Miscellaneous: Today, I experienced the most intense pain I have ever had in...

By Anonymous - 26/12/2011 21:41 - United States

Today, I experienced the most intense pain I have ever had in my life. I was eating blueberries when my sister made a comment which sent me into hysterics. The force of having a bullet-like berry violently shoot out your nostril is more painful than it sounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 600

You deserved it 4 363

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Wicked game

By Hellohaileyexoh - 27/08/2009 04:07 - United States

Today, I went to get food. I was late so my friend ordered for me. I took a few bites and all of a sudden it got hard to breathe. I realized it was a blueberry muffin, and I'm deathly allergic to blueberries. I looked at my friend, and she was laughing, saying she wanted to see if it was true. I just got out of the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 154

You deserved it 5 911

By Anonymous - 02/01/2016 03:46 - Canada - Dartmouth

Today, I sneezed incredibly hard while eating a granola bar. 5 hours later, it's still hellishly painful to swallow. Please kill me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 152

You deserved it 1 849

By tictacnose - 08/01/2012 00:33 - Canada

Today, my sister attacked me and stuffed a Tic Tac up my nose. I'm currently in the hospital waiting to have it removed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 492

You deserved it 3 205

But… why?

By Fmylife - 06/07/2011 09:17 - United States

Today, I have a cold. Trying to clear out my stuffy nose, I tried putting mouthwash in my nose. Thinking it was an awesome idea, I put some more in. I then starting screaming in pain due to the extreme burning in my nostrils. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 258

You deserved it 120 990

By someone euthanize me - 16/01/2016 08:17

Today, I tested out my new paintball gun by firing a few rounds into some thick bushes. Nothing could've prepared me for the angry swarm of hornets whose nest I'd apparently shot. I'm in so much pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 879

You deserved it 8 044

By farhia97 - 08/11/2011 02:14 - United States

Today, I learned how much it hurts to put a mint up your nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 232

You deserved it 54 811

By ThanksChris - 16/10/2011 07:06 - United States

Today, I was watching my cousin shoot at targets on hay bales with his plastic pellet BB gun. After my sister asked him if it would hurt to be shot with one, my cousin smiled at her and said, "Ask your sister" as he shot me in the leg. I think my screaming was obvious enough. It hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 907

You deserved it 3 316

By TLJ321 - 18/05/2012 07:41

Today, I tried to swallow a spoonful of cinnamon. I ended up vomiting chunks of burgers, all while bleeding from the nose and suffering throbbing testicles. I then had to clean it all up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 613

You deserved it 58 899

Cool moves

By littlegirl - 07/05/2011 04:46 - Canada

Today, I was sitting with my crush at lunch. Trying to flirt, I tried to stare seductively into his eyes while sucking on my straw. I missed. The straw shot straight up my nose, causing me the worst nose bleed of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 585

You deserved it 45 364

By Anonymous - 12/01/2010 07:18 - United States

Today, I learned I have a severe sinus infection, my body really can't handle antibiotics, and I can projectile vomit out my nose. Not sure if I am more impressed that I still somehow aimed the puke into the sink, or that swallowing afterwards hurt more than emptying my stomach via my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 435

You deserved it 2 265

lerouxmaster 7

Tuesday 27 December 2011 0:47

The sister. She was killed instantly.

thisisafunnyname 12

Tuesday 27 December 2011 0:44

did it hit anyone?

Comments

jannadrina 3

Tuesday 27 December 2011 1:41

I feel your pain. I once swallowed an inch long triangular piece of pineapple before even getting one bite into it. I felt like a razor blade going down.

Vrb1981 0

Tuesday 27 December 2011 2:04

You should try childbirth.

1happymummy 14

Tuesday 6 March 2012 10:18

Agreed.

screamo_neve 12

Tuesday 27 December 2011 2:16

This is by far the funniest thing I've heard/read all day. I can't stop laughing. Maybe I can make my brother do this with grapes.

Ixi_the_pixie 11

Tuesday 27 December 2011 2:35

Did you hit her with it?

zjdoyen 4

Tuesday 27 December 2011 2:45

haha

hoppy9632 0

Tuesday 27 December 2011 2:45

im sorry :(

Timmeeh 17

Tuesday 27 December 2011 3:02

It may hurt, but if you can repeat it you'll probably have a successful circus act on your hands.

bizarre_ftw 21

Tuesday 27 December 2011 3:18

Look on the bright side, apparently your nose can be used as a deadly weapon :) Got any enemies? People that annoy you? No, you can not find my specific location from my profile, only my email, so don't try ;) Good luck with your blueberry assassinations otherwise