Awkward, Neighbours and Fight: Sorry, I…

Sorry, I…

By signupsheetfail - 12/08/2009 19:02 - Canada

Today, I was doing target practice with my new paintball pistol. One of the bullets missed, and hit my new neighbor's house. I went up to the door to apologize, not realizing I was still holding the paintball gun. My ex-soldier neighbor thought I was robbing him and put me in a chokehold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 878

You deserved it 41 896

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Defense!

By ruined_suit - 17/04/2009 21:12 - United States

Today, I came home from work to find that my neighbor's trash bins were still on the curb. While returning the bins to her backyard, her kid ran out and shot me with a paintball gun. Multiple times. He thought I was a burglar and ruined my new suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 112

You deserved it 7 130

By lovehurts - 28/12/2009 20:41 - United States

Today, after breaking up with my girlfriend of two years over the phone, I got a knock on my door. It was my now ex-girlfriend who came to seek revenge by shooting me in the balls with a paintball gun at about a three-foot range. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 861

You deserved it 57 659

By iusedprotectionanyway - 21/03/2014 21:44 - New Zealand - Waitakere

Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 233

You deserved it 3 513

Get off my lawn!

By Anonymous - 29/08/2020 14:09

Today, the police came to my house and arrested me. Why? The neighborhood kids thought it would be fun to hide behind my house and shoot at people with paintball guns. People saw it coming from my house and called the police. I was fired from work, due to missing it without notice. No excuses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 113

You deserved it 109

Ballshot

By Anonymous - 02/12/2022 14:00

Today, I shot my boyfriend in the balls by mistake, twice. First it was a paintball gun I was using with my nephew, then it was a slingshot I use to scare away the bird who keeps eating fish from my pond. He is now sat icing his groin acting like I did it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 299

You deserved it 981

Ballin'

By oww - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, while playing paintball, a shot ricocheted off a wall and slammed into my nuts. I told the other team I was out and tried to run out of the field, but as I was jogging to the door I was hit again in the balls. My friend saw this and dropped his gun, laughing. It hit me too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 055

You deserved it 722

Sorry

By FailedSniper - 22/03/2011 16:31 - United States

Today, I saw my dad's friend across the street working on my neighbor's roof. To continue the airsoft war we'd been having, I shot at him with the sniper gun I'd bought. I hit him, and he fell off the roof. I ran over to see if he was OK. It wasn't my dad's friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 151

You deserved it 53 992

Risky

By Josh - 13/10/2023 16:00 - United States

Today, I thought it would be fun to join my friends for a game of paintball. I got shot in the same spot three times in a row. It turned out to be my own team, who mistook me for the enemy because I was wearing… camouflage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 204

By Z - 26/11/2012 10:26 - Australia

Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 793

You deserved it 25 010

By sore - 21/10/2009 08:27 - Australia

Today, I was paintballing when I got shot in the stomach and winded. As I was gasping for breath on the ground, someone came up and shot me point blank in my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 272

You deserved it 6 679

DeathShad0 1

Wednesday 12 August 2009 23:15

FYL since your neighbor can't seem to tell the difference between a real gun and a paintball gun.

matt5055 0

Wednesday 12 August 2009 23:32

First of all OP is a dumbass for shooting paintballs in a backyard, also for calling them bullets. And second it is a natural reaction to assume he has a real pistol because it's a paintball pistol, not a full size marker. Most of the time they have clips to feed the balls in and usually are black. From a distance you can easily mistake it for a real gun. Especially when you're a trained killer and instinct kicks in. You're not going to wait for him to point the gun at your face and shoot you.

Comments

STAZ211 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 6:17

YDI for calling paintballs "bullets", and for shooting towards your neighbors property. I shoot my paintball marker all the time and have had no problems. do it towards your own house/property. better to clean it off your own stuff than someone elses.

athos1237 4

Thursday 13 August 2009 6:24

Your stupid ass is lucky he just choked you out and didn't shoot you, as I would have, or gut you with a knife, something I might do also. YDI for being a dumb-****! Next time try it out at a paintball range or towards your own house. Dad may beat your ass but you won't really be risking your life. GOD loves children and fools. Guess which category you fall into.

Shyman4ever 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 6:30

YDI for aiming at your neibours house

cheeter 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 7:19

Oh yeah.. forgot Americans have guns and can kill you for going on their property. Ah ha Ydi for being a yankee.

imamonster1 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 11:52

hate to break it to you but; god isn't real you douche.

cheerleada14 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 21:11

u r an idiot if u think god isnt real! i guess u fall into the fool category from that comment, rather god probably is ticked at u for saying that, idiot