Animals: Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep.... - FML

By Anonymous - 06/08/2009 11:11 - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 441

You deserved it 59

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Top comments

PityFool 0

Thursday 6 August 2009 20:02

I'm impressed! I've not gotten that far yet.

LordJilly 0

Thursday 6 August 2009 20:03

Your boyfriend sounds awesome!

Comments

tkiero 0

Friday 7 August 2009 6:47

that is the funniest thing it sounds like something my best friend would do to his girl

magootissa 0

Friday 7 August 2009 7:10

OMG when i first read your FML i thought you said " IN me while I sleep" and not "ON me while I sleep" (I'm french and i'm not in USA since a long time I always mixed up in and on...) I promise this FML is way funny and you actually understand it right =)

magootissa 0

Friday 7 August 2009 7:15

My last sentence should be : I promise this FML is a lot more fun when you actually understand it right =) sorry about that..

skgirl 0

Friday 7 August 2009 7:15

omg i could imagain my boy friend doing that.. this is funny not fml haha

MatthewAllMighty 0

Friday 7 August 2009 7:25

eh, that's not that bad.

Mastercody 0

Friday 7 August 2009 7:50

your boyfriend is awesome!

el_puncho 0

Friday 7 August 2009 7:52

lmao! so random

Boxingsweets 0

Friday 7 August 2009 7:56

Lmao that's hilarious!! Not an FML.

were_giraffe 2

Friday 7 August 2009 8:06

That made me giggle

bmx5S5 0

Friday 7 August 2009 8:15

why is this an fml

mndz_mkl 0

Friday 7 August 2009 8:29

R O T F L C O P T E R !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Keywords

Cheating Love Relatable Work Money My ex Jealousy Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. Her phone rang, and she stopped to answer it. It was her ex-boyfriend, calling her from jail. She talked to him for 15 minutes. To top it all off, before she hung up, I heard her tell him she loved him, and couldn't wait for him to get out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 820

You deserved it 4 306

Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 668

You deserved it 3 982

The Top

Today, I had to clean my walls with those Mr Clean Magic Sponges because we were having visitors. I got bored and started drawing penises with it because they would leave wet marks. There is nothing magic about how slow they dry when your visitors come an hour early. They saw all ten of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 439

You deserved it 65 956

Today, my parents tricked me by claiming we were going on holiday, but stopped at grandma"s first, "just to say hi", then left me there with my bags. They dumped me with grandma and went on holiday without me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 336

You deserved it 159

Today, my boyfriend told me about this guy who makes balloon animals with his penis. My boyfriend has spent the last 4 hours trying to make his penis look like a pretzel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 714

You deserved it 4 479

Today, for the fifth time in a row, I woke up screaming from a nightmare. My mother burst into my room, leaned in real close and said, "So help me God, if you do not stop fucking screaming, I will rip your arms off and beat you with them." I’m never sleeping again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 143

You deserved it 226

Today, I sprayed hair spray under my arms instead of anti-perspirant. I didn't realize it until I went to put my shirt on and couldn't raise my arms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 086

You deserved it 10 961

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I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 700