Miscellaneous: Today, I dropped my keys in the toilet. While in the kitchen...

By ShittyKeys - 06/11/2009 08:57 - United States

Today, I dropped my keys in the toilet. While in the kitchen looking for something to fish them out with, I heard a door slam. My sister had to use the bathroom and didn’t see my keys in the toilet before sitting down. Lucky me, I caught her just as she was about to flush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 463

You deserved it 5 507

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 12/11/2008 08:10 - France

Today, I dropped my keys in the sewer. The spare ones are inside my locked car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 943

You deserved it 11 418

By Stacy - 05/07/2011 04:04 - United States

Today, while using the restroom at work, I dropped my keys into the toilet. I left to find something to get them out and figured nobody would use a toilet with keys in it. I came back to a bowl of dung and "Shit happens" written on the wall in lipstick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 957

You deserved it 8 456

By oh, shit...... - 02/02/2016 20:27 - Denmark - Bagsv?rd

Today, I was at the gym. At the end of my workout, I realised I lost the bundle of keys I had in my pocket that contained the key to my locker with all my stuff. I panic and start looking for them. After an hour of desperate searching, I find them thrown in the bottom of the public toilet. Thanks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 416

You deserved it 1 989

By Mandoune - 07/11/2008 14:18 - Finland

Today, I dropped my keys in the drain. Thankfully, my new flat mate generously offered his help to reach the keys via flower pot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 330

You deserved it 4 581

By Lostring - 02/07/2018 20:30

Today, I was fiddling with a ring my aunt hand made me, accidentally slipping it off, and dropped it in the toilet. Like an idiot, I scrambled to get it out only for my bending over to activate the automatic flush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 133

You deserved it 993

By phansmootchie - 20/12/2011 08:14 - United States

Today, I lost my keys. My roommate locked me out, then yelled at me when I made her come home to let me in. I tore my room apart searching for them, and even went out to search my locker room. When I got home, I glanced at my wall only to find my keys hanging on the hook I set up specifically for them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 309

You deserved it 37 456

Sticky situation

By CodyS - 03/09/2013 05:03 - United States - Rocky River

Today, on my lunch break, I ran to the gas station, and threw some trash away on my way in. On my way out, I realized my keys were missing. Thinking I threw them away, and fearing that I'd be late returning to work, I tore through the disgusting trash only to find my keys on the seat of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 218

You deserved it 11 284

Anyone could've waltzed in

By DTMM - 15/09/2023 08:00

Today, I was looking for my condo keys, thinking I had left them in my mailbox on the first floor the night before. Leaving to check, I realized I'd forgot to take them out of my door when I had come in, leaving them in the keyhole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 229

You deserved it 529

Bad pranks are annoying

By Anonymous - 17/01/2020 20:00

Today, my sister snuck into the bathroom while I was in the shower (the lock is broken) and took my clothes and towels. I came out and quickly went to my room. As I went in, my sister was sitting on my bed with two friends watching TV. I instantly covered up, but they saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 703

You deserved it 324

By LizGo - 17/11/2013 06:00 - United States - Greenville

Today, after just having used the bathroom, my ring fell in the toilet. After stealthily removing it with a toothbrush, I went to go wash it in the sink. It then fell down the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 435

You deserved it 14 698

alexgirl 0

Friday 6 November 2009 16:31

Wouldn't it of been easier to just reach in with your hands and grab them when you first dropped them in? If there was nothing else but water in the toilet, just wash your hands after.

unfortunate_13 5

Friday 6 November 2009 16:20

let her fish the keys out of the toilet, she peed/pooped on them

Comments

Callyn 47

Friday 6 November 2009 17:29

If you dropped your keys in the toilet but your sister used it without flushing first means that there was nothing in there to begin with. If the toilet was empty, you should have just grabbed your keys with your hands like a normal person. I still don't get how you dropped your keys in there, though.

sadistmonkey 19

Friday 6 November 2009 18:40

I agree. Unless the OP didn't flush and then the sister somehow didn't mind that it wasn't flushed...

erinreneehealey 0

Friday 6 November 2009 17:38

i don't really see how this is an fml, it's just a close-call kind of story

youKnowBetter 0

Friday 6 November 2009 18:18

If you don't find the prospect of fishing out pee or shit covered keys an fml... well, I just don't know.

rx0829 0

Friday 6 November 2009 19:30

Actually, as gross as it sounds, if his sister just went pee, then it would be just as clean as sticking your hand in toilet water. Urine is sterile.

andyroxs 2

Saturday 7 November 2009 13:18

youre not much better than my physics teacher who ate foam packaging "peanuts" in the middle of class, saying it was biodegradable and isnt harmful. Poo is biodegradable.

Jaygirl 0

Friday 6 November 2009 17:47

i would've just grabbed them and just wash my hands after...

Mr_Eated 0

Friday 6 November 2009 18:02

Why do so many women just sit down on a toilet without looking? I know so many women who do this, and then complain when there's something there that they didn't see - like a raised seat or closed lid. Your sister should've fished them out for her sitting-without-looking-first maneuver. FYL, you didn't deserve THAT.

your_face 15

Friday 6 November 2009 18:58

First of all, men should REALLY learn to put the seat down when they're done, if not the lid. It's not a hard concept, and it's actually more hygienic - by closing the lid you keep water from spraying out when you flush. Now as far as looking at the toilet - yes, you should check that the seat is down and the lid up, but you can see that from a distance as you approach the toilet, and raise/lower what you need without really looking. None of that requires looking INTO the toilet bowl. Why should you expect to have to check for things sitting in the water? Especially something like keys, which may have sunk down and be harder to notice at a cursory glance.

Mr_Eated 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 12:26

As for looking in the water first, it's just common sense to be sure nobody clogged it before you do your business. As for the lid, lid down, I agree. Seat down without lid - um, no. If men have to lift and lower, so should women. If you're not closing the lid, then it stays in last position. Personally, I always close the lid. I don't enjoy looking into a toilet when I'm washing my hands or brushing my teeth. And it keeps me from doing dumb shit like dropping keys into the bowl.

Anonymiz 4

Friday 6 November 2009 18:30

A. For future reference: Use your hands, then use soap (most people wash their hands after toilet use anyway). B. If you had already used the toilet and then dropped the keys, did you wash your hands before you went rooting around in the kitchen? Did you think you would find something in your KITCHEN that would solve this problem better that solution A? What, exactly? And were you planning to throw it out afterward or wash it? I wouldn't want any tools in my kitchen that I had used to fish around in my toilet. Ick!

956TXking 0

Friday 6 November 2009 18:32

use your hands who cares if you get corn in between your finger nails lol

Dydy_fml 0

Friday 6 November 2009 18:33

WHY ARE U SO ******* DUMB MAN?? TAKE A PLASTIC BAG AND PUT YOUR HANG IN THE BAG SO YOU CAN GET YOUR ******* KEY WITHOUT TOUCHING THE WATER !! YOU DUMBASS