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Comments
ouch.
YDI for either.... 1. Trying to marry a minor 2. Subscribing to the dracnion idea that you need her fathers permission, as if she's property to be passed from him to you. You've earlier defended yourself saying you only wanted a "blessing," and there would be nothing wrong with that. In fact, that would be rather sweet. But why didn't you ask for just his blessing then? Better yet, why didn't you ask her for her /parents/ blessing, if its really just the family's acceptance you're after? Sir, by sitting her /father/ down and asking for his /consent/, you are committing a sexist act, no way around it, and you deserve to die alone. Or, at least, you need to learn to form your words better. If that was truely not your intention to imply that she's masculine property, you can at least see where it was easy to infer that it was by your wording. If I was a father, I'd say no to any bumbling idiot who asked for my permission too.
Punch that bitch in the stomach.
Boo hoo, Dad said no. Go ask the mom, if she says no THEN you're screwed. If she says go ahead, you're good to go. Or, you could get with the times. Ask the girl to marry you! Asking the parents is really just a formality of asking for a blessing. It is NOT required unless you're some kind of sicko trying to wed an underage kid... if that's the case, be glad daddy didn't have a shotgun.
Asking for a woman's hand in marriage from her father is a sign of respect people. The man's answer isn't law, you don't have to listen if be says no. Afterall you aren't marrying him. However, just asking shows character and family values.
It's not a sign of respect to the woman the man is marrying, who should be old enough to make her own decisions! It's a throwback to the days when marriage involved a woman being traded like property between her father and her fiancé. And if you're not going to listen when he says no anyway then you're not asking for his permission, you're asking for his blessing, so that would be a less creepy way of putting it.
"Family values"? You mean outdated values that say a woman is her father's property, and that she can't make her own decisions about her life? You mean the values that say children should be controlled by their parents, even after they become adults? "Family values", just like all other values, should be critically examined before being accepted. If they turn out to be sexist, racist, or otherwise illogical, they should be thrown out so that society can adopt more logical, more modern beliefs that don't treat human beings as someone else's property.
101, correct me if I'm wrong because I'm not really familiar with American history, but according to what you say about all ancient "values" and such, doesn't that mean all Americans should not celebrate Thanksgiving? It is rooted in the murder of millions, isn't it? Unless I'm wrong of course.
Yep. It's a time where we all gather 'round the table and thank the good Lord for helping us slaughter most of a country's inhabitants. YEEEEHAWWWW, AMURRIKAH!
Thanksgiving was never meant to celebrate the enslavement and extermination of the natives; it was meant to celebrate a good harvest. Granted, the holiday originated with the first settlers in the Americas, but celebrating a good harvest does not in itself promote or suggest inequality. On the other hand, asking a father whether you could marry his daughter very directly suggests that the daughter is his property.
I agree with you. matter of fact in some families it's not outdated. my family doesn't see it as the girl is property but it is respectful to them. but no doesn't mean you can't marry her though
I don't see it that way, ideasrule. To my understanding, the feast was all thanks to the Native Americans who brought them the food, and then they started murderering them the next day, yes? No one mass kills on a whim, obviously this was planned. The whole feast was basically taking advantage of the Native Americans' kindness. And yet there's nothing wrong with celebrating Thanksgiving, because obviously the murders and abuse are not at the core of the celebration of the holiday. Nothing here suggests the daughter is property. OP probably worded this wrong, and I have also explained in my other posts, this is a matter of getting a blessing, not permission. I doubt anyone honestly asks for permission nowadays. I can't know for sure, but I'm going to presume all OP meant was a blessing, not really permission.
Good of you to be traditional...now do it anyway.
Um, unless she's underage it's the woman that you love and you don't need her dad's permission! Stop patronising her and see if she's up for it and if she's mature enough to stand up to her family! That's what really matters!
Keywords
in 2011 we still have to ask parents for permission?
We need permission? What? Where the hell did I put my dang permission slip?!...