Miscellaneous: No cussing - FML

No cussing

By jdsksoapy - 30/03/2009 20:16 - United States

Today, my parents punished me and made me wash my mouth out with soap for cursing. I'm almost 19. I said the word "Hell". FML

I agree, your life sucks 211 174

You deserved it 35 023

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Proportional response

By Anonymous - 16/10/2020 16:58

Today, our house caught fire. While trying to help my mom get to safety, the word "fuck" accidentally escaped my mouth. Once we were safe, she said I was grounded for swearing. I'm 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 367

You deserved it 176

By libraries are a girl's best friend - 19/07/2013 21:53 - United States - Elizabethtown

Today, my dad grounded me for swearing, after I read a funny comment on Youtube to my sister. The supposed swear word? "YOLO." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 948

You deserved it 35 611

By siikman313 - 12/09/2011 21:37 - United States

Today, my mom put me in an anger management class because I said "crap." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 589

You deserved it 3 944

You OK hon?

By religiunatic - 13/12/2013 17:09 - Canada - Keswick

Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off". She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language". FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 821

You deserved it 3 128

By dadyoureacunt - 21/09/2013 13:10 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 520

You deserved it 7 463

Not your day, is it?

By hiheyaiden - 03/03/2022 23:00 - Hong Kong - Central District

Today, my mom kept swearing and punished me while I was in an online lesson. I almost got punished by the teacher as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 952

You deserved it 105

By properpissed - 03/06/2014 15:36 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was talking to one of my British friends online, and he told me to say "yew anchors" a few times really fast. I'm a fairly stupid person, and wasn't very focused, so I did as he said. When I finally figured what the words meant, my dad had heard and grounded me for cursing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 435

You deserved it 10 166

Holiday assumptions

By Red Toad - 26/12/2020 20:59 - United States - Litchfield Park

Today, I said a few words to my mom that happened to be similar to something offensive, and she misheard. I tried to tell her, but she was so angry that she assumed I was saying more offensive things. Now she is punishing everybody in the house, and I’m not allowed to speak to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 853

You deserved it 147

By not saying it was whores, but... - 16/10/2014 20:32 - United States

Today, I accidentally belched at the dinner table. At age 22, I got sent to my room with no dessert by my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 402

You deserved it 9 141

By minikat - 02/06/2018 15:00

Today, my parents woke me up and grounded me for the "disrespectful" things I said to them in my sleep. Apparently I say these things every night, and each time I do they extend the grounding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 111

You deserved it 267

Next

Top comments

SwordSlasher 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:09

Fail parents -_-

drimpossible 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:10

Try "Heck!" or if really moved "Fiddlesticks!"

Comments

Guairdean 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:32

If you're 19 and can't stand up for yourself, you deserved it. Grow a pair anrd let them know that there are limits to what you will tolerate. Either that, or resign yourself to being 12 years old and under their thumbs for the rest of your life.

artsci10 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:34

time to move out buddy if you're 19 and living there by choice, you've got no one to blame but yourself

PrincessesCrown 17

Friday 24 June 2011 0:31

Well my brother will be 18 today and is going to be going into his senior year. He has never flunked a grade he just started kindergarten late due to his summer birthday. So next summer he'll be 19 and just starting college so it could just be their summer before their first year if college.

blahblah17 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:36

hahaha. #8s idea!!!! it only makes sense!!!

nando92 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:36

wow and i curse at my parents all the time... well not bad things more like funny things and they laugh with me....

shaPOW 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:38

if you're 19, surely you know your parents strongly disapprove of cursing. i'm not saying it's reasonable of them, but shouldn't you know their rules by now?

gabeepicfails 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:46

kill your parents .

Why_Me77 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:47

My folks did that when I was little...that's when I discovered I was very allergic to Lever 2000 soap =(. Yay swollen mouth!

fuckedhislife 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:47

Wow. This sucks you have really up-tight parents/ Oh. I have been touched by his noodley appendage also

splat_fml 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:50

Hell is actually the name of a place close to the city I've been living in for quite a while. :D

122vanessa122 5

Tuesday 31 March 2009 1:51

lmfao. over protective muchh ? ;)

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird Dating AITA Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight

The Top

Today, I got into an argument with my boyfriend, who recently had to move away, about not calling me enough. Apparently his moving had meant that we were now taking a break, he just forgot to talk it over with me. He still wants to visit, and keep the relationship in bed alive though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 669

You deserved it 4 364

Today, my husband threw a bitch-fit and made passive aggressive remarks throughout the entire day. What did I do? Call him out on commenting an eggplant, peach, and winky face emoji under a female friend’s picture. He deactivated all social media accounts and shouted, “Are you happy now? I can’t talk to anyone now!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 566

You deserved it 96

The Top

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he said that I should go to the bathroom so we don't end up pregnant. When I asked why, he said that I need to "pee out the semen." I explained to him 5 times that I don't pee out of my vagina. He still doesn't get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 786

You deserved it 6 574

Today, I took the kids I'm babysitting to the farm to feed the animals. They were a little scared of the llama, so I showed them how nice it was by feeding it a lot of bread. Then, as I was telling the farmer how I loved the llama and wanted to take it home, it spit grass and bread all over my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 90

Today, I got called out of class to talk to some cops. Turns out my car was involved in a hit and run accident, while I was in school and there was no possible way it could have been me. But since they have no one else, it's my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 989

You deserved it 2 224

Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 561

You deserved it 63 138

Today, I was told by my best friend and roommate of 7 years that I’m a selfish asshole. Why? I won’t get over the fact that she’s dating my ex, who I was with for 10 years and had 3 kids with. We broke up because he proposed, and then cheated while she was in the house 3 days later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 300

You deserved it 225

Today, a third person in my husband's family made a comment insinuating that our children aren't my husband's. I have never cheated on him, they are 100% his, and look just like him. I'm not sure if they are joking and rude, or serious and stupid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 154

You deserved it 118