By Anonymous - 15/12/2010 05:09 - United States

Spicy
Today, a man dressed as Santa Claus walked by me, grabbing my butt. He smelled of pipe tobacco and pee. He pulled me close to him and whispered, "I bet you're naughty but you feel so nice." I looked dumbfounded at him as he winked and yelled, "You're on my list." FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 609
You deserved it 4 347

Same thing different taste

Top comments

gotta love Creeper Clause.. FYL. go take a shower and scrub away as much dirty as you can! lol

Lol. Creeper Santa has got some awesome lines. Can't blame him though. It is after all Santa's MO to go around emptying his sack down your chimney. ;-)

Comments

Ha ha. Awesome. Sleezy Santa has got all the lines. Anyway, we all know it is Santa's MO to stuff the naughty little girls stockings with his lumps of coal... And the good little girls get him emptying his sack down their chimney. ;-)

starfuryt550 3

he's probably outside the mall now ringing a bell with perverted smile on his face. ..... excuse me, but I have to run out and get me a Santa suit. maybe get a bunny suit for Easter too

perdix 29

Since you are on the naughty list, Santa is going to give you a lump, not of coal, but of something that smells like "pee." ;)

wtf_amb 0

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

agreed. that's exactly what I was thinking. one time is enough for me to realize hmmm I should prob not let him do that again. especially if he smells like pee. gross

girls are ****** these days, they act like it's such a big deal but obviously they don't care if they didn't smack them or do something about it, it's very pathetic.

gabrielbaby 9

Or maybe she didn't know what to do? I wouldn't. I would be like wtf, and try to get away. But maybe she also didn't want to get charged with assault, and/or arrested, possibly sued. It could happen, it is America. We do sue for a lot and a lot of crap.

Did you feel the lump of coal in his pocket as he pulled you close, you naughty, naughty girl?

28 - why do you have a strong hand? *****.

My hand is strong because I pimp slap hoes, much like yourself, into submission and intelligence. That is all.

Ohhhh Shitttttttttttttttttttt ^ that was quite clever

Inspired22 11

You should replied, "I'm on your list, but you're not on mine."