Health: Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML - FML

By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 16:45 - United States

Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 002

You deserved it 32 366

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Same thing different taste

Ouch!

By Anonymous - 11/11/2021 02:00

Today, my son tripped into a door and slammed it shut. I'd been holding onto the door frame, leaning around to talk to a neighbour, so of course it slammed my fingers. It must be a really sharp door, because I just woke from the surgery to reattach my three amputated fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 484

You deserved it 129

By BudmaudeY - 31/03/2011 20:53 - Sweden

Today, I noticed that the injury on my hand from three weeks ago no longer hurt. A while later, I accidentally slammed that same hand in a door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 430

You deserved it 15 826

By Amy - 10/05/2012 19:14 - Canada - Prince George

Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 043

You deserved it 5 237

By LostInSunday - 15/08/2016 08:11

Today, I accidentally slapped myself in the face with my belt when I pulled it from my belt loops too quickly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 269

You deserved it 2 805

What? How? Why?

By Anonymous - 17/03/2021 22:01 - United States - Boise

Today, I smashed my finger with a hammer. A finger on the hand holding the hammer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 699

You deserved it 309

How on Earth…?

By Ouch - 14/10/2024 05:00 - United States - Steele

Today, I cut my finger trying to open a door. Yes, I am just as confused as you are. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 70

You're grounded!

By Break A Leg - 08/08/2022 14:00

Today, I accidentally slammed my leg against the coffee table. It was only after I went to the bathroom a few minutes later that I realized there's now a massive gash on my upper leg. I also got in trouble for yelling, "SON OF A BITCH!" as soon as the impact occurred. FML

I agree, your life sucks 762

You deserved it 138

I don't know my strength

By Anonymous - 09/01/2022 06:01 - Australia - Perth

Today, I gave the back door a slight nudge to make sure it was latched shut. Of course, it flew wide open, causing me to smash my face into the doorframe, fall out onto the back porch writhing in pain, and have blood pissing out of my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 935

You deserved it 308

Night fight

By FistFighter - 09/04/2011 04:01 - United States

Today, after getting up to press snooze on my alarm clock, I climbed back into bed. When I went to reach for the covers quickly because I was cold, I missed, yet still managed to pull back my fist with force punching myself in the face. I now have a bloody fat lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 938

You deserved it 12 978

How does that happen?

By Anonymous - 10/04/2023 22:00 - Unites States

Today, I accidentally super-glued my hand to my face while trying to fix a broken pair of glasses. I yanked it off in a panic, taking a patch of my face along with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 634

You deserved it 461

Next

Top comments

haw008 14

Thursday 26 January 2012 19:00

How does that even happen?

Rachel1987 4

Thursday 26 January 2012 19:00

Lose weight? That's really gross.

Comments

littlecityof 3

Friday 27 January 2012 2:52

Maybe something is being done about it. Maybe OP is in the process, it doesn't exactly take two weeks to drop a bunch of weight

LilyZombie 8

Friday 27 January 2012 3:04

This. This is epic.

kittenvks 11

Friday 27 January 2012 3:39

It says arm flab people not fat. The OP most likely lost a lot of weight, let's say through gastric bypass surgery... So telling them to put down the fork or lose weight is pointless, not to mention rude and slightly troll-ish OP (most likely) already has! Now the mental image that went through my mind was of it being flabby enough to go through the other side. Can you imagine being on the other side of THAT door?! Lol

Bluemonster3 26

Friday 27 January 2012 3:56

Wow...

kaitlinthecutie 0

Friday 27 January 2012 4:00

Time to lose weight maybe?

ilove80smetal 8

Friday 27 January 2012 4:04

Are you by any chance Howard Wolowitz's mother from big bang theory?

Strwbry3Shortcke 8

Friday 27 January 2012 4:15

How did you manage that.....

jaycob11 0

Friday 27 January 2012 4:22

Fatass lose weight

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Friday 27 January 2012 4:31

To all the people saying OP is fat, get off your high horses. EVERYONE has arm flab unless they're anorexic, so anyone could slam their arm into a car door. Way to jump the gun and further condone stereotyping.

dragonmirado 12

Friday 27 January 2012 11:53

Killjoy.

Honda288 2

Friday 27 January 2012 4:49

If that can happen I suggest you start trying to lose weight. And maybe try ducktape to hold the flab for now.

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The Top

Today, my adult daughter was hospitalized for severe fever, diarrhea, and fainting. The doctor couldn't find any cause other than sleep deprivation, because I started making her wake up at 7 am. I’ve never met anyone so ridiculously weak in my entire life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 138

You deserved it 548

Today, after six months of doing the job of 2 people, because all my coworker does is sleep and sit down with her phone, I told my boss that I can't be doing my coworker's job and getting the same salary as her. My boss added just $10 to my salary and told me to let her carry on doing nothing, while I still do the work of 2 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 558

You deserved it 131

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 26 193

You deserved it 81 198

Today, I found out about my sister's insanely detailed plan to abduct my one-year-old son and raise him as her own on another continent. All my mom did was tell me not to worry because she can't afford to move that far away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 239

You deserved it 1 308

Today, my girlfriend likes playing games on her phone more than she likes me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 125

Today, I took my girlfriend out to eat at a diner where my friend works. My friend was our waiter but too busy to talk much. He texted me after we'd left to tell me that my girlfriend had slipped him her number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 998

You deserved it 3 417

Today, I heard what sounded like water against my window, and I couldn't believe it was raining in Southern California at this time of the year. I then turned to the window to see a hobo peeing on my window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 408

You deserved it 2 648

Today, I was diagnosed with a condition that makes me lactate. I'm a 6' tattooed guy with a boxing competition coming up soon. I'm never going to hear the end of this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 389

You deserved it 1 825