/08/2009 23:29 - Canada

Today, I found out that 15 years ago my father threw out my college acceptance letters so that I could stay home and take over the family's funeral home business. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95 809

You deserved it 3 453

By sicufovoshxbsjdk - 07/08/2010 02:22 - United States

Today, my grandma bought me a cemetery plot for my birthday. If that's not weird enough, it's about a two-minute walk from where the rest of my family will be buried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 317

You deserved it 2 621

Watch your step

By Anonymous - 14/01/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I have now reached the point in the financial landslide of my life that the only thing of value I have managed to hold on to is my life insurance policy, which I just manage to pay for every month. It says something that I am now actually worth more dead than alive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 470

You deserved it 94

Every little helps

By Anonymous - 21/04/2020 17:00

Today, I found out that my grandmother desecrated my grandfather's grave. 14 years after his death, she dug up his body and had him cremated so that she could sell his plot back to the cemetery for money. I was the one who found out so I had to tell the rest of the family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 920

You deserved it 222

Next

Top comments

Leeono 26

Friday 1 December 2017 8:39

Sounds like a grave mistake and I’m dead serious when I say you should dig up more info on what you can do.

rattyrayvn 21

Wednesday 6 December 2017 2:01

Just leave them lying around for when you bring dates home. Goths will love it.

Comments

dexter420 21

Tuesday 12 December 2017 8:26

That will save so much money. Have the service at your house and have a nice setup in the back yard with a cook out!

wrenavery90 12

Tuesday 11 October 2022 3:03

I'd love to know how old you are.

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The Top

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 499

You deserved it 64

Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 487

You deserved it 38 932

The Top

Today, thanks to some asshole with a padlock, I got trapped in porta potty for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 840

You deserved it 2 839

Today, the only girl who seems semi-interested in me is my ex-girlfriend, who bails out every time we make plans to meet up. I deserve to be treated better, but better wants nothing to do with me. Genuinely kind girls tell I'm too short, or assume I have ulterior motives. I hate hookups and dating in your twenties. FML

I agree, your life sucks 729

You deserved it 258

Today, I went to see a dinosaur exhibition with my mum. We walked around and saw a huge dinosaur, made of plastic and rubber. She was very disappointed, saying that she thought there would be real live dinosaurs for us to see. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 640

You deserved it 2 692

Today, this girl who has been stalking me for almost 7 months sent me a 12 page text comparing her love for me with her passion for cheese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 349

You deserved it 3 683

Today, my boyfriend is seriously mad at me for telling his cat what he got it for Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 979

You deserved it 8 985

Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 609

You deserved it 5 547