Love: Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I...

By daniel55 - 18/02/2013 00:11 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 390

You deserved it 5 869

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By TronCat8230 - 20/05/2017 12:00

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time, and from what I'd heard he's super strict and uptight. I go in for the firm handshake after introducing myself while looking him in the eyes and I accidentally grabbed his junk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 077

You deserved it 2 165

By thisisavirus.exe - 31/12/2013 20:57 - United States - Sherwood

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time. The first thing he did was show me a bullet, then he basically said that if I don't submit to his daughter's every whim, that bullet will end my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 208

You deserved it 5 549

By Anonymous - 04/01/2014 23:13 - Canada - Hamilton

Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 699

You deserved it 5 699

Very very frightening

By graham - 11/01/2020 14:00

Today, my first time meeting my girlfriend's dad ended with him chasing me from his house and trying to hit me with a baseball bat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 848

You deserved it 356

By pdub523 - 27/01/2013 05:57 - United States - Longview

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 193

You deserved it 3 814

Time to leave

By Anonymous - 12/05/2023 18:00 - Australia

Today, I was meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time. When I went to shake her dad's hand, I broke his watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 684

You deserved it 160

By Anonymous - 12/04/2013 09:24 - Australia

Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 761

You deserved it 6 945

By whattheactualfuck - 22/01/2016 12:50 - South Africa - Durban

Today, my new girlfriend's father made good on his "What you do to her I do to you" threat when he took me out for drinks and then drunkenly hit on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 848

You deserved it 3 407

By Jes_jes18 - 02/05/2013 18:27 - United States

Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. I introduced myself and went to shake her hand. She looked me up and down and said, "I don't shake hands with whores." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 968

You deserved it 7 690

By Anonymous - 18/04/2014 22:07 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad at a tennis game. I could tell he despised me from the start, but it only got worse when I played him. He smashed the ball at me and I went to hit it, but I missed and fell over, tearing my arm up on the gravel. He had a smirk on his face for the rest of the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 431

You deserved it 4 243

BRLHP 24

Monday 18 February 2013 3:04

Sounds like he really likes ya.

jojo66567 5

Monday 18 February 2013 3:05

sounds like a real nutcracker

Comments

txguitarslinger 7

Monday 18 February 2013 15:00

"Oh no, I'm dating a girl with a father that wants me to treat her right" What a whiney bitch you are. I really hope she complains about you, and that he puts his foot up your ass. YDI.

Ibeatmyself 3

Monday 18 February 2013 15:38

I've been in that's situation he's all bark and no bite her dad will never do anything but show his teeth

xRezSynn 15

Monday 18 February 2013 16:34

Simple! Don't give your girlfriend a reason to complain about you.

katt_is_here 24

Monday 18 February 2013 17:15

Troll dad is awesome.

CountryBum 6

Monday 18 February 2013 17:56

It's just a scare tactic. He just wants to show you that he only wants the best for his daughter. If you can handle this, then maybe you have the balls to stick around and treat her right.

ulissey_fml 22

Monday 18 February 2013 21:59

What an -hey, Squeeze it- man.

KiddNYC1O 20

Monday 18 February 2013 23:09

Prove him wrong or lose manhood.

RaindrewxRomance 7

Tuesday 19 February 2013 4:33

That'll be me when my daughter starts dating

adam_night 9

Tuesday 19 February 2013 4:50

It's a sign of affection

stallingsjason 6

Tuesday 19 February 2013 5:03

Better than having a gun put to your head the first time you meet her dad, or having a knife put to your throat twice after that. FYI we are married now and he says I am the best son-in-law ever