Kids: Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently,... - FML

By omg - 25/03/2011 00:43 - Canada

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 615

You deserved it 8 721

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Same thing different taste

By It was the 11 year old - 21/07/2012 08:00 - United States - Austin

Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 911

You deserved it 5 033

By Laurel - 25/05/2013 04:37 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I got to take my 10-year-old son to the junior high school at which I teach. When my students questioned him about what I was like at home, he told the entire class: "Well, she farts all the time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 911

You deserved it 9 073

What up big pimps?

By Anonymous - 05/05/2023 12:00

Today, I just got done being yelled at by my son's headteacher and a bunch of parents, all because my 6 year-old son has been arranging kiss dates between his classmates in exchange for sweets and so on. My little pimp in training. Not a proud dad moment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 828

You deserved it 198

By Jay - 04/11/2017 04:00

Today, I got called into the principal's office of my son's school. Why? He'd called his teacher a "fudge packer". No more weekends with his uncle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 293

You deserved it 365

By Bad Mommy - 21/06/2012 05:40 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I found out from her teacher that my daughter in kindergarten gets the little boys in her class to play grown-ups with her. It's basically dry humping and groaning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 328

You deserved it 9 432

By Anonymous - 17/09/2014 21:57 - United States - Dewitt

Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 560

You deserved it 4 699

By stressedmom36 - 13/08/2015 23:50 - United States - Tampa

Today, my 4-year-old son's daycare called because he kissed a few girls. They explained he can't walk up and kiss little girls. I thought the situation was under control, until I was called an hour later to remove him from the premises for kissing little boys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 399

You deserved it 2 780

Kids will be kids

By Anonymous - 26/04/2022 18:00 - United States

Today, I learned my son has been picking on a girl he has a crush on. He apparently went too far, because she finally snapped and beat him up at recess. The teacher, who knew about this from the beginning and actively did nothing, is trying to throw me under the bus for being oblivious to my son's behavior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 007

You deserved it 507

Market crash

By Anonymous - 17/09/2019 20:00 - New Zealand - Wellington

Today, my son took some of my underwear to school. What's worse is he sold it to his classmate for $10. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 775

You deserved it 191

By tenniemo - 10/08/2019 14:00

Today, I caught one of my students checking out my butt while I was helping another student at his table. I teach 8th grade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 466

You deserved it 413

Next

Top comments

splice520 4

Friday 25 March 2011 9:08

future pimp

enonymous 8

Friday 25 March 2011 9:14

So did the teacher get a discount?

Comments

rburke42016 0

Friday 25 March 2011 17:03

so awesome!! not for you obviously but for us reading haha

1beto3 0

Friday 25 March 2011 17:03

haha man so early they start

summa 0

Friday 25 March 2011 17:10

are you people retarded, I have a younger sister that age!!! that's just sick!!!

awmy 2

Friday 25 March 2011 17:12

lmao ur son's a little player haha :D

jk9037 0

Friday 25 March 2011 17:14

This kid is going places .

kingjames2306 0

Sunday 27 March 2011 22:31

yeah most likly prison someday

sjch 0

Friday 25 March 2011 17:24

This is not funny, and people who are praising your son are disgusting. What if he were a little girl and she was charging boys to let them touch her? Everyone's reactions would have been completely different. I really hope you are doing something to stop this kind of behavior.

awardZu 0

Friday 25 March 2011 19:59

Exactly! I have two daughters, and if I found out that this kind of crap was going on around either of them, I would be extremely pissed! If they ever tried that crap, I'd home school their asses and find out who the hell taught them that shit, then file every charge that I could against them!

Casey777 0

Saturday 26 March 2011 3:28

your an idiot so what if it were a girl you tard

kingjames2306 0

Saturday 26 March 2011 8:23

171 you are right people that dont have kids dont understand i have a daughter but shes still very little so i got a few yrs till shes in school i will flip big time if this were to go on in her grade or school

kayvan 8

Friday 25 March 2011 17:32

That's an enterprising young man!

selfgratman 0

Friday 25 March 2011 17:39

this kid is legit

lmw562 3

Friday 25 March 2011 17:40

awwww you raised a little stud!

thecovert 7

Friday 25 March 2011 17:49

Future president!!

zanysage 0

Friday 25 March 2011 21:29

Errrr. Canadians don't have a President

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, my husband threw a bitch-fit and made passive aggressive remarks throughout the entire day. What did I do? Call him out on commenting an eggplant, peach, and winky face emoji under a female friend’s picture. He deactivated all social media accounts and shouted, “Are you happy now? I can’t talk to anyone now!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 96

Today, I told my son to get a job and start paying rent. Five minutes later he transferred me rent for the next 5 years. When I demanded to know where he got that kind of money, he showed me his bank statements. He’s made more money mining Bitcoin than I’ve made in 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 273

You deserved it 1 363

The Top

Today, I told my dad I wasn’t feeling well, to which his response was to interrupt me and say, “Nope. Not buying it.” I have never faked an illness in my life, and this time I vomited in front of my entire class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 054

You deserved it 106

Today, I, a man in his 40s, had to be taken to the hospital because I was laughing so hard at an old Disney movie that my diaphragm went into spasms. I stopped breathing and passed out for a few minutes, and my son had to call an ambulance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 014

You deserved it 434

Today, my son proudly announced to me that he has been learning to cut out shapes at school, and that he'd cut out some ovals and wanted to show me. He showed me the pictures of Washington, Lincoln, Jefferson and Jackson and their corresponding bills. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 873

You deserved it 261

Today, my husband came home with a Christmas gift from a coworker. It's the same thing I got him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 121

You deserved it 3 375

Today, I went to the hospital, which was super busy. I did a pee test when I first arrived. After 5 hours of waiting, they told me they'd lost my pee. How do you lose someone's piss? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 786

You deserved it 126

Today, the girl I have been dating for the past couple months broke it off with me. She said she's tired of waiting around for me and being ignored in the mean time. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have been so greedy as to finish my 2 degrees and work 2 jobs to pay for my school. How selfish of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 511

You deserved it 18 936