Intimacy: Observation - FML

Observation

By Anonymous - 17/04/2009 05:43 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 97 752

You deserved it 8 003

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Same thing different taste

Superfuzz Big Muff

By miiiiilk - 05/12/2010 11:12 - United States

Spicy

Today, as my boyfriend was about to go down on me, he held his breath and said, "I'm going in!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 655

You deserved it 9 534

By thisblows - 16/03/2011 16:50 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. I started to moan right when I was about to climax. He got worried, stopped and asked, "Are you okay?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 838

You deserved it 8 748

By Anonymous - 29/06/2010 17:34 - Canada

Spicy

Today, after going down on my boyfriend, we were cuddling and I went to kiss him. Just before I could reach his lips, he ran his finger over my mouth and whispered, "S-s-s-semen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 733

You deserved it 25 776

By BarbieKen - 14/06/2009 04:14 - United States

Spicy

Today, as my boyfriend and I were messing around in his room he took off my underwear. As he was about to go down on me I spread my legs to help out then he looked up at me and said, "You got some toilet paper left behind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 139

You deserved it 63 337

By anonymous - 04/11/2014 12:03 - Canada - North Vancouver

Spicy

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 243

You deserved it 8 494

By Anonymous - 30/09/2012 23:02 - United States - Rocky Point

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend doggy-style. I was getting close when he suddenly blurts out, "Babe, you really need to bleach your asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 963

You deserved it 5 657

By TooShortToCleanThat - 20/03/2015 03:22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to show off one of his favorite skills: Peeing on my ceiling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 459

You deserved it 3 752

By Anonymous - 07/06/2016 07:45

Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 898

You deserved it 1 238

By Anonymous - 07/12/2011 17:47 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky. He pulled off my panties and was about to go down on me when he said, "Wait, what's this white thing?" It was a piece of toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 881

You deserved it 20 680

By Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 306

You deserved it 2 763

Next

Top comments

AWESOM_E 0

Friday 17 April 2009 12:03

I wonder what he expected to see instead...?

hidude12 0

Friday 17 April 2009 12:03

woah anatomy... did he skip out on 4th grade health?

Comments

Nate1993 0

Friday 17 April 2009 19:45

WoW im 15 and i knew that this guy must really fail..

jewels_p 0

Friday 17 April 2009 20:25

LOL at #7! and i agree with the mapping things out for him...then maybe he can get his crayons and color in the map

hubabaluloo 0

Friday 17 April 2009 20:26

Clearly they are not ten if poster is posting this on this website.. Srsy. And it's fyi since she has a bf that has no common sense to realize that that is an observation left unsaid at that moment. x.x That's like a guy saying "You're ****** face looks funny" when you are in mid climax. No?

sarahthedeaf 0

Friday 17 April 2009 20:27

all I can think of regarding all these people saying "he said pee hole omg wtf luser" is the sound of "I think I see your urethra" just reminds me of a gynecologist. Give me pee hole any day.

HomeAl0ne 20

Tuesday 2 August 2011 6:48

Exactly! And the next logical step is seeing which one you squirt out of when you cum.

esushi 0

Friday 17 April 2009 20:29

#94--amen. Stop posting shit that didn't really **** your life, please, and thanks.

patray_angel 0

Friday 17 April 2009 20:32

You guys should really leave the OP alone......no one forced you to go on this website and read what she submitted. Is her life f'ed, not really, but this is still funny. I think if my husband were to have ever said something similar, it would kind of ruin the mood.

xClarkGable 0

Friday 17 April 2009 20:39

YDI. Gross.

kyhole 0

Friday 17 April 2009 20:45

lmfao that's funny as hell

AnaMaree 0

Friday 17 April 2009 20:47

I think I see an idiot. This isn't worthy of a FYL or YDI.

DoubleJG 0

Friday 17 April 2009 20:56

I'm typing this as I sit in my class, laughing. God bless the pee hole.

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I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 9

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 538

You deserved it 10 056

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Today, I started a new job as a receptionist at a nursing home. When two men came in saying, "We're here for Mr. Christensen," I paged him to come to the front desk. Apparently, these men had come from the funeral home to pick up Mr. Christensen's body. I was completely unaware that anyone had died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 089

You deserved it 1 647

Today, my new boyfriend is so scared of dogs that he won’t even go in the room where my new puppy's bed is, so even on the days when he’s at home not working, I still have to pay the lad next door to come round and let it into the garden for a pee, because he’s too scared to open the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 559

You deserved it 896

Today, my sugar daddy-turned-boyfriend can no longer support my lavish lifestyle and told me to get a job. Ever since he divorced his wife and kids for me, he has to pay a hefty child support and alimony for them. This is way more than I bargained for. Now I can’t break up with him or he’ll think I’m a gold digger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57

You deserved it 2 143

Today, I learned that my fiancée copied my house key early into our relationship. The reason being is that in case I were to catch her cheating, which I did, she could come in and trash my place when I called off the wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 488

You deserved it 139

Today, my dad came to my room to tell me he’s going to take a nap and didn't want to be disturbed. About 5 minutes later, my speaker started broadcasting the moaning voice of a woman clearly having sex. He's never borrowing my Bluetooth speaker ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 98

Today, while I took a short nap, my husband thought it would be a good idea to give our 9 month-old a shake with a whole milk base, despite being told several times he can’t digest it. Later, while we were out and about, he threw up. I rode home in the backseat with the baby, covered in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 942

You deserved it 143