By karmaplz - 23/02/2011 14:26 - United States
karmaplz tells us more.
I feel the need to clear up some of this discussion! First of all--thanks to all these anon. people for defending me. I honestly submitted this immediately after getting the phone call @ 8:30 am, never thinking it'd be posted. Secondly-- is he a bad guy? No. I'm sure if being a cop is what he wants to do, and has his heart in it, he'll do great at his job. As far as the disrespect: it got to a point where I wasn't valued as a person, and some very vulgar, vile, rude and hurtful things were said/done to me, that wouldn't have been done if I was respected for who I am. If I was seen as a human with a heart and feelings, these things wouldn't have been done. Can I say that this will never happen to another female? No. Do I think he's pure evil? No. Saying bad things would have been purely vengeful and ruined a potential career. Also, I wasn't listed a reference, they required names and phone numbers of "significant relationships"--- I was asked if there was ever an assault between us, and about his moral character. That's it. I've had a seriously great laugh over realizing this was actually posted, and loved reading all the comments. Thanks!
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Comments
You are allowed to decline to answer. No one forced you to say anything good or bad about the guy
You didnt have to be nice. Personally I would have just straight up told them. If he.couldnt respect you how is he.going to respect anyone else
You are a decent person. That was a good thing you did
You could of just lied and said bad things...revenge is sweet ya know!
I would've just acted like I didn't know who they were talking about.
I would've cut his ass down! No better revenge.
YDI Op, if he disrespected you in any way or just isn't a good person you shouldn't lie about him, especially when it's something like him being or not becoming a cop.
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Why didn't you just tell them bad things?
As someone who knows a fair amount about the hiring process, you should have told them he was disrespectful. It is NOT grounds for disqualification, but it would give them a realistic idea about who he was. They would talk to him about it, but that doesn't mean they would DQ him. You should have been honest.