Animals: Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our... - FML

By btg - 06/02/2010 06:27 - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 273

You deserved it 3 567

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By B'Dawk - 14/10/2018 13:30

Today, I found out my girlfriend has been putting boogers in my belly button when I don't pay attention to her while we watch tv. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 696

You deserved it 1 694

By jeesh - 31/01/2009 11:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 970

You deserved it 89 321

By davincourt - 29/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Apollo Beach

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 282

You deserved it 3 004

Caught in 4K

By buggermonster - 16/06/2009 23:37 - United States

Today, while I was at my girlfriend's parents' house for dinner, and I thought no one was looking, I picked my nose and put it underneath my chair. Turns out she has a little brother who found it appropriate to point at me and scream, "Booger monster, Booger monster!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 733

You deserved it 76 862

By i fking love docb - 04/11/2012 21:16 - Virgin Islands, U.S. - Christiansted

Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 785

You deserved it 3 345

You what?

By whattheheck - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 616

You deserved it 3 566

By HaleyIsabelle - 08/03/2010 20:54 - France

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 462

You deserved it 3 712

By UUUGHHH - 05/02/2016 20:33 - France - Villejuif

Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 167

You deserved it 2 718

By Anonymous - 30/08/2015 00:06 - Canada - Newmarket

Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 707

You deserved it 2 203

Psycho

By dating a psycho - 03/02/2022 08:00

Today, I learned that when my girlfriend was a kid, she enjoyed torturing animals for fun. Nice to know she was lying when she said the idea of harming an animal “makes her sick to her stomach.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 965

You deserved it 118

Next

Top comments

nicola1233 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 12:08

f your dogs life

Snow_Daisy 7

Saturday 6 February 2010 12:07

gross!

Comments

kikiholt 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 5:42

Please say you broke up with her. That is wrong on so many levels.

superpickle4011 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 5:48

ha ha ha i think that is funny but did she tell u this or did u just catch her doing it

Mahyar 2

Sunday 7 February 2010 5:56

Um what the ****.... **** your life lol weird ass girlfriend

jakeumz 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 6:37

gross dump her ass

mopararmy 0

Monday 8 February 2010 1:58

THATS DISGUSTING !!!

XenonPhone 0

Monday 8 February 2010 4:16

I'm writing a very strongly worded letter to PETA right now! LOL. Ewww....and then she touches you with her fingers that have been in her nose and the dog's mouth....puke!

WhoDatNation96 0

Monday 8 February 2010 6:33

How hold is your girlfriend

TotchiNeko 0

Monday 8 February 2010 6:46

lol

dugumit 0

Monday 8 February 2010 7:02

your girlfriends a dirty bitch

Riyu55 0

Monday 8 February 2010 7:13

girls have boogers?

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Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, after two months of being broken up, and my ex still insisting she hadn't been cheating on me, I declared via text my intention to burn the rest of her stuff in the yard. This resulted in the guy she "hadn't been cheating on me with" kicking in my door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 516

You deserved it 389

Today, my laptop was slow so I used my husband’s laptop. I went to the bedroom and found it opened, so I moved the trackpad and it powered on. The first thing I see is a page with redhead porn, and another tab with nude redheads. You know who else is a redhead? The new girl at his job he tells me not to worry about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 132

The Top

Today, I discovered the real reason my husband was distraught last week and has been acting moodily ever since. An attractive girl he was secretly having sex chats with online confessed to him that "she" was actually a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 863

You deserved it 4 575

Today, my friend is upset with me since I never want to hang out at her house or eat her food. The problem is she has multiple dog beds in her kitchen and a cat litter box under her dining room table. I love her and invite her to hang out other places, but she’s still offended I won’t go to her’s. FML

I agree, your life sucks 938

You deserved it 149

Today, I was swimming in a public pool, and I felt a tug on my swimming trunks. It was my grandma snorkeling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 740

You deserved it 1 224

Today, some jackass spider decided to lay eggs behind my wall. No matter how many I kill, I always wake up to multiple baby spiders on my ceiling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 395

You deserved it 126

Today, I found out I'm allergic to bug repellent. So instead of having a couple of itchy bug bites, my skin feels like it's on fire and is violently itchy everywhere the repellent has touched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 873

You deserved it 2 971

Today, my coworker doesn't want to go to lunch with me anymore, after I lost a load of weight in lockdown and she's still "overweight." Apparently, I've "changed, and not the same person." FML

I agree, your life sucks 772

You deserved it 70