Health: Today, I lied to the treadmill about my weight. FML

By Holly - 05/02/2010 07:33 - United States

Today, I lied to the treadmill about my weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 778

You deserved it 35 273

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/04/2011 13:56 - United Kingdom

Today, I lied to my diary about my weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 182

You deserved it 51 650

By Anonymous - 23/11/2009 09:54 - United States

Today, I went onto the treadmill at my gym. When it prompted me to enter my age I put 27. I'm 29 and am lying about my age to a workout machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 734

You deserved it 38 816

Liar !

By Anonymous - 14/03/2020 09:00

Today, I lied and told my friends I was a compulsive liar. Well, I think I lied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 1 292

Fitness is overrated

By Frankie says relax - 10/12/2023 06:00 - United States

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. As I was on the treadmill, I accidentally hit the emergency stop button. In my attempt to play it cool, I tried to pretend it was intentional and yelled, "I've reached my fitness goal for the day!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 686

By idefka - 08/04/2017 02:00

Today, I found myself lying to my diary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 515

You deserved it 1 861

By anonymous - 24/06/2010 05:09 - United States

Today, I went running. My girlfriend was so surprised at the fact that I'm exercising that she accused me of making it up so I could cheat on her. I'm just trying to get in shape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 705

You deserved it 5 226

By Anonymous - 18/01/2015 16:34 - Ireland

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 968

You deserved it 20 687

By Anonymous - 05/01/2010 20:16 - United States

Today, I picked the treadmill next to an old man so I could feel better about myself. He ran faster and longer than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 059

You deserved it 36 592

Routine

By notsosexygirl - 21/02/2009 09:35 - United Kingdom

Today, I was doing my usual routine at the gym which consists of working out on the treadmills right in front of my ex boyfriend to make him feel bad. Whilst doing this, I tried to be cool and do that thing where as the treadmill slows down you turn around and just walk off the end. I fell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 075

You deserved it 68 635

First impressions

By Anonymous - 01/12/2024 15:00 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I joined a gym. I’m overweight and not very athletic, so I was nervous. I looked around and tried a treadmill. I start walking at a chill pace, then got ambitious and cranked it to a "light jog." Within seconds, I tripped, fell, and sent the emergency stop button flying across the room. The gym staff ran over and I swear someone said, “Well, at least he’s trying.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 457

You deserved it 112

abcdefghiloveyou 0

Friday 5 February 2010 16:09

YDI, it's not like it'll judge you.

Cthulu 0

Friday 5 February 2010 16:08

I bet it laughed at you and told you to lay off the Krispy Kremes. There are some lies that just can't be tolerated, even by a treadmill.

Comments

Thatguywhotrolls 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 3:36

Did you think it would judge you or something?

Deeznutzz13 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 5:06

Maybe you should do the Subway diet like Jared?

zaz123_fml 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 5:19

this is just rediculous... what's the point? the treadmill isn't going to say oh your fat.

iamtheplatypus 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 6:41

**** fat people. lots of people starve everyday. it should be a crime to be fat.

metazoanhaddock 11

Saturday 6 February 2010 9:03

is this the same person who lied to their wii about their weight?

mike210 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 9:42

hehehe thats funny i so do that too

hartattack4k 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 14:23

don't post this stupid bullshit, it's ur fault 4 being a fat lazy *****, so give up on life, besides, tredmills r bad 4 ur knees anyways, dumbass

xxalliechicxx 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 14:52

it's okay!The tredmill is your friend,tell it the truth!!

memorables 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 0:49

Why would you do that? And how in the world is this an FML? It's a machine, dumbass.

fotard2002 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 1:02

you know it's bad when you have to lie to inatamate objects about your weight

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The Top

Today, I went to visit my fiancé's dying grandmother in the hospital with him. She started talking to us about living each day to the fullest. His grandmother points to me and says, "Life is short. That's why you don't waste any time screwing girls who look like that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 780

You deserved it 4 168

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML

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You deserved it 9 464

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 9 866

You deserved it 2 278

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I agree, your life sucks 73 205

You deserved it 4 275

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I agree, your life sucks 327

You deserved it 155

Today, the creepy dude I’d been desperately trying to avoid was able to figure out which building I work in, the general vicinity of my house and which restaurants I frequent. He learned all this by the gifts I sent, not knowing it was him, on the Pokémon Go app. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 657

You deserved it 582

Today, I had to drive 300 miles to a town where I thought I'd forgotten my purse the night before. When I got to the hotel I had been staying at, I found out it was actually in the trunk of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 303

You deserved it 45 778

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I agree, your life sucks 43 043

You deserved it 13 123