Love: Today, I asked my boyfriend of almost ten months who his top...

By lucky - 31/03/2009 00:39 - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend of almost ten months who his top five women to have it off with would be. I was third. My mom was second. FML

I agree, your life sucks 106 117

You deserved it 17 909

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

Bigmouth strikes again

By Anonymous - 19/09/2020 08:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend came over. My mom told him the story about the time she caught me having sex with my ex-boyfriend. My ex is his best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 758

You deserved it 1 224

MILF Manor

By daughter - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Sweden - Vårgårda

Today, I found out that, for over three years, my boyfriend has solely been dating me to get closer to my mom. Apparently, "she's a total MILF." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 249

You deserved it 2 381

By Noname - 06/02/2009 19:23 - United States

Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 634

You deserved it 18 550

Mama Bear

By Ally - 19/05/2022 16:00

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents. We've been dating for almost 5 months and are extremely in love. His mom basically said to me, "I want what’s best for my son and you aren’t it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 984

You deserved it 149

By Anonymous - 21/08/2019 18:00

Today, I now have been dumped by 4 serious girlfriends in the last 5 years, each of them for the same reason: Being with me would have meant dealing with my mother who, without fail, asked each of them when we planned on marrying and having kids, every single week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 221

You deserved it 583

By Anonymous - 01/12/2012 06:06 - United States - Friendswood

Today, I brought a boy over to my house to help with a history project. My mom suddenly swooped in and bombarded him with questions about his and my sex life, and how she wants to have exactly four grandchildren. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 327

You deserved it 2 245

Brutally honest

By Anonymous - 12/09/2009 07:25 - Australia

Today, at dinner with my boyfriend and my family, my mother had too much to drink and asked my boyfriend how I was in bed with the purpose of embarrassing me. His reply? "Not as good as her sister." His defense? "It was only one time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 960

You deserved it 2 920

By koolkat9 - 22/12/2014 19:11 - United States - Albion

Today, my boyfriend told me that my mom paid him to date me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 034

You deserved it 3 313

By BrisbaneCoop - 04/04/2011 17:13 - Australia

Today, my fiancé and I visited his family for dinner. The entire time I was there, his mother and sister had an in depth conversation about how attractive his ex girlfriends were and how they got along with them so well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 294

You deserved it 3 094

By Embarrassed - 22/08/2013 04:40 - United States - Gloucester

Today, I was playing Charades with my boyfriend's family. When it was his turn, he pointed at me. His mother said "Bitch?" The answer was "relationship". FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 816

You deserved it 4 351

loveandzombies 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 9:34

Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer....

poopooface 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 9:35

Why would you ask that in the first place? ... as if you wanted to know who the other 4 people where.

Comments

2gether4ever 0

Saturday 20 March 2010 5:27

well...who was first? <:S

terror_twins 0

Saturday 3 April 2010 11:06

# 1 wins

nemohazADDlama 0

Saturday 22 May 2010 22:28

and I was first

angel55033 12

Tuesday 8 February 2011 6:38

why would you ask each other that? ydi

klm0200 0

Wednesday 16 February 2011 3:10

woahh, who was #1? your grandmother?

jwktheman 6

Thursday 7 July 2011 21:22

Kim kardashian=#1

Fylbro197 0

Tuesday 2 August 2011 4:41

LOL

avbav99 0

Friday 12 August 2011 4:31

Who was first?

Jordyn345 4

Thursday 15 September 2011 4:32

Well good thing your best friend wasnt first!

Psycho_Babydoll 26

Monday 31 October 2011 16:36

Well you asked...

Keywords

Family Miscellaneous DIY Cats Poopoo peepee Work Awkward Management Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Transportation Dogs Animals ADHD Dating Love Technology Mental health Health Anxiety Sleep Clumsy Noise Roommate AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, after finally getting up the confidence, I started talking really dirty to my boyfriend on the phone. I was getting really onto it, and he seemed to enjoy it too. Then I stopped for a second to gauge his reaction. He was snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 872

You deserved it 4 683

Today, a field engineer decided to rework everyone's schedule, just because he couldn't be bothered to do a full day's work. Now two of us who would've been busy all day are sat on our phones, and he's off out on "errands". How a day goes depends on how bothered he can be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 707

You deserved it 81

The Top

Today, my boyfriend of 17 months, the first guy to tell me he loves me, the guy I lost my virginity to, the only guy whose parents I've met, told me we should stop 'hooking up' because it's weird that I was telling everyone we were a couple and it was ruining his chances of finding a girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354 854

You deserved it 37 842

Today, one of my neighbors dressed up in the exact same costume as me. Every house I go to refuses to give me candy because my neighbor has already been there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 313

You deserved it 3 518

Today, as I walked into McDonald's with my mom, she glanced at me and said, "Smells like your future." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 009

You deserved it 3 987

Today, at the age of 24, the only way I can remember anything at all is if I repeat it over and over again like a mantra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 763

You deserved it 99

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because apparently, I'm a drug addict who can't speak without slurring and stumbling with my words. I have a recurring speech impediments and the stammer is definitely real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 718

You deserved it 173

Today, I asked my mom if I could go to a friend's birthday. She said no, claiming I had been to too many this year already. I'd only been to one. It was my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 376

You deserved it 237