Kids: Today, I got a phone call from my 6-year-old son's school telling...

By Uproar - 17/10/2012 23:00 - Iceland

Today, I got a phone call from my 6-year-old son's school telling me they were concerned about him as he wouldn't stop barking at the radiator. After talking to my husband about it, I found out he's been teaching him so he could see the look on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 985

You deserved it 2 220

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Same thing different taste

By Laurel - 25/05/2013 04:37 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I got to take my 10-year-old son to the junior high school at which I teach. When my students questioned him about what I was like at home, he told the entire class: "Well, she farts all the time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 911

You deserved it 9 073

By Amber - 10/01/2010 17:17 - United States

Today, I found out why my bathroom has been smelling so bad. My 10-year-old son has been peeing on the radiator, thinking it's fun to watch it steam and sizzle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 157

You deserved it 3 276

By Anonymous - 23/09/2015 15:48 - United States - Bedminster

Today, I got an angry call from my 7-year-old son's school. It turned out that while doing a "what I want to be when I'm older" assignment, he wrote that he wants to be an internet troll so he can make people mad and make them kill themselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 418

You deserved it 4 330

By SadDad - 22/09/2012 18:11 - United States - Alexandria

Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 369

You deserved it 9 816

By Mumbling Mutt101 - 15/08/2011 06:23 - Australia

Today, I came home to find a window broken and my neighbours searching inside my house. Apparently, they'd heard a small child asking for help inside my house. I recently taught my dog to "talk." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 479

You deserved it 5 877

By unnamed - 26/07/2011 03:19 - United States

Today, I called my seven-year old son to help me with the ice-maker on the fridge because it wasn't working. Without even pausing, he turned the child lock off and started laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 518

You deserved it 39 210

By Anonymous - 19/04/2013 23:33 - Sweden - Ljungby

Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 145

You deserved it 6 039

What's up doc?

By fml - 29/07/2012 12:20 - Japan - Koshigaya

Today, I took my 2-year-old son to the ear doctor, since he'd stopped responding whenever I call him. The doctor told me that his ears are just fine. He's just ignoring me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 682

You deserved it 5 852

By blah blah daddy - 02/10/2010 23:08 - United States

Today, I picked up my four year old son from daycare. As I was putting him in his car seat, I asked him if he had fun. He yelled, "Shut it, bitch!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 425

You deserved it 10 379

Good boy

By anonymous - 16/03/2011 02:05

Today, I got a call from my five-year-old son's principal. My son had pooped in the schoolyard, then gave the teacher a Ziploc bag, and commanded her to pick it up. He said he was trying to imitate our dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 181

You deserved it 6 157

XKXKKXK 10

Thursday 18 October 2012 8:31

He always told you he just wanted a dog. Now look what he's done.

CrewBoy 10

Thursday 18 October 2012 8:32

Well, I guess it's time to get him neutered.

Comments

hamrtym 15

Thursday 18 October 2012 8:41

And I bet it was priceless!

perdix 29

Thursday 18 October 2012 8:44

I hope the look on your face was exceptionally entertaining, because your kid's going to be placed in therapy for years and pigeonholed as emotionally disturbed, maybe even psychotic. Your asshole husband should have stuck to pranks that don't ruin you kid's life. Whoopee cushion, anyone?

flockz 19

Thursday 18 October 2012 9:13

i have a wall of shredded whoopee cushions. the bastards never learn my seat can never be taken. i love hearing the last ounces of air escape from their tiny lung as the curvature of my ass crushes them. my therapist just doesn't understand me. neither does society. but i will not stop until i kill them all.

zenshu_fml 3

Thursday 18 October 2012 16:43

I really hope that you don't seriously believe that a 6 year old acting like a dog is going to have him institutionalized and make him mentally deficient... If so you really need to come out of your protective bubble and join the real world.