Health, Sex, Parents and Intimacy: Thanks Mom

Thanks Mom

By Enko - 09/11/2008 07:43 - France

Today, my mum was watching a program about sexually transmitted diseases. Later on, she started telling me that I should be careful and use the right protection when having sex. Suddenly she stopped and said, "Actually, I don’t know why I’m telling you this, you don’t have a boyfriend!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 592

You deserved it 5 249

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/02/2012 20:25 - United States

Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 819

You deserved it 37 526

By rahrahcakes - 19/03/2012 07:36 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, my mum cleaned my room. When I got home she yelled at me for having condoms. I'm 24 years old and in a long term relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 777

You deserved it 12 804

By Anonymous - 18/07/2009 17:15 - United States

Today, my mom gave me a talk on safe sex. During a three hour car ride. With my friends in the back seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 079

You deserved it 3 888

By saddened97 - 20/01/2011 09:39 - Australia

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was fingering me. After he left, my mum says to me "I wish my sex life was as interesting as yours." She had walked in and we hadn't even noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 711

You deserved it 12 898

By Anonymous - 09/11/2011 12:55 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 440

You deserved it 9 326

By dpl - 19/02/2009 21:44 - United States

Today, my mom found a condom in my pocket while doing my laundry. Instead of having the subsequent discussion about the birds and the bees my mother simply asked "Who would have sex with you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 581

You deserved it 5 636

Thanks mom

By Anonymous - 14/02/2021 14:01 - Colombia

Today, my mom decided it was a good idea to remind me about my non-existent sex life while all the family was having dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 042

You deserved it 109

Bad start

By Tripp - 14/07/2019 14:00

Today, I sat my mom down to tell her I was pregnant, but before I could say anything, she started to lecture me on safe sex. I don't see this ending well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 788

You deserved it 619

Don't wanna know

By Anonymous - 16/02/2011 05:50

Today, my dad gave me the dreaded sex talk, but he got sidetracked and started talking about how good my mum was in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 208

You deserved it 4 187

Never ever

By notgettinsome - 10/11/2013 06:15 - Australia

Today, my mother was scolding my youngest sister for having unprotected sex with yet another partner. She continued with, "Why can't you be like your brother and just never have sex?" I'm 22, and she's not wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 280

You deserved it 5 232

xMooMoox 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 23:05

Now is the time were you sneak a guy into the house and have really loud sex. When she catches you say "I thought you wanted me to get some!" And walk away.

Pearson_fml 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 10:20

you should have said somethin along the lines of "you don't have to have a boyfriend to have sex y'know"

Comments

CatherineARE 0

Friday 9 October 2009 4:22

hmmm... maby your mum saw the same thing my mother saw because my mother saw a show about the same thing then when come home she tells me "hey.. today i saw a show on STD's and thay said that orel sex can cause throat cancer" i reply with.."hmmm i did not know cancer was contagious" then i walk off and she yells "remember i love u and no ********" i guess because i look 17 i momther forgets i'm allmost 13 but i was 11 at the time (maby my mother thinks i'm a **** hmmm) mother's must be weird all over the world...... but then again my mother is braind dead..... thats not a joke..

IndigoFuckYou 9

Sunday 3 April 2011 19:19

Ehem. Catherine. I congratulate you on telling everyone on FML a completely useless story, along with your name and age. way to take up space.

PASSWORD_unlucky 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 5:50

Agree with #1,# 2,# 5, #6, #8. hahaha, I think that was a tipical "uncomfortable moment"

happyhak 5

Monday 25 January 2010 19:53

Who says you need a boyfriend? :)

fatalkiss 0

Monday 8 March 2010 5:08

I don't even think this is an fml she only said it because she thinks you're not messing around with guys you're not dating meaning she doesn't think you're a *****.