Miscellaneous: Jumpy

Jumpy

By Chelsea - 21/04/2009 05:20 - United States

Today, my mom made me clean. I was dusting in the living room and heard gunshots outside the apartment. I dove on the floor and started crying and screaming. My mom walked in and informed me that the sound was her making popcorn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 694

You deserved it 71 092

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By almost_a_pro - 23/04/2015 13:43 - Brazil - Rio De Janeiro

Today, I was home alone and tried to make some popcorn so I could watch a movie. Thirty minutes later, my parents came home and found me talking to the firemen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 098

You deserved it 9 088

Catching strays

By Anonymous - 04/06/2024 13:00 - United States - St Louis

Today, I heard something that sounded like a series of gunshots outside my house. My Dad screamed, "Get down!" at the top of his lungs. The whole family immediately dropped to the floor, my sister whimpering and trembling, only moments later to hear my Dad cackling uncontrollably over us. They were just fireworks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 98

Nice…

By MexyBoy - 11/06/2019 16:08

Today, I wanted to do something nice for my mom. So, while she was sleeping, I cleaned the whole house for her and even made her breakfast. A few minutes later, she came downstairs and yelled at me to keep it down because she was trying to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 893

You deserved it 302

By frenchpop1960 - 23/02/2009 21:58 - United States

Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house and I heard a strange sound. I laughed and said, "It sounds like a dog throwing up!" He listened for a second and said "That's my mom crying downstairs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 374

You deserved it 41 852

Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

By Anonymous - 06/09/2019 20:03

Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 508

You deserved it 181

By We're still popping them - 27/02/2015 00:35 - United States - Fremont

Today, the neighbors called the cops because they heard "gun shots". My girlfriend and I were popping bubble wrap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 670

You deserved it 2 879

Private freakout

By emmy - 03/06/2022 00:00

Today, the neighbors called the cops on us because they heard a series of loud screams. No, no one was being murdered, but my mom found one of my socks in the laundry room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 863

You deserved it 193

By Dx - 06/03/2011 07:18 - United States

Today, I was babysitting for my usual. After putting the baby to sleep I put some popcorn in the microwave and went to the bathroom. When I came out the whole kitchen was filled with smoke. One of the neighbors saw and called 911. I'm out of a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 235

You deserved it 34 895

I am hungry

By Hungry - 23/12/2019 01:00

Today, I thought my mother was coming into my room to give me lunch. She gave me cleaning supplies instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 652

You deserved it 3 162

By leastitwasntsurpriseanal - 22/08/2014 20:26 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I woke up to a blood-curdling scream from the living room. I jumped up and went running, only to find out it was my mother, who'd screamed at some dramatic plot twist in a Sex and the City episode. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 382

You deserved it 3 504

shaBAMalex 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:04

Calm down. Lol.

nomadxx7 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:05

Gunshots =/= popcorn Come out the country. I'll show you what gunshots sound like

Comments

xalexrulesx 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 0:16

WOW, U WIERDO. U MUST THINK THAT THE SOUND OF THE SINK RUNNING IS LIKE A ROARING WATERFALL. XD.

itsame123_fml 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 0:20

ouchh

yui567 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 0:22

wow, it's pretty hard to mistake popcorn for gunshots. i wouldn't wish PTSD on anyone, but if you don't have it you need to learn to relax.

KiwiBlu 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 0:38

Is that even possible? Popcorn...for gunshots.

KiwiBlu 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 0:40

Ahahaha, #27...

NGM_KID 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 1:02

#124 made me laugh for some reason :D if this is true, i can just imagine you screaming like a dumbass!!

Azwethinkweiz78 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 1:15

what would your father say to that

BrokenPsycho 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 1:21

Ummm ur an idiot nd i dont believe u cuz a gun shot iz like 20 times louder than pop corn

BrokenPsycho 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 1:23

nd to all the people saying move out of the ghetto she doesnt live there losers becausse she would no wat a gunshot sounds like

Kaileigh 6

Wednesday 22 April 2009 1:26

Something is wrong with you that you think popcorn sounds equal gunshots. Is this the first time you've ever heard popcorn pop? SERIOUSLY.

Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, my longtime crush, who turned me down because he’s “sick of women”, just got into a relationship. He made it Facebook official, with photos of them and everything. Wanting to even the score, I commented, “So it seems your sickness of women is cured, huh?” He bitched at me for “ruining his moment” and deleted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 111

You deserved it 1 029

Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 668

You deserved it 3 982

The Top

Today, after nearly three hours of watching the new Batman movie, I realized that the film was a waste of time and moments of my life that I will never get back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 344

You deserved it 1 049

Today, I found out the identity of the pervert who's been staring at me through my bedroom window in the late hours of the night. My parents and I decided to set out a trap for 'him' instead of reporting to our local cop. Turns out, we caught my 37 year-old neighbor in the act. He's the cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 371

You deserved it 2 816

Today, my boyfriend was making salsa and got jalepeno juice all over his mouth. A little bit later, he started going down me. He hadn't washed his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 066

You deserved it 5 900

Today, I got drunk and spewed all over my lounge room floor. My dog ate it up, also got drunk, and also eventually spewed on the floor too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 203

You deserved it 1 136

Today, my vegetarian girlfriend put some ghost pepper hot sauce on my steak to teach me a "lesson" about eating meat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 166

You deserved it 5 693

Today, my husband came home from the hospital after having painful surgery, so I decided to make him a nice big breakfast. As I was taking it up to him, I heard a message on the phone. It was from one of his nurses. She was accepting his offer of a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 287

You deserved it 85