Sex, Gross and Intimacy: Queasy

Queasy

By ohdeardarling - 14/06/2009 13:08 - United Kingdom

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house with a few people. I drank too much wine and later when everyone else had left I gave him head, deepthroating a little too enthusiastically, and puked all over his cock and bedsheets. Turns out, washing vomit out of your pubes kills the mood somewhat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 819

You deserved it 60 605

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Same thing different taste

My pleasure

By never again - 29/07/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, a bit buzzed, I finally gave in to my boyfriend's request and gave him a rimjob. I was licking away when I suddenly realized what I was doing, leapt off the bed, and ran to the toilet to puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153

You deserved it 549

By Foxy - 05/02/2009 14:06 - United States

Today, I had just gotten over the flu and thought I was better. So me and my boyfriend decided to have sex. As I was about to orgasm, I puked all over his face. He was so disgusted that he ended up throwing up on me as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 339

You deserved it 26 878

Big night

By mybad7 - 15/09/2009 08:13 - Australia

Today, I finally decided to sleep with my boyfriend. It was my first time and I was really nervous so when he was being all romantic with candles and wine I went a bit overboard and drank too much. I passed out. I woke up a few hours later, still a virgin, and in a puddle of my own piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 971

You deserved it 34 690

Kinky

By LaLa - 09/01/2012 05:01 - United States

Today, I was with my boyfriend, and we started to get a little kinky. He laid me down roughly on the bed, but I started to slide off, so I pulled myself up. In doing so, I managed to knee him in the nut-sack, causing him to puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 786

You deserved it 7 879

Sick sex, dude

By Anonymous - 18/01/2011 02:13 - United States

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. Right after, he left the room and went to the bathroom to throw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 497

You deserved it 5 227

By Toomuchisoutofcontrol - 21/01/2017 08:00

Today, I was going down on my boyfriend. I'm usually in control and do my own thing. He tried taking control and I ended throwing up on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 588

You deserved it 1 012

By theRoomie - 02/11/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, my loser roommate got wasted. He comes to me before going to bed, tells me he loves me, tries to hug me, then explosively vomits all over my face, my hair, my clothes. Then spends the rest of the night retching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 820

You deserved it 2 839

Is this the worst Netflix and chill ever?

By Anonymous - 15/08/2018 06:00

Today, a guy I'd been seeing briefly came over for cocktails and a movie. The night ended with him vomiting in my bathroom and on my couch, using my toothbrush, then proceeding to tell me how big his ex-boyfriend's dick was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 999

You deserved it 523

Strategic

By Anonymous - 07/06/2009 13:50 - South Africa

Today, I went to a huge party. My ex boyfriend was there who I still have feelings for, so I decided to make him jealous by making out with the really drunk guy next to me. While we were making out, he threw up in my mouth and all over me. Everybody found it hysterical including my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 764

You deserved it 95 437

It's just a flesh wound!

By manhandled - 01/02/2012 18:05 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 169

You deserved it 4 027

Sniggle 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 20:07

I don't think the washing of vomit is what killed the mood... unless your boyfriend is into that kind of thing O.o

SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 20:07

That's awkward. Guess you shouldn't deepthroat more than you can handle, hmm?

Comments

pinkducttape 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 21:21

#43 ecoeco777 - if a girl gets drunk and tries to pleasure her boyfriend she will get raped...i believe the correct answer is false.

Xx_Slayer_xX 22

Friday 1 April 2016 22:12

Are you stupid?

ohxberlin 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 21:21

who doesn't love vomit? better yet who doesn't love vomit all over their junk?! ydi, ya nasty

nprugby11 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 21:23

Well that's just wrong, at least he'll probably never ask you to give him head ever again...though you might want to prepare for a life of getting a nut busted in your eye

LesYeuxDeDario 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 21:31

Be happy idiot -. - means he dont have a microdick and he can satisfy you. And ... that fml is funny ; D

uSound 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 21:31

Not a *****, but that's so nasty.

zombina 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 21:32

I'm not entirely sure why the word ***** has come up so much, considering the word boyfriend was one of the key phrases in this FML.

seepaper 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 21:37

I totally feel for you.... A couple years ago I was blowing my boyfriend, and he grabbed my hair and started going too vigorously. I started to feel sick so I tried to pull away and ended up vomiting as he finished. (FML)

maggiewalters 17

Sunday 14 June 2009 21:41

wow you're disgusting

itspillzhaha 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 21:46

that happened 2 me. the girl got drunk, a threw up on me a few times. it does suck and it does kill the mood. i was able 2 deal with her throwin up on my pants, bt wen she threw up on my dick, tht killed it. :/