Kids: Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth...

By Nick - 29/06/2012 21:39 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 279

You deserved it 6 727

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Same thing different taste

By ilikecake - 29/05/2009 11:12 - United Arab Emirates

Today, it was my boyfriend's 24th birthday. His friends were throwing him a surprise party and I was in charge of getting his birthday cake. As a joke, I got it in the shape of a penis, with a graphic marzipan design. Funny, I never knew his overly-conservative parents were invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 386

You deserved it 53 424

Competition

By JaneDoe - 04/04/2013 02:51 - United States - Salisbury

Today, it was my friend's birthday, so I baked him a cake complete with his name written on it in homemade frosting. After I gave it to him, his mother berated me for it, saying I should have checked with her first before making a cake for her son. He's 28. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 756

You deserved it 2 788

The cake from hell

By Anonymous - 24/03/2023 18:00

Today, I tried to bake a cake for my friend's birthday. It turned out looking more like a science experiment gone wrong than a cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 649

You deserved it 202

Here, have this

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Crystal Lake

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 873

You deserved it 4 909

By Anonymous - 11/05/2015 16:06 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, my girlfriend surprised me with what was allegedly a birthday "cake". It was so horribly deformed, I wasn't sure whether to eat it or wear it as a hat. I had to pretend it didn't taste like play-doh, and ended up throwing it up in the toilet. Happy birthday to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 314

You deserved it 4 517

That blows

By Anonymous - 12/09/2022 23:30

Today, it's my birthday and I was very happy. When the moment came to blow the candles, all of the decoration on the cake flew off. It had taken an hour to make and set them on the cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 768

You deserved it 204

Happy intoxication day

By rubber_duckie177 - 24/09/2009 11:25 - United States

Today, my sisters and I were throwing my mom a birthday party. Since I'm not good at baking, I ordered her a really nice and expensive cake. As my daughter and I were headed out the door, she told me she had added some sprinkles to make it pretty. It was the silica beads from a package. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 160

You deserved it 4 033

By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 04:18 - United States

Today, my husband thought it would be "funny" to put laxatives in the cakes for my son's 7th birthday party. Over 40 kids came to the party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 594

You deserved it 4 112

By Devotedmom - 10/01/2016 09:07 - Belgium - Li?ge

Today, I got up at 5 am to bake a surprise birthday cake for my 16-year-old son. I put the cake on the table and went to call my son. "Surprise!" When I came back 30 seconds later, the cake was all gone and the dog was licking his lips. My son won't even believe I made a cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 058

You deserved it 3 120

By Jumja - 15/01/2010 11:37 - Netherlands

Today, I found out my boyfriend's mother has invented a new kind of cake and named it after me: not because it's delicious, but because of the amount of fat in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 211

You deserved it 5 713

lakerfan8224 17

Saturday 30 June 2012 2:38

That's going in your son's suppressed memory

Skittles_Rawr 8

Saturday 30 June 2012 2:45

You raised her... Don't blame your balls.

Comments

ohcrapitscurtis 8

Saturday 30 June 2012 4:43

There's no such thing as a bad child; just a bad parent.

phatdaddy62 23

Saturday 30 June 2012 5:20

You've never raised kids, have you?

julien672 0

Saturday 30 June 2012 10:55

79 - I've never raised kids and even I know that his sentence is bull.

nevershoutkendal_fml 10

Sunday 1 July 2012 8:29

79 and 112 - No kid comes out of the womb lying, cheating, and stealing. I disagree. It's all in how you were raised and whether or not your parents paid enough attention to you.

kiraleann 16

Saturday 30 June 2012 4:54

It disgusts me when parents come on here and describe their kids like this. You're their parent, you're mostly responsible for how they turn out. Even if they aren't the sharpest tool in the shed, it's really shitty parenting to talk about your kids like that, and I'm sure if you'll go on the internet and call your daughter a moron, you probably say similar things to her personally as well.

fordman22 0

Saturday 30 June 2012 12:47

Easy thurrr killa.

volleyballstarrr 1

Saturday 30 June 2012 5:15

lmfaoo!! my friend made a penis cake before. classssic

Jp17048 1

Saturday 30 June 2012 5:48

How old is she?

THE_A_TEEN 27

Saturday 30 June 2012 5:51

Ooo, you're so mature calling your own daughter like that on the internet. For gods sake, SHE'S YOUR DAUGHTER! Yeah she did a questionable thing, but outright calling her a moron? You're the parent, you are supposed to be the mature one here, but instead you go on a website and call your own daughter a moron. I have no sympathy for you, prick.