By Sal - 03/03/2009 18:29 - United States

Spicy
Today, I asked my girlfriend when she would give me a blowjob. She replied, "you know that won't happen, I'm a vegetarian." FML
I agree, your life sucks 71 047
You deserved it 31 136
Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

Tehalon 0

If she ever expects you to go down on her then just reply with sorry you know that won't happen, I'm not a cannibal.

196 8
drybamboo 0

I didn't know consuming bodily fluids was a carnivore activity. Does that mean she doesn't condone french kissing? Unless she equates a ******* to actually biting off a piece off your whatwhat. In that case, you should probably be grateful that she is a vegetarian.

126 2

Comments

luciert 0

I'm vegetarian... But I usually use something along the lines of "there's one kind of meat I'll put in my mouth."

0 0
wafflemonger 0

148... that is wonderful. You made me lol, literally.

0 0
kmkrce 0

That is the best excuse yet...I need to become a vegetarian.

0 0
lexxi_fml 0

Wow, lots of ass holes. Just because she's a vegetarian, doesn't make her less of a person. I'm a vegetarian and I don't go around telling people "YOU NEED TO BE VEGETARIAN!!" My whole family is meat eaters and they expect me to make my own meals but I'm fine with that cause it's my decision. So, just because she doesn't eat meat, doesn't mean there's something wrong with her or that she's a pussy. And people saying that you should dump her? What the hell? Wow, sex-obsessed ass holes... And, I totally agree with the people saying that being a vegetarian is the LAMEST excuse for not giving head. But she obviously wasn't serious, it was just a funny way of saying no. So chill... if funny. Definitely not FML but it's still funny. Props to you.

0 0
jhowser 0

#11 STFU every heard of tofu, legumes, nuts, soya products, dairy and vegetables? ignorant shit.

0 0
IntoRapture 0

Wow. Gross. Some girls just don't like giving head. Get over it. I won't do it for my boyfriend, and he understands my choice completely. Some guys just can't think with anything but their penis, I guess. You fail.

0 0
JessS92_ 0

lmaoo!! i guess i'll use that excuse on my bf next time haha

0 0
bozz9 0

lol. If she was kidding thats hilarious, if not ...... good luck

0 0
strawberryswirl 0

I never give head anyway, and I eat meat. I ESPECIALLY wouldn't give head to someone who asked - in fact, I wouldn't waste any more time on a guy who did. To be fair, I don't make guys go down on me, either, because I don't particularly enjoy it myself. If you're at this stage in your relationship, just have sex, and then you BOTH get to enjoy it, and nobody feels degraded or grossed out. So basically, YDI for even asking her to do it.

0 0
wafflemonger 0

156, just because you personally are grossed out by an extremely normal and enjoyable part of sex doesn't mean everyone else has to feel the same way.

0 0