Valentine's slay, Intimate moments and Intimacy: Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. When he...

By ArsonistsLullaby - 21/09/2016 21:02 - United States

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. When he slid his penis in, he felt my NuvaRing, and with the most excitement I've ever seen a man muster, said, "Oh my god! You have your clit pierced! I can't believe I actually get to have sex with a girl who has her clit pierced!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 863

You deserved it 1 758

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Same thing different taste

Newbie

By Anonymous - 25/11/2010 18:18 - Singapore

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I was struck with a white-hot pain, and in the confusion thought her vagina had contracted hard. It turned out it was actually my uncircumcised penis retracting for the first time in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 617

You deserved it 7 746

Too much feeling!

By buckerooo - 03/12/2019 20:00

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting frisky when we decide to try the old 69. One thing leads to another when her clit ring went deep into my nose, and leaving me feeling like the wrong kind of bull. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 936

You deserved it 513

By Anonymous - 14/01/2011 20:53 - United States

Today, while playing with my cat, she decided to give me a surprise nipple piercing with her claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 253

You deserved it 5 275

Body modification

By Anonymous - 22/04/2022 14:00

Today, I got a nipple piercing. My girlfriend thought I was pranking her with a fake piercing, because I wouldn’t be "daft enough" to get a real one, and she yanked it off, or rather through, my nipple. Yes, it cut my poor nip in half, and I now have two nipples where once I had only one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 086

You deserved it 359

TMI

By Disgusted - 05/07/2009 06:30 - United States

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. I also found out from her husband that she has her nipples and nether regions pierced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 021

You deserved it 3 797

By Anonymous - 26/03/2015 10:16

Today, after days of looking for it, I finally found the ring my boyfriend gave to me. It was on my roommate's finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 667

You deserved it 2 739

By Anonymous - 18/08/2018 03:30

Today, I had sex with a guy I'd had a crush on for a long time. When I asked if he was having trouble putting it in, he answered that he was fully in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 045

You deserved it 672

Corkscrew

By Anonymous - 05/05/2021 15:01 - United States - Carson City

Today, I used a menstrual cup for the first time. I couldn't get it out, after what seemed like ages of trying. I had to ask my boyfriend to help me. He'll never look at me the same way again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 993

You deserved it 209

So romantic

By Anonymous - 30/12/2012 23:58 - United States - Denver

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me with the prettiest, most simple ring I have ever seen. I called my sister to tell her the good news, and her response was, "I know. He had me steal the ring from Claire's." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 953

You deserved it 4 061

By whatsername92 - 01/02/2013 03:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend gave me the most beautiful diamond ring I have ever seen. As I excitedly put it on my finger, he told me it wasn't an engagement ring, but I should wear it like one to keep other men away and seem "unapproachable". FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 544

You deserved it 4 559

WCARlover 34

Saturday 15 October 2016 1:06

I think the real FML is that you guys apparently didn't do any foreplay

carleybeak 21

Saturday 15 October 2016 1:01

I think it might be time for him to learn some female anatomy...

Comments

lestatsbride 3

Saturday 15 October 2016 15:33

OP, first I would like to serve as a warning, 6 years ago I got pregnant while on nuvaring. also, at least he didn't say it felt like playing ring toss. you should educate him on the fact that's your birth control not a piercing and nowhere near where your clit actually is. clit piercing in general is stupid and has a long term effect on your sex life by making sensations dull after a certain amount of time making it harder for you to "get off" by exclusively clitoral simulation. I would not recommend that to anyone.

cuz803 44

Saturday 15 October 2016 17:02

Time for ****** education

aelarol 5

Saturday 15 October 2016 18:26

Seriously how did men get control. Well at least he found the ******.

lostinareverie 21

Saturday 15 October 2016 19:32

Damn, he needs to learn anatomy and your body asap, it'll be good for you two in the long run. Besides the clit isn't hard to find....

quarterbird 18

Saturday 15 October 2016 20:33

A. Did you guys have sex in a pitch black room with no foreplay? B. Does the local community college offer remedial anatomy classes? C. Nice name... Hozier's best tune.