Work: Thanks, I guess - FML

Thanks, I guess

By ST3PH - 09/07/2009 19:17 - Canada

Today, my boss requested that I re-organize every file in the office, because she wanted the filing cabinets alphabetized right to left, not left to right. To thank me, she came into my office to give me one uncooked ear of corn. I think my boss has mistaken me for some kind of farm animal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 706

You deserved it 3 712

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Thanks mom!

By hatedatwork - 02/09/2019 13:00 - United States - Shreveport

Today, my CEO called and spoke to me like I'm a child. Apparently, she has a surprise for me, "but only if I clean up my office first." She hasn't been to my office in months because she works in another state. Turns out, someone texted her a picture of my messy office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 859

You deserved it 1 928

Not like that

By Anonymous - 03/02/2023 22:00

Today, my boss told me to 'think outside the box'. I did and got lost in a corn maze for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 273

You deserved it 609

By Anonymous - 10/01/2011 13:23 - Canada

Today, my boss asked for recommendations on how to improve the office. I sent her an e-mail full of my ideas. Later, my boss sent me a reply, saying, "Here's what head office thinks of your ideas." It contained a list of insults upper management made about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 217

You deserved it 3 757

By Anonymous - 24/05/2011 04:38

Today, my boss ate a small piece of paper off her desk, thinking it was frosting. I have to work for this woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 529

You deserved it 3 833

By Liz - 11/08/2011 02:21 - United States

Today, my boss became very angry over her own mistake on a spreadsheet. She lashed out by throwing a can of SpaghettiOs at my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 926

You deserved it 2 632

By MSURebel70 - 16/07/2010 23:48 - United States

Today, I found out I've been incorrectly sorting thousands of papers for the past two weeks. My boss wanted them sorted by date, but the co-worker who instructed me said to sort them into alphabetical order just to watch me fail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 954

You deserved it 3 373

Let him cook

By last literate - 27/10/2011 16:15 - Canada

Today, my boss made me run yet another stupid errand. When I delivered the paperwork to his office, I saw an email printout on his desk. Apparently, he has a plan in the works to get me "fried" next month. I'm not sure whether to give him a letter of resignation or a bottle of barbecue sauce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 375

You deserved it 2 740

By Anonymous - 15/09/2018 14:30 - United States - Buffalo

Today, during a meeting with my boss, she explained she's giving me one more chance before she has to fire me. Her reason? I accidentally ordered chicken on a salad last week for a meeting and she feels my performance has gone down the tubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 844

You deserved it 230

Help yourself

By Anonymous - 13/04/2023 22:00

Today my boss went digging through my drawer, took a pack of gum, and told me I got him the wrong flavor. He kept it anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 914

You deserved it 100

Lackey

By Anonymous - 12/05/2022 12:00 - Australia - Batesford

Today, at 1 am, I got a message from a colleague, who I have never met, bossing me around requesting "immediately, ASAP" some information a monkey could've found online in 5 minutes. I told her that she sounded rude and unorganised. Ten minutes later, I got a mail from my boss asking me to apologise to her. I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 136

You deserved it 303

Next

Top comments

redbluegreen 40

Friday 10 July 2009 1:19

Well, that's kinda corny.

vheissu 0

Friday 10 July 2009 1:09

at least you got some corn.

Comments

retardthinkswhat 3

Friday 10 July 2009 7:52

Nay

Flounder 2

Friday 10 July 2009 7:58

#95, well that's nothing to be proud of. This is the lamest FML ever.

Flounder 2

Friday 10 July 2009 8:00

#95, well that's nothing to be proud of. This is the lamest FML ever.

ashole1990 10

Friday 10 July 2009 8:07

but left to right makes more sense

laurisshnazzy 0

Friday 10 July 2009 8:23

YLIA.

justanotherhuman 21

Friday 10 July 2009 8:26

YDI- you worked hard, and did a good job. Now you have some maize. Score.

Illustrator 0

Friday 10 July 2009 9:21

That's the boss's way of showing she's into you.

TheLoneWolf87 4

Friday 10 July 2009 10:31

off topic but why do they call it an ear of corn?

HeyitsPheddy 0

Friday 10 July 2009 10:35

Well you are Canadian...

lolli_pop9 0

Friday 10 July 2009 12:34

bahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha that is all....

LeCorsaire_fml 0

Friday 10 July 2009 10:55

that's one cheap boss.

5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Love Embarrassing Miscellaneous Romantic Christmas Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Cheating Jealousy Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, my thieving, layabout stepmom planted weed in my bedroom and showed my dad. Well, maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here, but her smirk and telling me later that I shouldn't fuck with her again seems conclusive to me. Goodbye freedom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 128

You deserved it 3 083

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 636

You deserved it 42 714

The Top

Today, I bought some makeup supplies at the supermarket. The cashier snorted and muttered, "Not enough in the world for you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 466

You deserved it 3 989

Today, I found my neighbours bratty kid in my house, eating my snacks, dirtying my sofa, and drawing on pages torn from my books. I marched him back home by the ear, him screaming I was a meanie, and his mother's only excuse was, “Boys will be boys.” No apology or anything. I HATE KIDS. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 194

You deserved it 145

Today, I am pregnant, and my boyfriend dumped me, saying that he didn't want to be stuck in anything too serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 327

You deserved it 10 043

Today, I ran into a girl I used to go to school with. We went out for dinner to catch up, and we ended up at my house, watching movies and cuddling. This fantastic and spontaneous date was concluded with several kisses. I dropped her off at her car and drove off. I forgot to get her number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 749

You deserved it 64 217

Today, after days of hearing our new neighbour abusing his wife, my wife went round to confront him while on the phone with the police. Turns out they are just really into their BDSM and had no idea how loud they were being. They have costumes, toys and everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 165

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I thought I'd be spontanous and spice things up, and gave her a spank across the butt. She started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 745

You deserved it 18 106