Work: Lawman

Lawman

By Anonymous - 12/05/2009 18:29 - United States

Today, my boss in my police department told me to start enforcing the "No bikes on sidewalks" law, which we usually ignore. I pulled up behind the first person I saw riding a bike on a sidewalk and flashed my lights. It turned out to be a boy with Down's syndrome, who was so upset he cried and peed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 586

You deserved it 14 600

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Same thing different taste

By Andrew - 28/08/2011 22:37 - Ireland

Today, I started my shift as a cop, patrolling the streets on a bicycle. Everywhere I went, gangs of youths yelled stuff out at me, like "Bike twat", "Pig on wheels", "That's a girl's bike you muppet" and "Go on wanker, do a wheelie." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 346

You deserved it 8 614

By Anonymous - 24/12/2010 14:13 - United States

Today, as I was riding my bike, I saw a bunch of cute guys checking me out. Not paying attention, I then ran into a parked police car. Besides getting laughed at, I got a ticket for damaging police property. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 441

You deserved it 31 035

By kodijack - 25/01/2010 18:13 - United States

Today, I got stuck behind a guy riding his bike 20 mph below the speed limit. I honked, cursed, screamed, and yelled, before finally managing to overtake him. Once I got home, I went outside to get the paper, and discovered that the biker lives just two doors down from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 670

You deserved it 35 216

By Mick - 20/02/2009 08:29 - United States

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 864 326

You deserved it 94 913

By TooFast - 21/07/2019 02:00 - Australia - Mount Druitt

Today, after being promised a job and attending five full days of training and induction for a job as a bicycle delivery officer, I was denied the job at the very end of the last day for, "riding my bicycle too quickly on the road." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 862

You deserved it 173

By Chelsea - 27/02/2013 22:39 - United States - Aurora

Today, I walked outside to this guy attempting to steal my bike. When I asked him what he was doing he calmly replied, "I'm a bike inspector. You hooked your chain all wrong! This time is a warning; next time it'll be a ticket!" He then threw his full, opened Pepsi can at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 976

You deserved it 2 670

By Anonymous - 23/12/2016 09:19

Today, I saw a bike locked to a short bollard, making it very easy to steal. Being as nice as I am, I stayed, hoping the owner would come soon and no one else would take it. Then the guy who bullied me in highschool showed up, asked me what I was doing, laughed at me, took the bike, and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 248

You deserved it 1 240

By TheIrony - 19/07/2016 21:50 - United States

Today, while driving I saw a police car riding along next to me. Thinking about the news recently, I decided to give him a quick thumbs up and a smile to lighten up his day. He looks back, smiles, flips on his siren, and pulls me over for not paying attention to the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 182

You deserved it 3 543

BIKES!

By cwell88 - 21/06/2015 13:29

Today, my bike was stolen. These things happen, so I went to work. On my walk to work, a girl pulls up on my bike and says I needed to fix the brakes, someone could kill themselves. She hands the bike to me and runs off. Not even 3 minutes pass before police surrounded me and accused me of stealing my own bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 775

You deserved it 1 777

By Liz - 01/07/2009 17:41 - United States

Today, I took a bike ride to enjoy the weather and stopped for a break on the sidewalk of an overpass, taking in the view of the beautiful hills. I was approached by a cop, who said to me: "Ma'am, I know your life is crap right now, but I'm sure it'll get better. Please don't jump." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 444

You deserved it 5 250

P1MP1N 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 1:10

wow, that really sucks. its not your fault at all, how were you to know that the kid had down syndrome? You were just doing your job. Don't worry about it man

betsymonty 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 1:07

You shouldn't feel bad about enforcing the law, and you should definitely tell your boss what happened.

Comments

that_guy01 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 5:49

i'm pretty sure most places have no bikes on sidewalks rules, a bike is considered a vehicle more than a pedestrian. I know on campus legally we can't ride bikes on the sidewalks, but the rule's never enforced.

FBIWarning 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 6:01

you're not allowed to spit in public either...

erikawesome 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 6:08

:( Poor kid.

smarty_fml 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 6:11

**** THE POLICE!!! and that is why YDI

amykillswitch 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 6:13

poor kid. does this law apply everywhere? where the hell are you supposed to ride a bike at then? there is no such thing as a bike lane where i live.

ItecKid 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 6:16

Actually, many places in America you can not bike on side-walks, which is odd, because America is the only place in the world where it is also unsafe to bike on crowded streets..

ashbash92 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 6:18

Seriously, where else are they supposed to ride their bikes? Some laws are ridiculous. But, I would feel terrible! Haha.

mastershake 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 6:19

****** cops

pete275 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 6:35

you're an idiot. what do you gain from pulling over some kid (retarded or not) for some stupid law? do you expect children to be aware of the law? read the law books at the library? or are they supposed to hire a lawyer? if you don't want them on the sidewalks (because the streets and highways are so much safer for a kid riding a bike, right?) tell their parents, or go to their school and tell them. what's the point of scaring some kid? You and your boss are the retards.

vocaloid_01 11

Thursday 19 March 2015 3:29

1. How do you Know they didn't, maybe they did, and it's still happening 2. It's not like they choose which laws to Enforce, they have to Enforce all laws.

that_guy_you_are 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 6:40

Unfortunately, the suburbs don't have bike lanes, and any rode that goes anywhere is a 12-lane deathtrap. Even downtown, no-one has any respect for cyclists. Cars try to run you down, pedestrians won't get out of your way, and when you lock up it's almost a guarantee that someone will steal your bike, or even just your helmet, for no other reason than that they have an irrational hatred of cyclists. Show me one city in North America where cyclists are respected.