Animals, Weird, Cats and Awkward: Today, I caught my husband and the cat licking the butter together....

By whatdidimarry - 24/09/2015 23:31 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, I caught my husband and the cat licking the butter together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 269

You deserved it 2 303

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 19/06/2012 10:51 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I found out that my husband and my cat have something in common; they both like to lick themselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 274

You deserved it 2 751

By jsmills92 - 21/12/2012 00:26 - United States - Cranston

Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 424

You deserved it 4 454

By confusedcatlover - 06/04/2013 11:42 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 279

You deserved it 6 222

By upliftmofo - 28/03/2011 05:56 - Belgium

Today, I discovered my cat frequently licks my toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 665

You deserved it 5 983

By OldHabitsDieHard - 18/09/2013 14:53 - United States - Erie

Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 720

You deserved it 18 763

By Anonymous - 14/11/2014 02:14 - United States - Kennesaw

Today, I got home and found my wife cuddling with the dog and our new kitten. Both the cat and my wife hissed at me when I tried to join in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 514

You deserved it 4 197

By Anonymous - 08/07/2012 11:26 - Australia

Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 114

You deserved it 3 501

By no no no no no no no no no no no fuck no - 01/09/2013 20:04 - Greece - Athens

Today, I witnessed my husband hocking a loogie into his hand, then throwing it into the trash can and continuing to make our sandwiches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 300

You deserved it 3 227

Nutritious

By Anonymous - 19/07/2020 17:01

Today, I caught my dog “cleaning” the cat’s litter box. He won’t be giving me any kisses anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 221

You deserved it 277

Leftovers

By Anonymous - 16/09/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I woke up to my cat licking my face. Cute, right? Turns out, she was licking the crumbs off my cheek from last night's pizza party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67

You deserved it 499

Allusivness 21

Friday 25 September 2015 14:21

No pussy jokes people.

Halpak 16

Friday 25 September 2015 14:21

I guess the cat's got his tongue

Comments

BitterSavage 20

Saturday 26 September 2015 20:36

They're just living the dream!

CaptainBlack 18

Sunday 27 September 2015 19:46

So I'm getting married in December, we've never lived together, and my fiancee has a cat. You're giving me ideas, and that may or may not be a good thing...

kayayye 22

Monday 28 September 2015 8:48

awh

Fudgernutter 1

Tuesday 29 September 2015 18:03

He's just softening his tongue for later :P ?

DemonBoy1988 22

Monday 9 November 2015 12:10

Day 11, they still think I'm one of them...

Skyfoogle 14

Friday 8 July 2016 14:55

Funny story - I didn't perceive the last two letters of "butter" when I read this.

Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Poopoo peepee Gross Miscellaneous Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Relatable Work Cars You're fired Covid Health Cheating Jealousy Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Roommate Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, I put lemon juice in my hair as a cheap and easy way to get highlights. I left it in my hair and I laid out in the backyard to get some sun. The sunshine wasn't the only thing that found me; it seems every bug in the neighborhood is now hiding in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 540

You deserved it 51 165

Today, the girl I have a crush on came over to work on a project. My dad rushed into the room we were in, farted, and then ran out giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 620

You deserved it 5 878

The Top

Today, my little brother texted me informing me that our father has "become a nudist" since returning home from a month-long trip abroad. I thought he was joking or exaggerating, but when I went over to say hi, the first thing I saw upon walking through the door was my dad's droopy ball sac. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 016

You deserved it 4 537

Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish the job. Welcome to Russia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 767

You deserved it 90

Today, I called a suicide prevention hotline. The guy who picked up sounded drunk, told me to fuck off, and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 536

You deserved it 3 731

Today, my abusive ex-husband thought it was a good idea to buy the house next door and start living there immediately. Looks like I gotta move. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 304

You deserved it 86

Today, I learned that my daughter will literally eat until she is sick to keep her father and brothers from getting her dessert. I also learned that my boys are sympathetic vomiters. All five of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 773

You deserved it 380

Today, I found out my son is getting bullied. His stepdad doesn’t care, in fact he’s all for bullying because he thinks it will force my son to stop being smart, or "a dork" as he calls him, and fit in with the normal kids for a change. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 310

You deserved it 208

Same thing different taste

Nutritious

Leftovers

Top comments

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