Love: Today, I found out that my wife is pregnant again. During her...

By Anonymous - 22/02/2012 19:55 - Canada

Today, I found out that my wife is pregnant again. During her last two pregnancies, she craved pop-tarts and screamed bloody murder at the drop of a hat, so I went out and bought a box for her. Turns out that this time, pop-tarts make her want to puke. Cue screaming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 144

You deserved it 4 534

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/12/2014 21:47 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 339

You deserved it 5 290

You BASTARD!

By moosemay - 02/04/2013 15:04 - Germany

Today, suffering from severe morning sickness followed by cravings for salty food, I had stacked our fridge with yummy snacks. When finally emerging from our bathroom after retching this morning, I found out my husband had eaten all my snacks the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 743

You deserved it 4 426

Hormonal

By Anonymous - 31/03/2024 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife is experiencing feral pregnancy cravings. She is craving some sort of cookie that she used to eat as a child. That particular cookie company went out of business 20 years ago, so my wife is growling at me like I was personally responsible for them shutting down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 123

By Anonymous - 27/10/2013 16:08 - United States - Ballwin

Today, my wife ate nothing all day due to her morning sickness, but I tried to get her to eat something light, for our baby's sake. I brought her a banana. She yelled at me for being a "pervert" and accused me of just wanting to watch her stick a phallic object in her mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 075

You deserved it 5 499

By mokki - 31/03/2015 12:56 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I am seven months pregnant with my third child. I woke up to my two-and-a-half year old trying to "pop the balloon" in my tummy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 268

You deserved it 3 534

By Scott - 15/09/2011 07:34 - United States

Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 292

You deserved it 6 419

The bed is lava

By for better or for farts - 06/08/2020 23:01

Today, my very pregnant wife woke up in bed, grabbing her stomach and writhing in pain. Worried that the baby might be in distress, I asked her what was wrong. She gasped then let out what can only be described as a river of hot liquid shit all over herself and my legs. We both cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 408

You deserved it 207

Baby fever

By mala_19 - 06/07/2023 18:00 - Sweden - Burea

Today, I've eaten two pieces of fruit, three crackers, and 3.5 glasses of juice. I've also vomited 3 times and peed myself once. Can someone please tell me why I thought it would be a good idea to get pregnant again? FML

I agree, your life sucks 434

You deserved it 654

Off script

By Going hungry - 28/07/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, my fiancee asked me to text her a grocery list. I asked for meat, fruit, vegetables, you know, the staples. She came back with tons of sugar cereal, pop tarts, cookie dough, and other unhealthy crap. We have no other food, our monthly budget is gone, and junk food gives me horrible stomach cramps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 170

Crackers

By crazycrochetlady - 17/12/2018 20:00

Today, I'm 7 weeks pregnant. For the first time in a week, I feel well enough to eat something that isn't cheerios, a bagel, or crackers. I woke up 2 hours after going to bed with the shits. I'm almost convinced this kid hates me already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 238

You deserved it 272

idontknowyou123 0

Thursday 23 February 2012 0:12

Only one solution... FALCOOON PUUUUNNCH

GVirdi 11

Thursday 23 February 2012 0:42

36 I was thinking condoms

Comments

ilove80smetal 8

Thursday 23 February 2012 3:19

Bat meets stomach. Problem solved. (for the record I'm anti abortion believer)

Cmcnab1997 0

Thursday 23 February 2012 3:23

FALCOON KICK!

legresley85 1

Thursday 23 February 2012 3:24

Speaking as a woman, that's was very sweet of you. Just keep being that sweet and you'll be fine.

KaiserSD 8

Thursday 23 February 2012 3:26

FYL dude, nothing worse than a pregnant woman who abuses her condition. Grit your teeth and try not to punch her in the uterus.

ajourdhui 0

Thursday 23 February 2012 6:38

Men should be kicked in the balls with stiletto heels when they make comments like this.

KatieKupcake4195 9

Thursday 23 February 2012 3:35

Ptshh! My boyfriend says I'm grumpy and moody when I'm on my period. I admit that I can be a little because I get tired and hungry and am in pain, but I'm never as bad as OP's wife. Yes, I'm very aware that periods and pregnancy are two different things. I'm just saying that my hormones never make me as bad as OP's wife. I'm sure pregnancy hormones are much much stronger than when a girl is on her period though. Congrats on the baby OP :)

PennyLane27 32

Thursday 23 February 2012 3:37

Poor you AND poor wife!! Usually that stuff doesn't happen till later on, b ut everyone's different. A lot of stuff is going on with her, she doesn't -want- to feel that way toward stuff. You can do it, just remember it's only temporary insanity :o)