Intimacy: Today, after months of patiently waiting, I finally got my roommates...

By Kiddo - 02/09/2013 06:49 - United States - Jacksonville

Today, after months of patiently waiting, I finally got my roommates out of the house for the night so I could have sex with my boyfriend for the first time without being interrupted. He couldn't get it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 012

You deserved it 7 446

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/11/2009 14:04 - United States

Today, I finally had the opportunity to have sex with my girlfriend. This would be the first time for both of us, so I tried to make it really special. I had everything planned out to be very romantic. She loved how it was set up. After all this, I couldn't get it up at all, all night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 142

You deserved it 5 116

Cougartown

By Anonymous - 28/08/2022 02:00

Today, my boyfriend snuck out of my room so he could have sex with my mom in the next room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 805

You deserved it 178

By Anonymous - 10/08/2018 18:30

Today, I finally had sex with my live-in boyfriend after a long dry spell. It was passionate and great, until I hurt my back changing positions. Now he refuses to touch me, going as far as sleeping on the couch to give me "enough space". Hello new dry spell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 255

You deserved it 394

By disapointed girl - 28/12/2009 16:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 015

You deserved it 5 893

By Patricia - 01/10/2011 23:30 - United States

Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home, he was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 569

You deserved it 5 721

Hard to believe

By Anonymous - 02/01/2020 18:00

Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home he was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 375

You deserved it 579

By Anonymous - 27/11/2015 06:42 - France - Cateri

Today, I had a boyfriend who wanted to wait until marriage before having sex. When I came home, I realised he must have married my roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 566

You deserved it 2 192

By Confused - 22/08/2012 16:33 - Spain - Madrid

Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 772

You deserved it 4 419

By Anonymous - 15/01/2013 17:45 - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 792

You deserved it 6 662

Follow the script

By ufhdafuhds - 19/03/2009 23:31 - Egypt

Today, I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pocket. Turns out he'd written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML

I agree, your life sucks 139 399

You deserved it 14 504

mectain 13

Monday 2 September 2013 16:04

Viagra was made for a reason.

FailBear920 19

Monday 2 September 2013 16:04

Today's letter is the letter V for Viagra.

Comments

Bernie1298 11

Monday 2 September 2013 18:23

That kind've stuff happens.

silenttscream 5

Monday 2 September 2013 18:31

Why can't you just tell your roommates that you need to bang? Surely they'd leave you alone instead of you having to wait months for them to leave.

sweetbliss3 37

Monday 2 September 2013 19:06

do you sleep in the living room or something? just curious to why you needed them to leave? just lock the door next time and play some music. he was probably just nervous. don't worry too much about it

Sammyjam1993 12

Monday 2 September 2013 19:28

After months? No wonder he couldn't get it up!! Too much pressure to perform perfectly after months of abstinence. Poor guy. YDI for blaming him.

Flashman9000 9

Monday 2 September 2013 19:37

So you put a guy in a high pressure situation and asked him to **** you in a specified time slot...wow that's romantic.

holymackeral 12

Monday 2 September 2013 19:47

Did you forget how to suck his dick? That usually works quite well

8born8 18

Monday 2 September 2013 22:27

58 do you know what *********** is? For your statement is bold, I hope that you are well versed in the language of ***********, lest word shall spread of your selfishness in bed.

kobykai 3

Monday 2 September 2013 20:44

Maybe he just flaccid. He might not have a erectile disfunction.

Love_is_no_joke 6

Monday 2 September 2013 22:13

Oh wow

Forenzics 10

Monday 2 September 2013 22:17

Whiskey will do that to ya

8born8 18

Monday 2 September 2013 22:21

Performance anxiety, stage fright, call it whatever you want. There are other forms of sex. A penis does not have to be inserted into a ****** for two people to have sexual intercourse. There's a plethora of aids and devices out there for both men and women to get and keep you in the mood. There's even adult board games that range from cheeky to R18+. I suggest you go down to your local sex shop and see if anything "tickles your fancy". Shopping in an erotica store together can be a stimulating and titilating experience. Not your kind of thing, you say? What's the matter?... Afraid you might like it? ;P