Love: Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by...

By Anonymous - 27/09/2013 20:33 - United States - Spring Branch

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 005

You deserved it 4 556

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Same thing different taste

By ouch - 16/06/2016 10:14 - United States - Livonia

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was so angry, she stabbed me in the hand with a plastic fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 384

You deserved it 2 016

By HttpsHaileyy - 15/06/2015 20:02 - United States

Today, I insulted my younger sister's hamster. She then smashed me with a stool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 795

You deserved it 9 592

By Anonymous - 03/12/2012 11:53 - Canada

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 092

You deserved it 4 194

By traumatised - 11/10/2009 16:16 - United Kingdom

Today, my new roommate decided to put his pet hamster in the same cage as my beloved hamster. Apparently he wanted them to make hamster babies. They are both males. His hamster attacked mine and tore it to pieces. I just finished cleaning up the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 482

You deserved it 2 793

Not so anal retentive then…

By Anonymous - 03/02/2017 22:00 - United Kingdom - Hull

Today, after finally breaking up with my controlling girlfriend, she took a shit in my socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 350

You deserved it 741

By deadhamster - 03/02/2012 18:29 - United States

Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 444

You deserved it 5 048

By Anonymous - 29/10/2012 05:46 - United States

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 132

You deserved it 28 804

By starfishedasshole - 30/03/2014 16:50 - United States

Today, I broke up with my psycho girlfriend of one month. She actually expected me to let her keep the vintage car that I've been rebuilding for the past two years, and when I refused, she threatened to burn my garage down with us still in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 068

You deserved it 4 350

By kingpin9219 - 30/05/2011 04:29 - Canada

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend in a crowded mall. I thought this was a good idea, until she went ballistic, began screaming and crying, and then stabbed me in the stomach with a ballpoint pen. I got banned from the mall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 093

You deserved it 52 450

By bTOhno - 13/08/2011 06:37 - United States

Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 060

You deserved it 4 732

vrossie_ 15

Saturday 28 September 2013 5:03

Can't you call then cops for that? ..

123amanda123 14

Saturday 28 September 2013 5:04

the poor hamster! :(

Comments

TheDoctor10 28

Saturday 28 September 2013 5:22

This adds to my already prevalent dislike of people.

zandalee 19

Saturday 28 September 2013 11:34

Oh come now. Most people are lovely! Don't let this make you cynical.

ksks1234 33

Saturday 28 September 2013 5:22

Damn! That is beyond crazy, scary. Get a restraining order ASAP, and possibly stay with someone else for a while. She is definitely not stable and might try to hurt you.

awkwierd 9

Saturday 28 September 2013 5:23

WTF

Meaniebobeanie 26

Saturday 28 September 2013 5:24

**ringring** **ringring** • Hello, PETA representative speaking? Uh huh? Uh huuuh... NOO!! Yes. We will take care of it sir. Have a nice day. **CLICK** • SIR! We just got in a call about a hamster killing, sir. Particularly disastrous. She used a fork. Sir - Call a Code • Bbut sir... They only owe us one more favor - I know. • Are you sure? - Yes. • One mob hit coming right up. - Oh, and Billy... • Yes sir? - This is the right thing to do. Pets owners everywhere are counting on us. You can do this! • YES SIR!! Thanks. Dad.

every1luvsboners 11

Saturday 28 September 2013 5:27

You were just pumping it up with steroids to send it up your arse for your pleasure anyways. She did the hamster a favor by killing it.

Quantumpanda 13

Saturday 28 September 2013 7:06

And your basis for making this marvelously intelligent and insightful comment is what, exactly? (What? Is my sarcasm showing again? Dang it, I thought I had that under control.)

graceinsheepwear 33

Saturday 28 September 2013 7:47

43, I am starting to get an idea why you made the semen-scented fart comment in the interview FML. Seems you may look at everything from a rear-facing perspective.