Depression, Sextoys and Intimacy: It's the thought that counts, right? - FML

It's the thought that counts, right?

By kdmoney - 23/09/2011 06:16 - United States

Spicy

Today, my mother said I'm slipping too deep into depression since my boyfriend left for college in Fresno. Her solution? Buying me a vibrator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 301

You deserved it 7 562

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Same thing different taste

By Sarah - 25/08/2009 16:04 - United Kingdom

Today, my mother was cleaning out my underwear drawer and found my vibrator. Everytime I see her in the hall, she just cracks up and makes jokes about how I can't get a guy, so I have to rely on electronics. What's worse, she told my dad AND posted a status on facebook about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 650

You deserved it 10 420

Sharing is caring

By Can't Unsee - 25/08/2018 22:00

Spicy

Today, my mother found my sex toys. To make me "feel better" she showed me hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 176

You deserved it 575

By Mygawdwhy - 21/01/2018 01:30

Today, I gave my mom an extra pillow since the ones in the guest room were too flat and hurt her neck. Hours later, I remembered that I'd stashed my vibrator in that pillowcase during a romantic camping trip with my husband. She found it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 187

You deserved it 2 060

By Ab - 10/02/2009 01:50 - United States

Spicy

Today, I ran out of underwear and so I went into my mom's drawer to borrow a pair from her. It was then that I found out my mom uses the same vibrator as I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 321

You deserved it 42 804

By wet dreams - 12/02/2016 17:46 - United States - Cartersville

Spicy

Today, I came to the realization that I dream more about my vibrator than I do about my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 986

You deserved it 4 570

By Anonymous - 28/04/2015 16:58 - United Kingdom - Exminster

Spicy

Today, after assuming I'd been scammed, I finally found the vibrator I ordered over 2 months ago. It was in my mom's bedside cabinet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 807

You deserved it 4 442

By Noname - 13/03/2009 23:04 - United States

Today, I needed money to go to the movie. I asked my mom if I could reach in her purse and grab a few bucks. When I opened up her purse her phone started to vibrate. I yelled over to my mom that her phone was ringing. She said the phone was next to her. I looked in the purse. It was a vibrator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 304

You deserved it 5 341

By Anonymous - 27/11/2010 05:57 - Australia

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend confessed that he felt so insecure he submerged my $80 vibrator in water to eliminate the competition. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 314

You deserved it 15 556

By ToysforHire - 22/09/2018 03:00

Spicy

Today, I found out that my girlfriend secretly purchased a vibrator and has been using it for the past two weeks. When I confronted her, her only argument was "It's made me cum more times than you could." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 536

You deserved it 7 838

Kinda cute

By anon - 09/09/2013 15:15 - United States - Mantua

Spicy

Today, I woke up and found $30 slipped under my door with a note that read, "Please buy yourself a quieter vibrator. - Mom and Dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 408

You deserved it 26 009

Next

Top comments

chell1894 13

Friday 23 September 2011 12:15

I like it!

saIty 17

Friday 23 September 2011 12:19

Just stick a picture of him on your little friend. Use it well young Jedi.

Comments

justanotherhuman 21

Saturday 24 September 2011 7:24

Dear OP, ...I am *so very* with you on this. No matter how cool the parent or relationship with said parent, being handed a sex-toy by one is always just... a terrible, terrible line. I imagine that the closest to Catholic Sex Guilt I could ever feel would be the result of having used a sex toy I received from one of my parents. /shudder FYL.

BadAssDerbyGirl 0

Saturday 24 September 2011 8:09

I wish my mom was that cool!

StrongDrinks 0

Saturday 24 September 2011 8:31

I wish my mom was like that instead she's a crazy physo bitch

cutie_pie257 0

Saturday 24 September 2011 10:18

I live around fresno

arak_fml 7

Saturday 24 September 2011 10:18

I'm from Fresno. Just throwing that out there. :]

WickedPixie 0

Saturday 24 September 2011 10:25

Well that was nice of her!

chickenpie90 16

Saturday 24 September 2011 11:46

Omg I feel sorry for you

peaceoutdude 0

Saturday 24 September 2011 13:51

fun

buckmeow 4

Saturday 24 September 2011 19:20

"Slipping too deep" eh?

anvilz 0

Saturday 24 September 2011 19:25

Mine would have tried to get me to go to some "group event" or something. Your mom's making a try lol

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Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Snow Weather Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, while driving with my family, the car got stuck in a large patch of mud. My family of seven decided that I, the fifteen year old girl, would be best suited to push it out. After slipping, falling, and getting completely covered in mud, they finally called a tow truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 255

You deserved it 3 821

Today, I told my roommate that I was an atheist and she laughed. I left and returned to find her and her prayer group praying for my soul. She told me to accept Jesus Christ as my lord and savior. I said no. Then she told me to find somewhere else to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 852

You deserved it 1 042

The Top

Today, after doing it with my girlfriend, she told me that she was "faking the whole time, and thinking of talking cupcakes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 753

You deserved it 8 183

Today, I wanted to take a nap after cleaning my apartment, so I put the trash outside the front door and put a note on the door for my roommate, saying, "Please take the trash out when you leave for work." When I woke up, the note was gone but the trash was still there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 380

You deserved it 1 991

Today, I went shopping for a nice outfit to wear for a job interview. A fake job interview. One that I just made up so my mother would get off my case about finding a job. I don't know which is sadder, the fact that I can't get a job, or that my mother actually believed me about the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 205

You deserved it 38 890

Today, I made a joke that my boyfriend was going to end up sending me into premature labor. Later, I went into labor for real. My boyfriend thought I was faking and refused to take me to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 765

You deserved it 8 355

Today, the weather was nice, so I went for a ride on my motorbike. I sneezed inside my helmet. Full-face helmet, might I add. FML

I agree, your life sucks 573

You deserved it 83

Today, on my wife's and my 30th wedding anniversary, my dad once again told me the "honeymoon phase" won't last and soon we'll begin hating each other, and fighting all the time. Dad, it's been thirty fucking years and we're still very in love. Just admit you and mom had a shitty relationship and leave us alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 565

You deserved it 118