Miscellaneous: Today, I had an important oral report to deliver with a partner....

By Jamestown of Vagina - 13/09/2014 14:36 - United States - Houston

Today, I had an important oral report to deliver with a partner. Not only did he come in late and high, he pronounced Virginia as "Vagina" the whole way through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 663

You deserved it 3 728

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Same thing different taste

High times

By Anonymous - 23/01/2016 10:09 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 035

You deserved it 1 635

By Torvaltz - 07/08/2016 08:31 - United States - Clinton

Today, during an important meeting, I forgot the name for West Virginia and described it as, "Virginia a bit to the left". FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 624

You deserved it 3 289

Great opener

By Anonymous - 17/05/2012 20:14 - United States - Champlin

Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated, "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 679

You deserved it 29 309

Delirious

By CanIGoHomeNow - 18/07/2021 08:01

Today, while not feeling well at work, I had to finish up some papers. I was so out of it, I couldn't remember how to spell my name. I had to improvise by pronouncing each syllable of my name out loud. My boss now thinks I'm a dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 819

You deserved it 272

I'm doing the thing

By Anonymous - 16/08/2018 03:30

Today, I failed a final presentation. My partner, who did none of the research, presented the entire project, talking over me and glaring when I spoke up. He denied everything and the professor didn't believe me. Now I have to retake this class with the same professor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 610

You deserved it 287

Many such cases

By Anonymous - 17/10/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I wanted to look clever during a work meeting, so I used a thesaurus to find a fancy word for “important.” I ended up calling a project "pivotal" but mispronounced it as "pee-votal" in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63

You deserved it 628

By MGDS - 14/12/2013 05:52 - United States - Pine Grove

Today, I had to take an oral examination. I made it to the last part of the exam, then violently threw up in the middle of my answer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 192

You deserved it 3 269

By FartMyLife - 11/08/2016 11:34 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, the VP of my company stopped by my desk to personally deliver praise on my recent performance. I watched in helpless horror as the noxious fart I had just released slapped him in the face. He was too polite to leave but gagged through his entire speech. If farts can kill careers... FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 955

You deserved it 2 165

Business casual

By Anonymous - 08/04/2013 08:30

Today, I had a lunch meeting with important people from my company. While drinking from my wine glass someone cracked a joke, causing me to snort a fountain of wine all over my lap, splashing the people next to me. The horrified look on my boss's face sitting opposite me said everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 260

You deserved it 5 588

By Me - 20/12/2016 01:40 - United States - Canyon Lake

Today, while reading out loud in front of my entire class and teacher, I learned that I can't pronounce the word 'success'. It came out as 'sex', and when I tried to correct myself more slowly (multiple times), it came out 'sexsex'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 939

You deserved it 1 213

icnburbbygrl 23

Saturday 13 September 2014 23:02

Ah yes, the state of ****** was founded in 1770

Thinkitthrough 23

Saturday 13 September 2014 23:03

Horrible partners... something most of us can relate to. unless you are the the bad partner in which case we hate you

Comments

Khaleesi_26 30

Sunday 14 September 2014 0:06

Nerves? Sucks to be you OP. Hope you still did good on your report though!

thevelociraptor 31

Sunday 14 September 2014 6:12

Maybe he was just high? Or nerves. Ya, that makes sense.

metroido 17

Tuesday 21 December 2021 2:37

In my experience, if your partner does poorly, then YOU will get a bad grade as well. No exceptions.

froggyjade 16

Sunday 14 September 2014 0:20

Freud would have a lot to say about this

Ichiya 29

Sunday 14 September 2014 14:40

Even most psychologists think Freud was crazy.

johbstonjacob 8

Sunday 14 September 2014 0:32

Dont you just love it when you do all of the work and they ruin it anyways? Me too!

Sharibrieezy 6

Sunday 14 September 2014 0:36

Virginia needs a name change anyways. There are far too many peninsulas for it to still be a virgin.

Zebediabolical 39

Sunday 14 September 2014 8:32

The only thing sluttier than a peninsula is an ithmus. And then only barely.

blindguy29 6

Sunday 14 September 2014 1:44

**** her right in the pussy

trellz17 19

Sunday 14 September 2014 2:07

Haha ******

christian1509 21

Sunday 14 September 2014 2:07

Did he get caught?

cole_tyler42 21

Sunday 14 September 2014 2:37

Am I the only one bothered by the severe grammatical error in the FML?

AZ_Hockey_Dude 20

Sunday 14 September 2014 3:44

That's my boy!!

dakatabg 31

Sunday 14 September 2014 4:18

Very intelligent partner

Keywords

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The Top

Today, while sitting at my desk at work, a co-worker asked for my help. It was only after I had walked over to his desk, bent over, answered his question, and walked back to my stall, that I felt a breeze. My tube top had slid down across my breasts, revealing my bra to the entire office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 870

You deserved it 43 621

Today, during a intense orgasm I screamed, "You're my God!" at my husband. Afterwards, he told me I was blasphemous and reminded me that God smites those with false prophets. Needless to say, I think I'll just keep my mouth shut in the future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 543

You deserved it 181

The Top

Today, I had a virtual interview for my dream job. Prepared as f**k. One of the interviewers turned out to be my ex, who I dumped for being too dumb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 959

You deserved it 528

Today, an informal lender came, greeting me a good morning with an "I'm here to take that car in your garage." Appalled, I demanded an explanation. Apparently, Mom took a rather substantial loan from him 3 months ago, paid him ziltch, and declared the car as collateral. It's my wife's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 825

You deserved it 251

Today, I went to my kid's band concert. She's 12 and in the advanced team. They were the first ones to play and they were so incredibly bad that I laughed. Really, really loud. I was escorted out of the recital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 318

You deserved it 7 434

Today, I changed the date of my birthday to today on Facebook to see how many people actually know my birthday. My mom wished me a happy birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 669

You deserved it 15 761

Today, a judge gave my ex custody of my two sons, most of my money, my house, my car, and has ordered me to take anger management classes. We're getting a divorce because she shot me with a gun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 484

You deserved it 674

Today, I was on a date in a fancy restaurant. I tried to show off my skills by ordering our meal in French, since some of the dishes had french-sounding names. The waiter replied in fluent French and I have no idea what he said. FML

I agree, your life sucks 142

You deserved it 1 225