Transportation: Today, a creepy old guy on the bus asked me if I wanted to "lick...

By flowerchildd2 - 12/12/2011 23:17 - United States

Today, a creepy old guy on the bus asked me if I wanted to "lick it." When I said no, he tried to convince me by telling me that "it tastes good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 466

You deserved it 3 037

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Same thing different taste

New creepypasta

By pokeballbra - 17/10/2011 05:44 - United States

Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with, "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 108

You deserved it 4 083

By Revalation - 27/08/2011 23:06 - United States

Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 567

You deserved it 3 075

By robotchickens - 10/03/2010 19:54 - United States

Today, while on the bus, an old man told me about all the many things he wanted to do with my various orifices. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 183

You deserved it 2 707

By ugly - 10/07/2011 06:03 - United States

Today, a total stranger on the bus called me hideous and threw a soda in my face. I only asked him if the seat next to him was taken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 184

You deserved it 3 515

By anonmys - 18/07/2010 21:47 - United States

Today, I was riding the train and saw a cute guy licking his lips at me. Flattered, I gave him my number when the train stopped. He looked at me and said, "Don't flatter yourself. You have mustard on your face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 460

You deserved it 19 430

By Anonymous - 26/08/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 891

You deserved it 3 720

By Anonymous - 08/02/2015 16:05 - United States

Today, a creepy old guy kept hitting on me in line at Subway. I got scared and told him to back off because my dad was waiting for me outside. He replied that he wouldn't object to a three-way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 997

You deserved it 2 744

Great conversation starter

By balkangirl94 - 23/12/2011 07:42 - United States

Today, a guy tried to seduce me by talking about incest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 487

You deserved it 3 736

By scarlet - 09/05/2011 15:02 - Canada

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 897

You deserved it 3 412

By needanewride - 16/11/2012 02:40 - United States - Newton Center

Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 299

You deserved it 3 316

TheStunner 0

Tuesday 13 December 2011 8:37

This is one of those times you don"t trust the wise elderly.

Awsemogreeb 19

Tuesday 13 December 2011 11:57

It.

Comments

SukiIzumi 8

Tuesday 13 December 2011 18:58

Kinda creepy...

nastyness 0

Tuesday 13 December 2011 19:08

Just one of the many reasons I'm glad to own my own vehicle! Who knows where "it" has been...

Tommananaze6T9 4

Tuesday 13 December 2011 19:24

Well he never said what "it" was,maybe "it" was a lollipop or a popsicle.

bubo_fml 10

Tuesday 13 December 2011 19:51

What about the 'free love' hippie shit? Doesn't sound like much of a 'Flower Child' to me!

Gigaboo 0

Tuesday 13 December 2011 20:06

it was a sucker!!? duh!

KiddNYC1O 20

Tuesday 13 December 2011 20:07

You've got to lick it before you kick it!

hateevryone 14

Tuesday 13 December 2011 20:36

you should've slapped him.

JayAyyEmm 0

Tuesday 13 December 2011 20:58

Smile and walk away.

jay1010 0

Tuesday 13 December 2011 21:09

creeper:/

unagi_fml 9

Wednesday 14 December 2011 1:27

"oh, 'kick' did you say?"

Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable My ex Jealousy Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

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Today, my laptop was slow so I used my husband’s laptop. I went to the bedroom and found it opened, so I moved the trackpad and it powered on. The first thing I see is a page with redhead porn, and another tab with nude redheads. You know who else is a redhead? The new girl at his job he tells me not to worry about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 132

Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year-old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 391

You deserved it 115 808

The Top

Today, I decided I don’t need to restrict my consumption of shrimp anymore, which I used to do because they are so expensive. So, did I finally land a well-paying job? Nope. It's just that all the other kinds of seafood have risen so much in price that it doesn’t make any difference now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 690

You deserved it 133

Today, Facebook told me I should reconnect with my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 326

You deserved it 7 733

Today, as I was sleeping, I found a snail in my bed, yet I was dreaming so I thought it was a dream, but it felt real. I jumped out of the bed and I couldn't believe it. I wonder how it got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 718

You deserved it 102

Today, I had a fight with my little sister. Later she apologized and made me dinner to make up for it. I thought it was pretty good until I found out that instead of using Parmesan cheese in the recipe, she used foot shavings from her Ped Egg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 219

You deserved it 6 934

Today, while looking through the camera my boyfriend got me, I found a video of a girl giving him head. After screaming at him about it and breaking up with him, I realized the girl was a drunken me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 821

You deserved it 67 127

Today, my boyfriend bought me a voice personalized Build-a-Bear. I thought he was going to propose to me through it, only to press the foot of the bear and hear, "We should break up" instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 347

You deserved it 3 834

Same thing different taste

New creepypasta

Great conversation starter

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