Intimacy: Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob....

By canucks_chick - 23/10/2011 05:45 - Canada

Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 657

You deserved it 21 052

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

How romantic!

By dislocated - 14/02/2018 20:30

Today, my boyfriend dislocated my jaw by sitting on my face while trying to fart on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 709

You deserved it 868

Silver linings

By Anonymous - 27/05/2022 06:00

Today, during sex with my new boyfriend, he gave me such an intense oral sex orgasm, I clenched my jaw and broke one of my back teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 214

You deserved it 315

By fatcheeks - 02/03/2010 16:58 - United States

Today, I got all four of my wisdom teeth removed. I went to see my boyfriend for comfort because I was in so much pain. The first thing he asked me when I saw him with huge cheeks? When would be the next time I could give him a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 476

You deserved it 4 184

By neckcrack - 07/09/2010 10:18 - Australia

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. I got a little too enthusiastic during it, and wound up cracking my neck loudly, and had to stop while the pain settled down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 215

You deserved it 24 091

By 530gangsta - 25/04/2017 16:00

Today, while having sex I managed to chip my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 333

You deserved it 429

Come again

By Anonymous - 09/07/2009 07:35

Today, I gave my boyfriend a spontaneous blowjob while we were watching TV. After he finished, I tried to pull a sexy move I'd seen in a porno by zipping his pants back up with my teeth. His foreskin got caught in the zipper and we spent the next few hours in the emergency room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 994

You deserved it 62 530

By dom - 08/09/2010 06:53 - United States

Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 316

You deserved it 33 856

By Anonymous - 30/10/2014 20:55 - United States - College Place

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 007

You deserved it 27 435

By Anonymous - 26/08/2017 01:30

Today, my girlfriend was in the midst of giving me head when she got lockjaw. My dick was stuck inside her mouth as she bit down on it for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 475

You deserved it 768

By pleasedie - 07/05/2015 18:00 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I took a shower with my boyfriend. I tried to be adventurous and went to give him a blowjob, only to end up slipping and head-butting him in the balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 035

You deserved it 6 802

JTthePurpleNinja 5

Sunday 23 October 2011 12:06

Was it that big ? Holy shit.

NitroTonicsFML 4

Sunday 23 October 2011 12:18

I'm just gonna say it...that blows.

Comments

shelby0123 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 14:53

idk y but I have to say that's effort lol

Chezzycheeze 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 14:54

Do work.

jobsman99 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 14:57

Must have been a great deep throat. He will expect that every time now.

LoveMay 10

Sunday 23 October 2011 14:58

Was he really that big?

ddddj1 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 14:59

U must do it pretty good I want sum of that ;)

TheHolyLama 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 15:02

too big for you to handle?

roadie143 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 15:06

today, my car got rear ended by my prof car. inorder to get good grades i lied to cops that it was my mistake. fml

chronick89 5

Sunday 23 October 2011 15:13

Wow that's hilarious! Go Canucks! Haha

MyPerspective 4

Sunday 23 October 2011 15:14

His tool must have been HUGE.

SemanticX 9

Sunday 23 October 2011 15:24

You must have been doing it a whole different kind of wrong

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I can only have sex with really fat men, because that’s what turns me on, yet as soon as the sex is over, through no fault of theirs, I have to run to the toilet to be sick because I can’t believe what I just had sex with. I’m so messed up in the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 905

You deserved it 2 524

Today, it's been two months since I broke up with my boyfriend. He's been texting me every time he found a bobby pin at his house that belonged to me, saying we should both see it as a sign of us belonging together. If he keeps this up every time he finds one, the texts will probably never stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 096

You deserved it 880

The Top

Pokémon GO got weird...

I agree, your life sucks 254

You deserved it 93

Today, I finally lost some weight. Unfortunately, that's only because I had a testicle removed due to cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 081

You deserved it 75

Today, I found out my dad ate my pet rabbit two years ago. He said he ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 357

You deserved it 4 185

Today, I was at Sea World and was about to take a picture of the big walrus. I noticed my phone was still set to use the front camera, and I muttered "Oops, selfie mode." A guy next to me turned, looked at me, and said "Not like there's a difference for you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 265

You deserved it 9 318

Today, my roommate decided to splash out on a prostitute. When my expensive watch and the contents of my wallet turned up missing in the aftermath, his only comment was, "Shit happens, bro." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 452

You deserved it 4 363

Today, it was my birthday. I only got one message, from my dad, which was a sexual image meant for my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 985

You deserved it 3 451

Same thing different taste

How romantic!

Silver linings

Come again

Top comments

Comments