Miscellaneous: Jesus freak

Jesus freak

By Max Flynn - 20/05/2011 10:07

Today, while driving, a minivan cut me off. Pissed, I started honking and cursing. I then went ballistic when the driver waved out the window, smiling. It wasn't until I was at a stoplight that I noticed their "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 403

You deserved it 15 734

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Same thing different taste

Y'all need Jesus

By TNDriver - 16/07/2013 13:12 - United States - Jackson

Today, I was about to make a left turn. In the turn lane a little old lady was waiting for the light to change. On the back of her car was a bumper sticker that said, "Honk if you love Jesus!" I gave her a honk and waved. She leaned out and yelled, "The light's red, asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 123

You deserved it 15 093

Mean streets

By fouchi - 10/04/2024 07:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was driving when a couple flipped the bird on me before cutting me off, so I flipped them off back. After they'd got away, another driver thought I'd actually been flipping him off and followed me into a parking lot. This guy was huge, and let’s just say he didn’t give me a chance to explain myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 339

By AmberKCole - 08/07/2009 18:45 - United States

Today, the car in front of me was going slow and I flashed my lights and honked. I floored it and passed the car, flipping off the driver. Just as I went around the next corner I got pulled over by a motorcycle cop. A few seconds later, the guy I flipped off drove by honked and waved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 545

You deserved it 100 542

Coming through!

By Fender bender - 10/09/2022 05:30 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I was driving around a parking lot, looking for an empty spot. Someone was backing out a bit too quickly as I was about to pass by, so I honked to announce myself. The driver instead panicked and reversed into my front bumper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 857

You deserved it 233

By k…… - 09/06/2012 21:35 - United Kingdom - Telford

Today, while driving home from work, I noticed the driver next to me was happily chatting on her phone. I fucking despise these would-be murderers, so I slammed my horn to signal my disgust. She panicked and swerved straight into my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 560

You deserved it 64 570

Unwarranted bitchiness

By lois2lane - 23/12/2009 07:15 - United States

Today, a car was tailgating and honking at me while trying to pass me, so I decided to be a bitch back and go extremely slow. We got to a two lane road and the car passed me up. The man in the front seat flipped me off while pointing to his wife in the back seat who was clearly in labor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 019

You deserved it 68 185

Karma

By Justwantedathankyou - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United States - Loudon

Today, I noticed that an SUV forgot to put their gas cap back on, so I tried honking and flashing my lights to get their attention. They slammed on their brakes, causing me to rear-end them. So much for good karma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 892

You deserved it 1 555

By agstadra - 08/12/2010 15:24 - Canada

Today, I was sitting in a parked car. A woman was having difficulties maneuvering out. She honked the horn repeatedly for me to move, then looked me in the eye and called me a "f**king bitch", before driving off. I was in the passenger seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 987

You deserved it 3 204

By Zeco - 05/02/2011 22:54 - United States

Today, I was driving to work when I was almost hit by a teenage driver. I gave her the finger and shouted "F*** you!" making sure that she heard me. I then saw my boss glaring at me from the passenger seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 233

You deserved it 42 181

By Tom Ali - 10/01/2012 20:50 - United States

Today, while driving to my girlfriend's house, I passed up a stop sign without stopping. A car passing by honked. I honked back several times and flipped them the finger. Turns out it was my girlfriend's dad trying to say hi. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 212

You deserved it 65 149

vatechrules1 0

Friday 20 May 2011 15:56

haha at least it wasn't a pedophile with a honk if you're horny

Jellybean2705 0

Friday 20 May 2011 15:56

I really don't think anyone would take the time to look at bumper stickers after being cut off.

Comments

cupcakeslayer 0

Friday 20 May 2011 17:10

I can't stop laughing. maybe the van driver knows s/he's a bad driver and instead of trying to improve skill bought that bumper sticker for such occasions.

Badshah29 6

Friday 20 May 2011 17:22

so u honked 4 loving jesus, wats da FML about dat??? Even we muslims love jesus :p

mrjude 3

Friday 20 May 2011 17:23

Cool story bro.

ThanksKarma 0

Friday 20 May 2011 17:27

God was playing a funny little trick on you. I heard him laughing. He's a hardcore.

SteelCladAngel 0

Friday 20 May 2011 17:28

op...you need to ******* chill Jesus Christ so someone cut you off...it's annoying, but not enough to lay on the horn....

Smilez12 0

Friday 20 May 2011 17:33

L M F A O ! xD

armorf0r 7

Friday 20 May 2011 17:34

I bet you anything that this person is just a horrible driver, and this exact situation happens to him every single day, and all he can think of is "man a lot of people love Jesus!"

blake4months 0

Friday 20 May 2011 17:34

okay... road rage is just stupid, someone cut you off... oh dear god you might not get to where your going oh no!

ReynshineCutting 10

Friday 20 May 2011 17:37

It's legit to lay on your horn if someone cuts you off an you have to slam on your breaks. That says "hey asshole, watch where you're going" If they just cut you off and you don't have to hit the breaks, there's no reason to. If you didn't have to hit your breaks, just get in front of them and drive 2 under the speed limit.