Money, Plumbing and Work: Oh wow, thanks!

Oh wow, thanks!

By toast - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, I repaired a boiler for a wealthy guy in a big house. While there, I fixed a leaking tap for free. When I went to leave, the man slipped something into my shirt pocket and said, "Have a drink on me." When I got to my truck, I discovered that he'd given me a tea bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 392

You deserved it 6 391

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Use the force

By BlueMacaw - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Lake Elsinore

Today, I accidentally threw a glass of iced tea in my own face, because the restaurant I'd been going to for over a decade switched from heavy glass mugs to identical light-as-a-feather plastic mugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 438

You deserved it 4 697

Broke boyz

By ohno - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, due to "severe cuts to the budget" at work, I had to stir my coffee with a paperclip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 750

You deserved it 5 570

Rewind time

By supersmashpika - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Hershey

Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 670

You deserved it 9 995

Night on the tiles

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Ireland - Gorey

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to sneak out of work early and pay a little visit to the pub. I ended up staggering home, drunkenly making myself a nacho cheese dorito milkshake with the blender, then promptly puked my guts out all over the kitchen table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 983

You deserved it 46 606

Running late

By SMV - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - France

Today, my company was having a huge party so I went to work dressed in my best outfit. During lunch break, my boss said to me, "You really missed out on something yesterday, it was great fun!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 252

You deserved it 6 097

Say it, don't spray it

By ... - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I was on a train, sitting next to an old man who was reading a newspaper. Suddenly, he sneezed without putting his hands over his nose. Instead of turning towards the window, he turned towards me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 925

You deserved it 2 301

This is mine now

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I took my printer to work because the one in my office is broken. When I tried to leave, my boss stopped me and accused me of stealing it from the office. Nobody would believe me when I explained. Now my boss has a new printer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 229

You deserved it 6 803

People of Walmart

By drano - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, at work as a cashier, a guy came up with a cart full of stuff and it took me 10 minutes to ring it all up. When I told him his total, he felt his pockets, said, "Oh shit, I forgot my wallet!" and walked off. He left about 15 bags worth of things for me to put back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 509

You deserved it 3 384

Brain fog

By FlyingCoffeeMonster - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Oreland

Today, I was having my morning coffee while getting ready for work. I grabbed clothes off the floor to throw in the hamper. I accidentally threw my full coffee instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 062

You deserved it 3 219

jarofarts 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 23:16

lol who DOES that?

notsodelighted 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 23:19

ahahah, that's HILARIOUS!!

Comments

ohxberlin 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 0:20

LOL thats so ****** up, it's funny

Serial 2

Thursday 26 March 2009 0:20

that was uncalled for #40

vanityaffair 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 0:27

haha, that's fabulous.

Vehicle 1

Thursday 26 March 2009 0:30

That's tacky. But at least he has a sense of humor?

chaosleader0 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 0:31

he said have a drink on me never said what kind though thats ******* hilarious

MJ_Alexander 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 0:31

Recession hits!

azn_m16 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 0:31

Agree with #1, not really FML, but funny-ish.

OperationNicole_fml 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 0:31

Bahaha syke! #36: You're a fool, get educated.

Vidmantas 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 0:34

he has amazing sarcastic sence of humor that's for sure.

nowherefast_fml 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 0:39

hahahaha, i love it. im going to start carrying teabags around so when i go to a bar or whatever i can stick a teabag in their tip jar :)

Keywords

Transportation Cars Embarrassing Kids Awkward Parents Relatable Thanksgiving Thief Animals Dogs Argument Love Money Birthday Politics Health Family Frustration Intimacy Sex Parenting Work Allergies Miscellaneous AITA First Dates Road rage Cute Alcohol

The Top

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. After a few minutes of conversing, he told me he didn't need to give me a ticket. He then asked for a date. I politely declined. After staring at me for a very long moment, he said, "I think I'm going to have to give you that ticket after all." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 750

You deserved it 27 040

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams, the girl I've loved for 3 years. I went to her desk and surprised her with roses, chocolates, and played “All I Want for Christmas is You.” She said no. On top of that, she ate all the chocolates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 1 278

The Top

Today, I propositioned my boyfriend of two years to have sex with me in the shower to spice up our love life. He said that he was really busy. He was playing Call of Duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 007

You deserved it 6 065

Today, as a treat to myself for completing my exams, I dyed my hair rainbow. In the process of dyeing my hair, I managed to roll over my foot, causing severe ligament damage in my foot and ankle. It's likely I'll end up with a cast. Goodbye summer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 274

You deserved it 442

Today, I finished a painting I'd spent 3 weeks working on for an exhibition. When I came back from lunch, my cat was perched above it on my desk. He looked at me, then down at the painting, then jumped down onto it. He slipped and smeared the wet paint everywhere, ruining the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 674

You deserved it 6 244

Today, my boyfriend got so baked, he thought I was in the washing machine. I came downstairs to find him sitting in a puddle of soaking wet clothes, crying about where I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 032

You deserved it 3 035

Today, I arranged the food on my plate in a smiley face to try and make myself feel better. I'm a 38 year old man. It worked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 843

You deserved it 6 097

Today, my credit card got blocked. Apparently, my bank thinks buying a $130 flat iron online is suspicious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 798

You deserved it 6 014

Oh wow, thanks!

Same thing different taste

Use the force

Broke boyz

Sponsored by Popov

Rewind time

Night on the tiles

Running late

Say it, don't spray it

This is mine now

People of Walmart

Brain fog

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