Miscellaneous: Today, I had an important oral report to deliver with a partner....

By Jamestown of Vagina - 13/09/2014 14:36 - United States - Houston

Today, I had an important oral report to deliver with a partner. Not only did he come in late and high, he pronounced Virginia as "Vagina" the whole way through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 663

You deserved it 3 728

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Same thing different taste

High times

By Anonymous - 23/01/2016 10:09 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 035

You deserved it 1 635

By Torvaltz - 07/08/2016 08:31 - United States - Clinton

Today, during an important meeting, I forgot the name for West Virginia and described it as, "Virginia a bit to the left". FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 624

You deserved it 3 289

Great opener

By Anonymous - 17/05/2012 20:14 - United States - Champlin

Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated, "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 679

You deserved it 29 309

Delirious

By CanIGoHomeNow - 18/07/2021 08:01

Today, while not feeling well at work, I had to finish up some papers. I was so out of it, I couldn't remember how to spell my name. I had to improvise by pronouncing each syllable of my name out loud. My boss now thinks I'm a dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 819

You deserved it 272

I'm doing the thing

By Anonymous - 16/08/2018 03:30

Today, I failed a final presentation. My partner, who did none of the research, presented the entire project, talking over me and glaring when I spoke up. He denied everything and the professor didn't believe me. Now I have to retake this class with the same professor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 610

You deserved it 287

Many such cases

By Anonymous - 17/10/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I wanted to look clever during a work meeting, so I used a thesaurus to find a fancy word for “important.” I ended up calling a project "pivotal" but mispronounced it as "pee-votal" in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63

You deserved it 628

By MGDS - 14/12/2013 05:52 - United States - Pine Grove

Today, I had to take an oral examination. I made it to the last part of the exam, then violently threw up in the middle of my answer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 192

You deserved it 3 269

By FartMyLife - 11/08/2016 11:34 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, the VP of my company stopped by my desk to personally deliver praise on my recent performance. I watched in helpless horror as the noxious fart I had just released slapped him in the face. He was too polite to leave but gagged through his entire speech. If farts can kill careers... FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 955

You deserved it 2 165

Business casual

By Anonymous - 08/04/2013 08:30

Today, I had a lunch meeting with important people from my company. While drinking from my wine glass someone cracked a joke, causing me to snort a fountain of wine all over my lap, splashing the people next to me. The horrified look on my boss's face sitting opposite me said everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 260

You deserved it 5 588

By Me - 20/12/2016 01:40 - United States - Canyon Lake

Today, while reading out loud in front of my entire class and teacher, I learned that I can't pronounce the word 'success'. It came out as 'sex', and when I tried to correct myself more slowly (multiple times), it came out 'sexsex'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 939

You deserved it 1 213

icnburbbygrl 23

Saturday 13 September 2014 23:02

Ah yes, the state of ****** was founded in 1770

Thinkitthrough 23

Saturday 13 September 2014 23:03

Horrible partners... something most of us can relate to. unless you are the the bad partner in which case we hate you

Comments

Sakuraashita 15

Sunday 14 September 2014 21:27

Fugget about it! *obscure reference alert

sevazilla 21

Monday 15 September 2014 0:42

Virginia and ****** both make sense when telling one where youre from

trendkilla254 4

Monday 15 September 2014 3:08

It's not the worst way a partner could have a horrible ****** problem.

chellebeary 5

Monday 15 September 2014 12:06

Oral report. Come. ******. I can't be the only one ....

darkfireflame 15

Monday 15 September 2014 19:36

Be sure to talk to your teacher/professor about this. Most will be willing to grade you both differently.

Mushroomtipbob 5

Tuesday 16 September 2014 6:58

i use to do the same when i was little

_delusions_ 15

Tuesday 15 September 2015 3:21

I laughed a little to hard at this.

CantTouchThat 29

Wednesday 17 May 2017 19:11

What's wrong with doing oral on ******'s? Most people like doing it and/or recieving it.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend’s dad has a sword he inherited from his dad that he claims links their family to the old Swiss nobility. I work in a museum so I know most of the makers' marks on swords, so I’m not sure how to tell him his sword is a reproduction made in Spain less than 100 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 452

You deserved it 88

Today, my ex-girlfriend from several years ago texted me. We were having a pleasant conversation until she asked me to give advice. Apparently, her current boyfriend is incapable of talking dirty, fingering, and other sexual aspects. She asked me to give him advice and pointers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 639

You deserved it 1 196

The Top

Today, we travelled back to England to meet my fiance's family. Turns out her cousin is a guy I hated from high school. I tried to be an adult, but we began sniping insults at each other like we used to. By the end of the night, we realised we actually missed hating each other and are now, ew, frenemies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 603

You deserved it 940

Today, my tampon string was hanging from my bathing suit. My boyfriend thought it was a thread hanging from my bikini bottom. He publicly pulled out my tampon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 463 440

You deserved it 77 163

Today, my mom and I had to shovel our driveway after an epic snowstorm that left us with 22 inches of snow. We only needed to dig out my mom's car and not mine. After we did all that work and shoveled all the snow onto the side where my car was we found out my mom had a flat tire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 971

You deserved it 3 351

Today, I dropped my trash into what I thought was a garbage can. My co-workers stared at me like I had just pissed myself. It was a toy collection box for children in foster care. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 929

You deserved it 10 892

Today, my car broke down because it couldn't wait two more days for an oil change. Now it might be FUBAR. FML

I agree, your life sucks 237

You deserved it 785

Today, after “talking” and flirting with my team lead for a few months, we started dating and I quit my job, which I really liked, and started working somewhere I didn’t just so we could be together. Now, two weeks after quitting, she breaks up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 355

You deserved it 1 218