Kids: Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told... - FML

By Pumpkin - 18/07/2009 02:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 205

You deserved it 102 950

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Same thing different taste

By parent - 08/03/2018 01:30

Today, I found out that my son has been telling me he's gay so we would allow the "female friend" who is actually his girlfriend to stay over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 224

You deserved it 2 830

By anonymous - 19/08/2013 05:41 - United States - Lamar

Today, I found my dad drunk, sitting on the bathroom floor crying. When I asked him why, he said, "My son is gay." I'm his only child, and I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 385

You deserved it 3 058

By Mom - 25/07/2009 21:14 - United States

Today, my son decided to come out of the closet by wearing a shirt that said "Mom, I'm gay" to the family reunion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 889

You deserved it 26 223

Get with the times

By Anonymous - 01/11/2009 17:51 - United States

Today, I found out that my daughter is dating my boss's daughter. I found this out because my extremely homophobic boss told me and wants me to 'heal' them or get fired. I didn't even know my daughter was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 222

You deserved it 3 378

Bad thought

By Anonymous - 24/12/2019 03:00 - United States - Longmont

Today, I found out that my parents have thought I'm lesbian for at least a year. I now understand why my dad has been trying to get me to "hang out" with his co-worker's daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 847

You deserved it 202

Misunderstood

By not a phobe - 16/07/2020 08:02

Today, my son told our whole family and all our friends that I kicked him out for being gay. I kicked him out because on more than one occasion he got drunk and sneaked random men in the house while he was supposed to be watching his younger siblings while I worked nights. They believed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 366

You deserved it 271

Mixed messages

By mook - 15/07/2009 19:33 - United States

Today, my neighbor confessed to me that he was homophobic and regrets that his family doesn't know it. He spent fifteen minutes explaining how much he would hate to have a gay child. I spent two hours last night convincing his son that it was the right thing to tell his family he was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 263

You deserved it 5 694

By Jason - 05/02/2018 15:30 - United States - Kenai

Today, I found out that my girlfriend is actually a man. Not a transgender person, I'm okay with that, but an actual gay man who gets a kick out of pranking other guys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 547

You deserved it 1 019

Denial

By TedX - 19/08/2020 20:07

Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 659

You deserved it 247

Trans women are women

By whoops - 03/10/2020 05:06

Today, my son brought his new girlfriend home. I took him aside and hugged him, reassuring him that I loved and accepted him no matter his sexual preference. He looked at me confused and asked what I meant. His girl was obviously trans, but he had no idea. I didn’t know he didn’t know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 896

You deserved it 366

Next

Top comments

imamonster1 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:08

yeah this kid is a champ.

Sirrush 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:08

haha, that's a great idea, very original. But seriously, if you were a bit open minded with him you could have avoided this... I'm also kinda wondering just how you found out.

Comments

magichateball 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:39

Heroic win for the son! YDI for you!

stephane_fml 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:44

son: 1 + 2n (n being the number of girls that he managed to take to his room.) you: 0 AND PEOPLE, THE WORLD REVOLVES AROUND US TEENS STFU

RadioactiveGirl 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 14:09

"AND PEOPLE, THE WORLD REVOLVES AROUND US TEENS STFU" Yeah, keep thinking that...

dan81892 2

Saturday 18 July 2009 19:10

you forgot to tell us what y and f are

magichateball 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 3:21

AND PEOPLE, THE WORLD REVOLVES AROUND US TEENS STFU you only wish it did...

mikeylikesit 0

Wednesday 9 June 2010 23:27

Ouch, math pwn

fucentarmal 1

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:44

the fml is that your son is a manipulative prick. you really don't come out to your parents to"get over" shock value wouldn't be quite so bad, but still bad...you should try to reason with him about what thought process you had to go through thinking that he was gay. i don't mean in a closed minded homophobia sense, but in a parental hopes dreams expectations sense.

stephane_fml 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:49

#33 stfu this isnt counceling

Logan_Sylar 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:50

That is just too awesome. If I had a child and he did that I would probably still kick his ass, but not as rough for being so clever.

ghettob 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:56

you son is a ****** super hero

burb_fml 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:57

Hahaha, what a smart kid.

tvspeedy07 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:59

.........well at least he's not gay?

Jonno8825 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 13:09

smart kid, he should get a medal

chocogatto12 3

Saturday 18 July 2009 13:11

stfu #38 & Props to the son, even if he is a manipulative horny liar

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The Top

Today, one of my debate opponents used the "Bill O'Reilly defense" against my arguments. This involved saying "You can't explain that" about easily explainable stuff, and speaking louder and louder to drown out my voice. He ended up getting a better grade than mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 163

You deserved it 3 436

Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 485

You deserved it 38 931

The Top

Today, it's my birthday. My father didn't get me a birthday present or do anything for me, and acted as though he only came to visit because it was expected. Yet when it was his birthday a couple months ago, he expected me to take him out and pay for it FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 717

You deserved it 227

Today, I watched "The Vow" with my girlfriend. When the movie ended, we walked out to the theatre's lobby, and I heard her mutter, "I deserve a guy like him." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 627

You deserved it 10 320

Today, my neighbor called me a lucky bastard and said he heard me getting my wife off last night. I was too ashamed to admit the sounds he was referring to were from my 17-year-old daughter after a wasp flew through her bedroom window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 217

You deserved it 2 411

Today, I was going down the elevator in my dorm and a friend joined on another floor. He then thought it was a good time to tell me that he slept with my girlfriend when the elevator got stuck. Worst 40 minutes of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 703

You deserved it 1 615

Today, my mother-in-law visited the house while my husband and I were at work. When we returned, we discovered she'd shredded and thrown away all the scribbled on papers sprawled on our messy desks. We're graphics designers. Those were rough sketches for about 14 different clients. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 416

You deserved it 3 695

Today, I opened a lesson with the phrase, "As we all know, the world is over 4 billion years old." One of my students immediately snorted and said, in all seriousness, that I was wrong, and that the Earth is only 6000 years old. A few of his classmates agreed. I teach geology at university. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 707

You deserved it 251