Health: Today, at karate, my sparring partner thought it was completely...

By Mayyouneverfindpleasureinavagina - 01/06/2013 04:31 - United States - Garden Grove

Today, at karate, my sparring partner thought it was completely okay to surprise kick me in the vagina. When he saw me doubled over in pain, he was completely surprised. Apparently, he thought that it wouldn't hurt, because I have no penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 239

You deserved it 5 273

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By TKDConnor92 - 22/07/2011 10:51 - United Kingdom

Today, I was helping a 7 year-old student in my martial arts class with his kicks. My reward? A surprisingly powerful kick to the testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 659

You deserved it 6 733

By Anonymous - 18/09/2011 21:24 - United States

Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought I was her ex-boyfriend. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 386

You deserved it 4 442

By filipinoclari808 - 16/04/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 794

You deserved it 81 433

By Anonymous - 02/04/2009 10:28 - United States

Today, we sparred for Tae Kwon Do. I forgot my cup, but I didn't think anyone sucked enough to hit me below the belt. 5 seconds into a match, some girl knees me in the happy sacks. After writhing in pain for 30 seconds, I got back up to spar. I didn't think she sucked enough to do it again. She did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 049

You deserved it 31 041

By Karate Kid - 25/05/2012 06:29 - Australia - Surry Hills

Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 972

You deserved it 35 378

Take that

By anonymous - 26/01/2010 12:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my Muay Thai class. We were doing a combination which consisted of a low kick, body kick and head kick. My partner had already done the low kick so I held the pads for the body kick. He kicked me straight in the jaw. I'm a teenage girl and he's a fully grown man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 277

You deserved it 3 807

Little brat

By Anonymous - 21/03/2022 18:00

Today, I learned that being kicked in the vagina by your brat brother not only makes you vomit from the pain, it also makes you get a period an hour later so unbelievably more painful than usual, you're forced to use the real good painkillers left over from your dad's spine surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 121

You deserved it 144

Pissed

By TJ. - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - India

Today, my friend whacked me in the family jewels while I was washing my hands in our college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 671

You deserved it 3 079

Newbie

By Anonymous - 25/11/2010 18:18 - Singapore

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I was struck with a white-hot pain, and in the confusion thought her vagina had contracted hard. It turned out it was actually my uncircumcised penis retracting for the first time in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 617

You deserved it 7 746

Iron Man

By Anonymous - 14/12/2009 23:46 - United States

Today, my little brother punched me in the stomach. When I didn't flinch and he asked me why, I thought it would be funny to tell him I was Iron Man and that nothing could hurt me. Two seconds later, he took a step back and kicked me in the nuts as hard as he could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 676

You deserved it 38 480

Hamlin 5

Saturday 1 June 2013 13:43

Surprise kick him in the balls back

lachy15 15

Saturday 1 June 2013 13:43

He is an idiot. The fact that he thinks it's the penis that is the sensitive part backs that up. It's the testicles that are sensitive, and apparently the ****** is fairly similar.

Comments

mattyiscool123 26

Saturday 1 June 2013 19:32

Yes surprise kick him in the penis thinking that it wouldn't hurt

onorexveritas 23

Saturday 1 June 2013 19:33

oh man, I know first handedly that that shit is painful. that guy should let you have a go at him just for that

missmonkie 16

Saturday 1 June 2013 19:34

He's a dumb ass. You'll get a bruise there and it might hurt to pee

AngrySailor 17

Saturday 1 June 2013 19:42

Did he lose a shoe in there?

swedeNix 13

Saturday 1 June 2013 19:59

King geri is a pain no matter the gender...

Ellae_fml 7

Saturday 1 June 2013 20:11

kick him in the knee. he has no penis there, so it shouldn't hurt.

AngrySailor 17

Saturday 1 June 2013 20:44

You got kicked in the ninja slipper! By a ninja slipper!

jamnglamgirlie 17

Saturday 1 June 2013 20:57

I use to take TaeKwonDo lessons and the same thing happened too me. I was 5.

ViviMage 38

Saturday 1 June 2013 21:02

He kicked through your clothes and INTO the ****** cavity, totally missing the vulva around it? So you screwed his foot? Either your anatomy is wrong, you were naked, or his is very well aimed.