Money: Today, I noticed an old bell at the bar so I rang it. It turns... - FML

By Christina - 05/12/2011 05:41 - Canada

Today, I noticed an old bell at the bar so I rang it. It turns out that when you ring the bell, you buy shots for the whole bar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 770

You deserved it 49 825

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

So close…

By barman - 17/07/2010 20:51 - Australia

Today, while working at the bar, I was having a flawless night. Every pour was perfect, every shot expertly measured. I saw my manager for the first time that night, turned to greet him, and knocked over a tray of 30 or so glasses. Only two remained unbroken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 812

You deserved it 5 357

By darn it. - 20/02/2009 16:16 - United States

Today, I was at a bar with a friend. A guy came up to me, took my drink and drank it. I laughed and jokingly said "now, you have to buy me a drink." He said "I would rather buy your friend a drink." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 049

You deserved it 4 156

It's on me

By doubledown - 04/06/2009 04:52 - United States

Today, I went to the bar I go to every week. My favorite bartender told me I owed $50 for a tab because the waiter screwed up and undercharged me. The tab was from when my friends bought me drinks to cheer me up because my girlfriend moved away. I ended up paying for my own drinks, plus theirs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 436

You deserved it 3 464

No buyers

By Kai Curtis - 17/01/2023 18:00 - United States - Exton

Today, I went to the bar because, I like to go to the bar every Saturday, but wearing a wedding ring so people wouldn't hit on me. But when I went this time, I forgot my ring and people still didn’t hit on me. So now I know it has nothing to do with the ring at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 283

You deserved it 1 012

By bells - 30/12/2009 06:08 - United States

Today, at the office, after a heavy night of drinking, I had to hear my boss walk around with bells attached to her shoes. She circled the office a total of 34 times today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 029

You deserved it 28 601

By halien1982 - 03/01/2010 06:36 - United States

Today, I was sitting at the bar of a popular local restaurant. I sat there for a few hours and drank my sorrows away with the bartender. I thought she was pretty, and decided to give her a large tip. The tip sent me over my credit card limit, and the bartender is not single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 429

You deserved it 35 431

Thanks, I hate it

By Anonymous - 11/12/2009 16:52 - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my friends and I went to our favorite pub to celebrate. As I'm a little broke at the moment, they all offered to buy me birthday drinks. Which I later learned meant that they would order them for me and bring them to the table, but put everything on my tab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 547

You deserved it 2 931

By Anonymous - 15/10/2013 00:14 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, my friend texted me from a bar, saying they had just called my name in a raffle to win a trip to Aspen, CO. You had to be at the bar to claim the prize. I had left the bar half-an-hour earlier, not knowing they were even having a raffle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 684

You deserved it 4 436

By Colleen - 18/01/2009 23:14 - United States

Today, I bought a party bowl of Bud Light for a get-together. Around midnight, I realized that I didn't have the tap to get the beer out. Fifty-five cans of untappable beer and no more beer money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 756

You deserved it 22 613

Gassy in 4/4

By nomwar - 17/06/2013 13:55 - United States

Today, I went to a new bar with friends. After arriving I became extremely gassy, so I planned a smooth release during the loud music. Little did I know, the bar occasionally dips its music to hear the guests singing. When the music turned off, all eyes turned to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 123

You deserved it 14 891

Next

Top comments

thatssomeBS 9

Monday 5 December 2011 11:37

Never ring a bell without knowing the consequences. Especially at a bar.

Naitras 15

Monday 5 December 2011 11:38

That is a really good policy. Great for business

Comments

AvikC818 8

Monday 5 December 2011 15:08

I wish I was at the bar when you did that

jkick 1

Monday 5 December 2011 15:14

Was it at the devils gap in banff?

hedgehog80 0

Monday 5 December 2011 15:22

It could have been worse.... It could have been a rape bell.

OctoberRainfall 13

Monday 5 December 2011 17:15

Why on earth would a bar have a rape bell?????

cheefer 0

Monday 5 December 2011 19:08

Hello, because the ugly people at bars need sex too!

desireev 17

Saturday 10 December 2011 15:24

I have never rolled my eyes so hard before!! That is the most stupid thing I've ever seen before! Just insert foot in mouth!! Save us all am earache!!!

Kornlover 9

Monday 5 December 2011 15:56

At least you made a lot more new friends.

compasseagle89 8

Monday 5 December 2011 16:15

it appears humans don't outgrow the exploring stage. babies stick things in their mouths, adults ring bells in bars.

xHuey123 0

Monday 5 December 2011 17:03

@48 I died laughing when I read that

rillastyle 1

Monday 5 December 2011 17:06

Don't turn you beer glass upside down Your telling the bar "I'll fight any commers"

Heeeerroin 5

Monday 5 December 2011 17:10

Next time I go to a bar and there's a bell, I'm gonna tell the guy next to me to ring the bell for strippers to come out. Sounds legit.

slyace 9

Monday 5 December 2011 17:43

Sounds like fun. There should be more stripper bells in the world. In bars, nightclubs, and parole offices

bramberkhout 10

Monday 5 December 2011 17:43

Hahaha welcome into adulthood OP!

punchline_fml 5

Monday 5 December 2011 17:50

Bet you were popular the rest of the night!

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Health Accident ADHD Medication Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 491

You deserved it 15 057

Today, I've spent nearly three weeks indulging my boyfriend's weird fetish, where he wears a hockey mask and I call him Jason. He just confessed it isn't really a fetish for him and that was just fucking with me. He's already told all his friends. I'm humiliated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 245

You deserved it 4 765

The Top

Today, while in the middle of giving my husband a blow job, I looked up to see him staring into space and vigorously picking his nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 650

You deserved it 6 199

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me for the fifth time, and all I could say was, "Can I have my parking permit back?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 388

You deserved it 31 881

Today, I had my window open while playing my Xbox when my angry neighbour came over and kicked my ass for spying on his wife in the shower. Apparently, my room is opposite their bathroom, but my TV faces the opposite way, so I wasn’t even facing the right direction to be spying. Plus, his wife is ugly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 144

You deserved it 132

Today, I was told that when I was in middle school and thought I was considered class clown for either making jokes or acting stupid, people thought I actually was stupid and/or mentally challenged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 914

You deserved it 2 603

Today, I was writing a very important email to my college professor. I went upstairs for something and came back down to send it. I later asked him today why he hadn't responded, to which he said, "I'm flattered… but can't." My roommate had added "love you xxx" at the end of the email. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 322

You deserved it 7 678

Today, while working at Walmart, I was walking the sales floor and passed the end of an aisle. I saw a customer coming at me from the corner of my eye, so I jumped backwards. I hit a display case, and watched it topple over before turning to apologize to the customer. It was a ladder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 089

You deserved it 10 010