Poopoo peepee and Kids: Stylish

Stylish

By boo - 27/05/2009 18:15 - United States

Today, I had a job interview. I had to drop my daughter off with my babysitter first. When I got to the interview, I got a weird look from the vice president of the company. I had lime green poop running down the side of my white blouse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 854

You deserved it 7 426

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Same thing different taste

Stained for life

By Chris - 08/03/2023 18:00 - Ireland

Today, I went to a job interview wearing what I consider to be my lucky shirt. On my way to the interview, a bird dropped a load of bird poop on my shirt, and I didn't have time to change. During the interview, the interviewer kept staring at the poop stain on my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 143

Nerves

By ADH2000 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had a job interview. I stopped to take a pee in the lobby before I went in. I relaxed a bit too much at the urinal and accidentally farted. I chuckled about it like a 5 year-old for a few seconds. The guy who had been next to me at the urinal was the interviewer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 018

You deserved it 47 504

By SenorPoopypants - 08/01/2017 19:23

Today, I shat myself during a job interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 667

You deserved it 992

Stress test

By anonymous - 20/10/2010 06:38 - New Zealand

Today, I got so nervous that I actually peed my pants during a job interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 606

You deserved it 13 383

Dirty protest

By Paul - 21/08/2023 00:02

Today, I had a job interview; unfortunately for me, I was so nervous that all of a sudden I felt the need to take a huge dump. My bowels started growling out of protest. I tried to play it off as if it was due to me being hungry, but it sounded like I had a monster trapped in my guts. The interviewer raised an eyebrow in disbelief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 707

You deserved it 112

Stars of CCTV

By Guess I'm jobless - 10/01/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I nailed a job interview and they hired me on the spot. The only problem was I was bursting at the seams and had to poop really bad. After destroying their bathroom and taking my leave, not an hour later I got a phone call saying they're "gonna go a different direction." FML

I agree, your life sucks 538

You deserved it 226

The old switcheroo

By Anonymous - 13/03/2013 16:14 - United States - New York

Today, I had a job interview. I didn't have any clothes suitable for the interview, so I went to the store early and bought some there. After the interview, I went to return the clothes, because they were so expensive. The hiring manager saw me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 945

You deserved it 44 214

By Anonymous - 19/08/2015 05:49 - United States - San Jose

Today, my mom kissed me goodbye before I went to a big job interview. I got weird looks on the way there, but I figured it was just because I look like a massive douche in formal wear. Turns out my mom had smeared lipstick all over my chin. The person who finally let me know was my interviewer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 983

You deserved it 2 747

Raincheck?

By jib - 09/04/2022 07:00 - United States - Kilgore

Today, I was suffering from some gastric distress. While on my way to a job interview, I slipped on some concrete that was wet due to a recent slight rain shower. I didn't fall. I DID shit my pants though. I walked back home slowly in shame to clean up the mess. I didn't make it to the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 025

You deserved it 132

In the bag!

By hiccups - 16/05/2021 14:02

Today, I had a job interview. I thought it was going pretty well, until I got the hiccups. The interviewer immediately said, "Yeah, I think we’re done here," and sent me away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 082

You deserved it 84

losergirl 0

Wednesday 27 May 2009 23:03

...lime green poop? Is she radioactive or something? Or does she just eat too many popsicles?

Curtieeeez 0

Wednesday 27 May 2009 23:09

Lime green? What the hell are you feeding your kid?

Comments

lolsparky 0

Friday 29 May 2009 16:29

Wasnt from her daughter, a bird got her..she cleans her windows with Windex and it was pay back for giving ol' Birdys friend a concusion.

FaithX 0

Friday 29 May 2009 19:21

YDI for feeding your child something that would turn her poop that color.

ScarsNme 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 5:23

I'm not so sure the poop came from her daughter, unless she's an alien. Radioactive pigeons maybe?

LJ99 0

Saturday 6 June 2009 5:01

Do you not have a sense of smell. Lmao.

rakhil11 7

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:43

ewww that sucks!!!

Adriennerox211 0

Thursday 2 July 2009 7:51

How soothing o.O

Andyangels27 0

Saturday 8 August 2009 10:46

why would you wear a white shirt and why was the poop green last time I checked my shit was brown.

pinkfakecheez 0

Wednesday 19 August 2009 18:22

Guys, don't get worried just because the poop is lime green. Babies can do anything from brown to yellow to green.

omg2funny 1

Tuesday 19 January 2010 14:37

Well at least you know where the interviewer was looking at...

Ninja666_fml 0

Thursday 27 May 2010 2:12

adding to #1, how did u manage to shit ur pants anyway? especially lime green shit!

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Health Accident ADHD Medication Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Am I overreacting? Relationship advice Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

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Today, the woman I love, who rejected me countless times, got a boyfriend. Bitter about it, I post on my Instagram Story: “I could have been your love bug, but apparently you’re into roaches.” She posted a story of them kissing, saying, “I love my roach so much!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 48

You deserved it 1 337

Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year-old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 391

You deserved it 115 808

The Top

Today, my wife is mad because she forgot our anniversary. Not me, her. She thought it was today and got mad at me for having nothing planned. It’s tomorrow, and I do have stuff planned for us. So she’s mad at me because she got it wrong and felt like an idiot, which is somehow my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 561

You deserved it 82

Today, I was made aware that my teenage son used "Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter" as a reference point in a class debate as if it was a biopic. Oh dear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 601

You deserved it 2 913

Today, I really want to punch whoever says women have no problem getting laid. It’s been so long since I’ve felt the touch of another human, I actually considered hiring a male prostitute just so I can be in a man’s arms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 606

You deserved it 410

Today, my boyfriend of five years gave me the silent treatment, refusing to talk to me or do anything more than glare at me during the entire three-hour drive we took this morning. Why? Because I slept with his best friend. In his dream last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 620

You deserved it 7 325

Today, I noticed a stray string on a seam of my pants. I started absentmindedly pulling at it thinking maybe I could pull it off. Five minutes later, I realized it looked like I was fiddling with my crotch in the middle of Starbucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 181

You deserved it 12 096

Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 943

You deserved it 56 308

Same thing different taste

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