Marriage and Love: Hello, goodbye

Hello, goodbye

By Joey - 07/05/2009 22:39 - United States

Today, my wife of three years asked me to meet her for lunch at Subway. When I arrived, she was standing in the parking lot. She handed me a footlong sub, said "I got you a turkey sandwich" and followed it up with "And I'm leaving you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 96 157

You deserved it 5 244

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Richie - 20/05/2009 05:37 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were buying Subway. When it came to ring up the order the lady asked us together or separate? My girlfriend looked and said separate. Half-jokingly, I asked if it was some sort of hint. She looked at me and said yes. I got broken up over a 12-inch ham sub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 193

You deserved it 4 668

By DMitch - 15/05/2011 19:29 - United States

Today, I went to Subway with my girlfriend. Just as the time came for her to pay, she went to the car to grab her purse. She didn't come back. I found a note on the windshield saying, "It's over." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 882

You deserved it 14 453

Premature

By Anonymous - 04/09/2022 19:00 - United States - Paris

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me at dinner, which would’ve been nice if we hadn’t been dating for only two months, and dinner was at Subway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 231

You deserved it 156

By Anonymous - 01/03/2013 07:18 - United States - American Canyon

Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 705

You deserved it 7 409

By neverunderstood - 02/12/2016 12:39 - Italy - San Pietro In Casale

Today, my wife suddenly texted me to meet her halfway beetween our house and the supermarket. I immediately put my shoes on and started walking eager to get to her as fast as I could to surprise her. Turns out she was carrying three heavy bags and yelled at me for being slow and by foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 433

You deserved it 1 426

Flustration

By Anonymous - 19/03/2023 18:00

Today, I got flustered by the gorgeous sandwich artist at Subway and ordered a “meat-long foot-ball.” On Rye of course. FML

I agree, your life sucks 629

You deserved it 254

By Anonymous - 07/07/2009 23:04 - United States

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 3 years. I got reservations for a romantic dinner, and at the end, fireworks would spell out my proposal. The whole thing had taken weeks to plan out and had cost me a lot of money. She proposed to me at a subway station first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 865

You deserved it 9 017

By salad - 28/04/2014 15:38 - United States - North Charleston

Today, I took my girlfriend out for lunch, and I asked her if I could have a bite of her meal. She took it to mean I was calling her fat, and stormed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 951

You deserved it 5 323

By mista_sandy - 11/04/2012 16:54 - Canada - Toronto

Today, a guy asked me out and said he was going to take me to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you. I love Japanese food, so I was really excited. We went to Subway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 649

You deserved it 5 792

Get back here!

By matte - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, whilst working at Subway, I took an order for 6 footlongs. The entire process took 15 minutes due to the customer's hesitant and glacial pace. When it came to paying, he pulled out his wallet, looked inside, looked at me, and walked quickly out of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93 962

You deserved it 4 980

theluckygirl28 8

Friday 8 May 2009 2:02

OUCHH!!! But hey, at least you got a footlong.... or maybe you don't and that's why she's leaving you? Think about it... All kidding set aside, FYL

AngelRaven89 0

Friday 8 May 2009 2:05

Could have been worse. She could have ended things without giving you a turkey sandwich. And then where would you be!

Comments

keith444 0

Friday 8 May 2009 3:49

i guess it couldnt have meant that much to you if your writting about it on hear the day of. was the sub good???? you should have been like these are the only two footlongs you will ever have again

Moomoomoo_fml 0

Friday 8 May 2009 3:52

best subway pickup line ever: "will you grease my footlong with mayonnaise?"

pkmlove 0

Friday 8 May 2009 3:58

hahahaha # 59 and 74! #25 that is degrading to women, however heartless they may be. I'm soooooo sorry. She is a bitch

jessiexx12 0

Friday 8 May 2009 4:03

#3 hahahhaaa that made me laugh

99Rage 0

Friday 8 May 2009 4:04

Haha, don't worry about my man. Tonnnnsssss of women out there waiting for a divorced man to please em. Free sub though?, aiight deal. Just laugh it off, check out the single honeys & live man. Best wishes,

Amkii 0

Friday 8 May 2009 4:11

Let's face it: that is a delicious way to break up with someone.

makeitglow 0

Friday 8 May 2009 4:12

lolllllllllllll 50. but seriously? what did you do to provoke this ?!

acerock 0

Friday 8 May 2009 4:15

Hey, break-ups are hard. Subway now presents "the Heartbreak Turkey Sub." Say "I'm not willing to spend more than five dollars on you. AND I don't love you." In one delicious, convenient package! Errr.. but seriously. I'm so sorry that happened! That is a real bitch move, I can't imagine that she was terribly pleasant to be with for three years. You may well be better off.