Miscellaneous: Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking...

By poop - 18/05/2009 17:25 - United States

Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking behind me by holding the door open for her. As she was walking through, I inadvertently pulled the door too hard. It slammed against the wall and ricochet back, hitting her right in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 630

You deserved it 19 524

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Same thing different taste

By bossgroper - 23/07/2009 20:23 - United States

Today, I was walking through a heavy door at work, so I reached behind me to catch it so it wouldn't slam shut. Little did I know that my boss was walking through right after me. Instead of catching the door, I caught a handful of his crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 936

You deserved it 5 523

I don't know my strength

By Anonymous - 09/01/2022 06:01 - Australia - Perth

Today, I gave the back door a slight nudge to make sure it was latched shut. Of course, it flew wide open, causing me to smash my face into the doorframe, fall out onto the back porch writhing in pain, and have blood pissing out of my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 935

You deserved it 308

By GreenMonstR - 25/04/2009 05:09 - United States

Today, I was at the store with my wife. As we were walking out, I helped an elderly woman get through the door. As I was opening the door, my foot got stuck on the door and my face was catapulted into the woman's breasts. It wasn't until we got into the car that my wife burst into hysterics. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 230

You deserved it 4 773

By xxx - 03/09/2017 04:29

Today, at a meeting, I had a heated argument with the only female employee at the office. A little later, I managed to hit her in the face with a door, giving her a bruise. Nobody believes it was an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 671

You deserved it 531

By PleaseDontHateMe - 20/09/2016 16:42 - Canada - Stony Plain

Today, I tried to impress a girl by draping my arm over the back of her chair. I ended up elbowing her in the nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 303

You deserved it 5 016

By facefuckedguy - 12/08/2014 21:23 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I went to a job interview, and a guy ahead of me went to enter the building, only to walk face-first into a glass door. I rushed to help him up, and after we had a good laugh about it, I turned to walk inside, only to walk straight into the door as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 167

You deserved it 10 030

Show off

By a stupid jackass - 22/06/2012 01:28 - United States - New York

Today, I got lunch with a girl I really like. On the way, for some idiotic reason I decided it would be a good idea to show off by jumping up to high-five the red hand on a traffic sign. I ended up slipping and slamming full-force into the pole. I now have a bruise on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 938

You deserved it 37 552

Alexa, play "Mr Loverman" by Shabba Ranks

By Anonymous - 15/03/2020 18:07

Today, I was at a store when I saw a cute girl from my school. Trying to act cool, I went to hold the door for her. Too bad it was an automatic door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 810

You deserved it 1 129

Are you OK?

By Anonymous - 24/09/2024 09:00 - United States - Austin

Today, I walked into a glass door at a busy mall. Not only did I face-plant in front of a crowd, but I also left an almost perfect imprint of my face on the glass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 146

Thanks a bunch

By nose hurts - 30/12/2012 01:01 - United States - Richmond

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 645

You deserved it 3 494

ohhboyy 0

Monday 18 May 2009 23:20

BOOOOM HEADSHOT

unlucky91 0

Monday 18 May 2009 23:18

Well, either thats the end of meeting her or maybe you'll have a story to tell your kids :] but yeah FBYL ( **** both your lives). i hope she doesn't get a bruise

Comments

freemuffins 0

Monday 18 May 2009 23:40

Nice mr muscles

Indiana_fml 4

Monday 18 May 2009 23:43

Actually, you succeeded: You definitely left an impression...

ilikefish 0

Monday 18 May 2009 23:43

Next time don't hold the door open and this won't happen and you won't look like an idiot.

rukusrazor 0

Monday 18 May 2009 23:44

So, how was the first date? Did you pull the seat out too far and let her fall on her ass too?

pineapples_fml 5

Monday 18 May 2009 23:50

haha, hopefully you were holding the door open to a hospital

Panime 0

Monday 18 May 2009 23:53

Hey, genius_man16, that is such an ironic name for you considering your failure to understand #2's simple comment. He isn't saying that holding the door for girls is low standards, he is stating that if you think holding the door is impressive then your normal actions are low standards (i.e. Letting doors swing into people you don't find attractive or want to impress).

CheezerX 0

Monday 18 May 2009 23:53

haha owned by a door... cant impress ppl by opening doors man thats just common courtesy

emer_helena 0

Monday 18 May 2009 23:58

I got as far as "today at work i tried to impress a girl" and figured one of you got injured

SomeGuy1234 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 0:02

Ah chivalry fails due to incompetence.

eeee93757 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 0:06

This is coming from a guy.... you held open a door for a girl to IMPRESS her? You automatically failed before slamming the door on her, that just makes it a very epic fail.