Fair play to you for still seeing the fun side of it and post this fml! Well done

Please OP. Don't do this to yourself. Nobody wants you gone and you shouldn't want that either of all people. I hope that you can find the support that you need. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

... He's drunk... I mean the hotline guy...

Well, you're posting on FML rather than offing yourself, so I guess it worked?

Hi OP, I'm Amanda. I know what you've been through, because I attempted suicide 4 years ago. I know sometimes hearing things like, "don't do it!" and, "someone loves you very much!" can seem like straight-up BS when you're at the point that you're at, but I can promise you things get better. It may be a few months, hell it took me 2 years to be ok and start being happy again, but you have to keep fighting for it. And it's completely worth it. Try finding a hobby, maybe something you've always wanted to try but didn't. I started belly dancing and it totally changed my life and gave me confidence that I thought was impossible. Seek more support, talk to someone you trust (even if you're scared or think they won't care.) Distract yourself when you feel unsafe and call someone. I wish you the best of luck, lots of love

maybe a wrong number? but don't give up, you did the right thing reaching out don't let this bad experience stop you from seeking help.

Things are never so bad that they couldn't be worse is what my father told me, and I'm telling you. Help is out there and people care, take it from someone who went through the fires of hell and came out a stronger person. If you need to talk..

Now that is completely unprofessional. He should be fired. People like him could cost someone a life.

Hang in there, OP!

Hey OP, this kinda repeats what a few other people've said, but I guess that just reinforces the point. It took some time - won't lie, a couple of years - for me to get past the point where you are right now, but things turned around. Not because I was going through a rough time or something like that that just needed a change or because I found a good distraction - the stuff that was causing my depression was shit that can't be fixed once it happens - but because life really does have surprises in store at the most unexpected times, and not only bad ones. I couldn't imagine how things could ever be okay again for me, but now, in many ways, they're even better. WE change, that's what usually helps people who can't stand life anymore. If you're at that point where it seems like everything will be always be shitty, as tough as it is, you've just gotta wait it out. Try to find comfort in moments, not whole days. Maybe watch a TV show that's guaranteed to have a joke you'll like, as silly as that may sound it actually works wonders sometimes. I'm not lying when I say that sometimes I stop and think about something that's going on, "This is awesome, could I even have imagined three years ago that this would be happening?" And it's a great feeling. And feel free to message me if you need an ear - there's a chance that I'll be slightly drunk too, but I definitely won't tell you to **** off. :) Good luck, buddy!