Transportation: Safety first

Safety first

By phlyingphuck - 31/08/2009 12:44 - United States

Today, my mother finally pressured me to wear my old helmet while riding my bike. Halfway through my ride, 3 spiders came crawling out of it and onto my face, causing me to lose control of the bike and crash head-first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 646

You deserved it 7 909

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Same thing different taste

By buttercup92 - 31/05/2016 03:45 - United States - San Antonio

Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 954

You deserved it 1 163

By broken - 02/09/2009 09:45 - Australia

Today, my mum hit me with her car as she was backing out of the driveway, hitting my leg, and crushing my bike. For the third time this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 397

You deserved it 10 238

Nature is harsh

By fallsdownplenty45 - 02/06/2009 11:08 - Taiwan

Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, my sock caught my chain and I flipped over my bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 932

You deserved it 6 758

BIKES

By ihpgolj - 18/06/2009 05:31 - United States

Today, I was riding my bike down a road I know is quite hazardous. Having almost been hit in the same spot the day before, I rode across the intersection very satisfied without having been injured. Until I crashed into the guy front of me and flipped over my handlebars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 876

You deserved it 43 976

By Anonymous - 07/03/2011 01:48 - United States

Today, a spider dangled an inch away from my face while I was driving. I freaked out and accidentally bumped the car in front of me. Three cops arrived on the scene and I had to explain to them what happened. I can still hear them laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 962

You deserved it 8 920

Tight

By Helmet - 20/10/2011 04:05 - United States

Today, I needed to buy a new crash helmet. I went to the motorbike shop and saw one I liked the look of. It was a bit of a tight fit, and I got my head stuck in it. I had to get the guy behind the counter to help me pull it off. My ears are still numb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 098

You deserved it 9 016

By hatesgravity - 02/09/2010 11:40 - United States

Today, after finally getting up the nerve to take my motorcycle to up 75mph on the freeway, I made it off in one piece, only to fall off my bike in the mall parking lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 929

You deserved it 25 618

By jodulieu - 02/09/2010 02:31 - France

Today, I fell off my bike. I grazed my knee, shin, thigh, hip, collar bone, shoulder and face. I also strained my wrist. As I was wheeling my bike away, I stung my other leg on nettles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 646

You deserved it 4 454

By abigiggles - 26/08/2018 22:00

Today, a spider came down from its web in front of my face. This would have been fine and I could have killed it easily if I wasn't in my car. Driving on the highway. I cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 419

You deserved it 333

By lumacsp - 08/10/2009 12:22 - United States

Today, I stopped at the light when someone crashed on to my motorcycle making me fall. The guy claimed it was my fault because I stopped too fast. I got really mad, so I attempted to spit on his face and was ready to start a fight when I noticed that I forgot to lift the helmet shield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 285

You deserved it 52 425

Juliett_fml 0

Monday 31 August 2009 16:03

well at least you were wearing a helmet...

Ligerie 0

Monday 31 August 2009 16:13

Thats my worst fear, spiders popping out of nowhere and me dying as the result.

Comments

Beef_Sister 0

Monday 31 August 2009 16:39

seeing is believing, so you better change your specs.

jdkfgkjdfb 0

Monday 31 August 2009 16:47

At least you were wearing a helmet when you crashed headfirst!

plexico 3

Monday 31 August 2009 16:52

Your mom: FTW! She knew you were such a clumsy oaf that you'd fall off your bike. Natural Selection is damning her for interfering and saving such a worthless specimen. "Halfway through my ride": Do you think the spiders were having fun riding around on your head and came out to tell you they've had enough? Back in the olden days, when people mostly DIDN'T wear helmets, I had a head-on bike crash and got knocked out. I don't think I suffered lasting brain damage, but I think about half the readers of FML disagree. ;) Since then, I've thought that those who aren't smart enough to wear helmets don't have brains worth protecting.

lordmoe 0

Monday 31 August 2009 17:36

I have brains worth protecting and I don't wear a helmet. Of course I know how to ride a bike and rarely if ever fall off.

plexico 3

Monday 31 August 2009 18:02

It's that "rarely" part that can be a bitch.

travelbug89 0

Monday 31 August 2009 19:30

I always wear a helmet. Not because I'm worried about me falling off, but because I don't trust any of the other crazy people on the road to not run into me.

plexico 3

Monday 31 August 2009 21:59

SOMAgirl, I'm flattered that you like my little aphorism. You've written some brilliant comments in the past and I am happy I could give back a little.

LilaBear 1

Tuesday 1 September 2009 12:46

Congratulations, your brains will be pulp on the ground when you get hit by a speeding driver. Helmets are not just about protecting your head from your own riding ability, but protecting you from the idiots around you who might cause an accident.

LilaBear 1

Tuesday 1 September 2009 12:49

sorry, that wasn't intended for you, it was intended for lordmoe #25.

blah123blah 0

Monday 31 August 2009 17:00

You called yourself a flying ****? Nice opinion about yourself there. Good self esteem.

the_stereotype 0

Monday 31 August 2009 17:01

1. Why would you put a helmet on and not notice there were spiders? Don't you even look? 2. If she FINALLY forced you to wear a helmet means you haven't been wearing one, so yeah, pretty dumb. 3. The helmet did it's job of protecting you from that crash and teaching you a lesson. In other words, YDI.

DynamicDave 11

Monday 31 August 2009 17:12

Ha I love your username. And FYL about the spiders

lordmoe 0

Monday 31 August 2009 17:35

I never wear a bike helmet, and in ever crash i've had i didn't need it. You shouldn't hate people for not wearing a helmet because that just makes you sound stupid.

nar_rauko 0

Monday 31 August 2009 17:44

99 times out of 100 you really don't need a helmet, but you never know when the 1 time is coming, so a helmet really should be worn. And do you sound stupid for telling people to wear a seatbelt? I mean, I've never been in an accident where I've needed one, does that mean I'll never need one? Telling people to wear a helmet is the intelligent sounding thing.

allie2590 31

Monday 31 August 2009 17:48

Does she realise that helmets expire after 3 years? Though you didn't say exactly how old this helmet was.

vanaathiel 13

Monday 31 August 2009 17:49

I never wear a helmet either...though I should seeing as I live in the city and am biking with traffic. I know it's the smart thing to do but I still don't, they're just too uncomfortable and irritating

flarehair 0

Monday 31 August 2009 18:38

Yeah, I bet you'll be very comfortable and un-irritated when you're in a vegetative state or six feet under. You won't feel a thing!

LilaBear 1

Tuesday 1 September 2009 12:40

if it's uncomfortable and irritating you, then you don't have it adjusted properly. Professional cyclists wear them all day every day so obviously they can't be that uncomfortable. I used to ride all the time (at least twice a day- to and from uni - I ride less often now) and they're perfectly fine when adjusted correctly.